Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Ben Affleck

Matt Damon and Ben Affleck Are Totally Related

Matt and Ben are Cousins?

The New England Historic Genealogical Society, who apparently has nothing better to do than investigate the DNA of people with really tight friendships has discovered a link between two of Hollywood’s hottest men who also just happen to be childhood BFFs and sometimes writing partners.

What did they discover about these two? Well, it turns out their equally good genes aren’t just a fluke. The two are actually cousins… 10 times removed. They share a 10th-great grandfather, William Knowlton of Ipswich who passed away back in 1655.

Who else are they related to? Well, Matt Damon is connected to six or seven presidents and Ben Affleck is an 11th cousin to our current prez, Barack Obama. Basically, William Knowlton is the original Jim Bob Duggar.

Ben Affleck: Jennifer Lopez Is Icky

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Is Ben Affleck becoming the new Jennifer Aniston?  It’s entirely possible, because he recently spoke with Contact Music about the time that he was one half of the duo Bennifer.

BEN AFFLECK has spoken out about his high-profile relationship with former girlfriend JENNIFER LOPEZ – insisting it was bad for his movie career.
The actor began dating the singer in 2002 after starring in Gigli with her, and the pair later became engaged before splitting up shortly before their scheduled wedding in 2004.
Affleck is adamant he should never have got involved in the first place – because the publicity surrounding their romance tainted his career.
He says, “I was no longer in control of my life. I thought I wanted certain things, but I didn’t. I got lost. I felt suffocated, miserable and gross. I should never have gone down that route or got sucked in to all the publicity.
“I was typecast as myself. Too many people weren’t getting past what they read about me. That was damaging. I can tell from experience it’s bad for you, and bad for your career. So I took a break, went away for a while and let things calm down.”

Coincidentally, all things J. Lo make me feel suffocated too.  Of course that might have to do with my burying my face in a pillow and screaming whenever she appears on my radio or television screen.

Ben, you are a wise man and no longer overexposed.  Now, could you speak with a certain over-peroxided couple that need to learn the same lesson that you did?

Not Splitsville! Yet!!!

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It seems like every time we get a round of rumors about Ben Affleck and Jen Garner calling it quits, we get another set of photos of them walking through a park with their adorable daughters.

Here’s Ben and Jen, along with Seraphina and Violet, looking very much the happy family in Boston today.

Are Jen and Ben on the Rocks?

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They’ve seemed like the perfect couple for years now, but, with the arrival of the new baby, rumors are a-swirlin’ that there’s trouble in paradise for Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck. The couple were supposed to attend the White House Correspondents’ dinner this weekend (check out vid of comedienne Wanda Sykes performing there), but they canceled at the very last minute. In fact, a limo even arrived at their Boston home to take them to the airport, but it was sent away. Why would they be no-shows for such an important event for an administration they’ve supported so eagerly? I don’t think they had a sick kiddo or anything — Jen was photographed Monday on a walk with Violet and Seraphina, both looking healthy as can be. They haven’t released any statement explaining their sudden absence from the DC dinner.

If Jen and Ben break up, I’ll just be crushed. Does no one’s marriage work out?

A Normal Family!

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Here’s Ben and Jen picking up little Violet from school together.

Aside from the fact that they’re being photographed by paparazzi, you’d never know these two were famous. They’re just a couple taking a break from the baby at home to pick up the kiddo at school, and maybe catch fifteen minutes of alone time in the process.

Love them!

Scarlett Johansson Is So Not Into Teeth Whitening. Or Normal Nostrils, For That Matter

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Last night was the LA premiere of He’s Just Not That Into You.  We already saw what anorex-shrek looked like, but what do you think of Scarlett Johansson’s new look?  I struggle every single time I write her last name.  I have a mental block against the spelling; the mnemonic device of “slutty Scarlett” has helped greatly.

Angie Dickinson Drew Barrymore was seen hugging Justin Long which should prompt a rash of “Drew and Mac Guy Reunited” stories; I was just grateful for the embrace so I didn’t have to look at the stains on his shirt or that frosted Revlon “Pink in the Afternoon” lipstick crap she’s so committed to lately.  Or her dress.  Or tongue ring…sigh.

The best Jennifer Aniston could do was an uncombed ponytail and unknown soap star, Jacqueline MacInnes Wood, accessorized her Long John Silver’s uniform with croc shoe boots and a large patent leather maxi-pad.  Kevin Connolly is still cute, Ben Affleck wishes he was dead and Jimmy Fallon’s wife is getting better looking with time.