Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Bjork Requests A Homely Atmosphere

The biggest non-celebrities always have the longest list of criteria and most involved riders; their list of must-haves when performing.  Meryl Streep’s on set needs document probably reads “If you can get some bagels that would be great but don’t make a special trip.”

Anyway, Bjork’s rider states that she wants a homely backstage area.  That should be accomplished easily enough; wall-to-wall mirrors in her dressing room oughta do it.  In addition, she has such requests as halfa bottle of Remy Martin and a coat rack with ample hangers.  I wonder what would happen if they provided a whole bottle of Remy Martin?  Would she go all Johnny Depp hotel room on someone?  I can so see that nut bag screaming “What the fuck!?  I said 375mls!”  Speaking of screaming, her rider also lists a requirement of a bottle of honey.  Might try a vat Bjork…though I’m not sure any amount can soothe that cat caught in the wheel of a sedan screech of yours.

Another rider that just left me stunned was Vanessa Hudgen’s.  “All cups, glasses, plates, silverware, napkins should be of quality material.”  Who the fuck does she think she is?  Vanessa, for as long as you are responsible for Sneakernight, which is forevermore, you have no right to be calling the shots on tableware.  You should thank the lucky stars above if you get Chinet.

Now, I do love Taylor Swift.  But I read the condescending line “Edememe  (it’s soy beans…in frozen vegetable section)” and it makes me feel like she, or more likely her manager, needs to double up on the requested cases of, um, “Smart Water.”   If you want to request the fancy stuff, learn how to spell it.

Daughtry’s rider just made me sad.  Chris, I implore you, please aspire for more in life than Honey Smacks, strawberries with a peel and an existence without spellcheck.  Life doesn’t have to be so bleak.

33 CommentsLeave a comment

  • My god, Wendie, is this the first time you’ve visited the Smoking Gun?
    These are some of the LEAST crazy I’ve seen.
    And you seem irrationally angry today. Is something wrong, dear?

  • Dude. Did she mean “homey” and not “homely.” I don’t know why anyone would go out of their way to make sure their dressing room etc was ugly

  • My, my, wendie (interesting spelling, by the way…Windy seems more apropos, but I digress)…certain shades of green just doesn’t seem to be an attractive color…but you sure are jonesing for some.

    Bjork may not be everyone’s cuppa but she’s miles beyond someone having a pissy day and getting to write about it on SOMEONE ELSE’S BLOG…and presumably get paid for it. Whassup wid that???

  • Oh pleeease, stop moaning about wendie being this and that, and this and that, you kindergarten kids.
    She complains, and criticizes, and gets paid for it, and you are all just so damn jealous because she has such an awesome job.

  • WTF? I clicked on this story and I’m reading the comments, and it says I’m “spotlight” and my comment is awaiting moderation. For proof — it says “Oh pleeease, stop moaning about wendie being this and that…” etc. How is this possible? Your site is not secure, obviously. Cute article though.

  • wow, you are fucking kidding me! musicians making demands on their riders? holy shit, who would have thunk it? i’ve already called both my mother and my step mother and woke them up and told them to log on and read this amazing shit because they aren’t gonna fuckin’ believe that famous musicians make demands before concerts! whoo hoo, you’ve hit a fucking goldmine with this one wendie! from the bottom of my surprised heart, thanks for the inside info. this is almost as good as the post yesterday that revealed that obama had a white mom and a black dad. you didn’t see that shit on fox, did you. two fucking miracles back to back. go get ’em detective wendie.

  • Björk makes these venues SHITLOADS of money…the least they could do for her is give her some soft lighting and some honey. word.

  • WENDIE WHY DO YOU KEEP GOING ON AND ON IN YOUR POSTS?

    If they were interesting enough pieces of news you wouldn’t have to keep rambling and bitching for multiple paragraphs to make it appear as though you’re doing your job.

  • In some parts of the world they say “homely” instead of “homey.” I think it might be a Britishism like “plaster” for “band-aid” or “orientate” instead of “orient.”

    I’m surprised Bjork’s requests aren’t more unusual..like asking for traditional Icelandic food items like a rotten shark dish I heard about recently…too bad.

  • man you guys sure do bitch about wendie a lot. maybe you should start your own blogs. jeebus.

    I mean.. people making fun of wendie for doing her job? how does that even make sense? like, we are all obviously appreciate of people who do her kind of job- as in, we all obviously like reading celebrity blogs.

    I love fast food, so I wouldn’t go to In & Out and make fun of the people who make my delicious food.

    and god, censorthis… what the hell site do you think this is anyway? this isn’t cnn for fuck’s sake. it’s a GOSSIP BLOG. maybe your statements would seem less ironic on a more traditional news site… not one that is based around criticizing celebrities and the silly things they do

    I like that many people also bitch at wendie for being whiney and yet spend their time whining on the comments. at least wendie is getting paid for her moans.

    so I guess it’s actually pointless for me to stick up for her, since she is getting the last laugh anyway.

  • Coral is right, in some places “homely” means the same as “homey”, and does not imply ugly in this context.

    Either way, I suppose if you’ve never been involved in any sort of theatrical/musical production, you can’t appreciate how much it means to the artists and their staff to have some creature comforts at the venue, and also how important it is to have security around so every creep and star fucker doesn’t get backstage and hassle them before a show or even steal their belongings.

    Also, some venues/promoters can be the cheapest, lowest creatures on earth, and without specifically spelling out to them what items in what quantities are desired, they would leave the artist/musician and the entire crew with three twinkies and a six-pack of Bud to fight over. Cheap fucking bastards that they are, everything must be spelled out and insisted upon.

    Considering how crazy some riders are, Bjork’s looks pretty conservative and reasonable, imho.

  • This is suposed to be about the musician riders ffs.. Quit talking about Wendie..

    This is actually the first time i get to read one of these things (riders) and i am iimpressed… I didn’t know you get to ask for all that shit for free lol. That’s ridiculous.. Vanessa hudgens wants a recliner? why in the fuck would she want that for? don’t she have enough money to buy one for herself?.. What the hell?.. And what’s up with the million drinks for everybody???? I don’t get it at all.. These people are fucking rich!…

  • I think the problem that I have with this post is that wendie seems to be trying too hard to be “entertaining”. Unfortunately, most of us have probably seen (and perused) The Smoking Gun. It’s old news.

  • Incidentally…

    Main Entry: home·ly
    Pronunciation: \ˈhōm-lē\
    Function: adjective
    Date: 14th century

    1: suggestive or characteristic of a home
    2: being something familiar with which one is at home

  • Y’all, I get the impression that wendie’s got some big ass balls that can she can use to defend herself. Just giving her a little razzle isn’t going to send her into therapy. I get the feeling the therapist would run for cover if she showed up on her couch.

    So lay off the lecturing of those that may or may not disagree with the girl, eh? It’s just a freakin’ blog…just some freakin’ razzin’…it’s been a bit tough ’round these parts this week…

    Damn….

  • I love bjork and her screaming. At least I love everything up to the last few albums. She puts on amazing shows too. I think she is probably just a weird gal. I doubt she was asking too much… honestly, I bet all these “demands” are nothing compared to the likes of Madonna or Mariah Carey!!

  • A. – What BettyCrockerPunkRocker said, agree with it all & ditto.

    B. – I’m always piping up and defending Wendie the writer, but not this time. What’s your beef with Bjork? That woman is a goddamn genius, no one can replicate her voice. So what about the unusual riders? They REAly are not that unusual, at ALL. These are tame, completely normal rider requests you’ve shown us here. WTF? Now show me something truly bizarre and diva-esque, and I’ll be impressed, but just ragging on Bjork and Vanessa Hudgens for their completely average riders and adding insult to injury by ragging on Bjork’s singing voice, is just altogether uncool, and irritating to read. Where’s the wit? I only see bitter. Tant pis.

  • Hey, look, I toured in aus with Bjork, she has like 20 people on stage, so asking for space for 30 isn’t a stretch, and really, asking for security and a half decent changing room is not being a diva. She’s got a lot of people she employs as part of her show, and she doesn’t want to be hassled when she’s backstage. No one does. Sorry to everyone who has ever met their idol backstage, but its where everyone chills out, runs over the set, and since you’re away from home all you want is a comfortable space to nap, chat or drink. But seriously, backstage at a gig or festival is mostly musicians sleeping. No coke or hookers. Sorry to destroy the dream.

  • I don’t hate Wendie, I just wish Beet or Wendie would address this BIG FUCKING elephant in the room though. Give us a little something real to chew on here.

  • The only problem I have with Wendie is that she seems to hate pretty much everyone. Apart from that, I think she’s doing a good job.

  • Wendie’s posts just appear to be trying too hard to be edgy. It just ends up sad. I also think she could benefit from someone editing her posts (for spelling and punctuation).

  • I wonder how many of these posters actually applied for Wendie’s job? Some of these posts must be the result of jealousy. I understand that sometimes it seems like Wendie is trying a little too hard…and sometime things aren’t spelled correctly…but a lot of the criticism is undeserved and if you’re an Evil Beet fan the you’re just going to have to get used to the fact that there are now two writers and Wendie isn’t an exact replica of Beet.

    My advice would be for Wendie would be to stop trying so hard and stop being so negative in every post….and yes, I agree that the posts should be proofread a couple of times.

  • @Spotlight

    DITTO. another “Lynn” has shown up and started posted in the last 6 weeks, or so. It pisses me off too.

  • Hell, i’d be making these demands too… Shoot, i’d be asking for Special K cereal with 50 raisins picked out from the Raisin Bran cereal box.

  • rocksee, what elephant?

    oh, and that makes more sense, that homey=homely. I didn’t know the two could be used interchangeably

  • In every other English speaking nation in the world besides America, the word ‘homely’ is used to mean comfortable or cozy. Americans are the only ones who say ‘homey’.

    Presumably the English that Bjork speaks, and that her management people speak, is British English, making ‘homely’ exactly the correct phraseology.

    Little bit of research would have gone a long way in making wendie not look like an insular American ignoramus.

  • all i have to say is taylor swift’s people probably got tired of being asked, “what’s edamame?” it’s all about expediting the process.

    i have no input on the wendie debate except to say that i trust that beet would not put her beloved blog in the hands of someone unworthy.

    nuff said.

  • Jeez, she probably just wanted the honey for her tea instead of nasty refined white sugar. Makes sense to me. I’ve seen riders of bands that play the local Folk Fest with more outrageous demands.