Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Lindsay Lohan Is “Exploring” Islam, Apparently

lindsay lohan
While Lindsay Lohan probably thought her engagement to some Russian billionaire was going to get her loads of press (and probably some acting jobs), apparently her phone hasn’t been ringing quite enough for her liking. That’s why she’s had to come up with another story to hit the press, and she’s gone with… exploring Islam? That’s right, Lindsay is trying to figure out if she wants to become a Muslim, and it’s a totally real spiritual journey and not at all yet another desperate and twisted cry for attention!

From The New York Post:

Lohan, 29, who was spotted carrying a copy of the Koran while tending to her community service in New York last summer, also said there’s more to the text than what many people have been led to believe.

“America has portrayed holding a Koran in such a different way to what it actually is,” she explained, despite having yet to complete it.

“I’m not done reading it. Do you know how long that would take? It takes so long,” Lohan said.

A rep for Lohan confirmed that she is exploring religions.

“Lindsay has always been very spiritual and is open to exploring all religions and beliefs. She is simply educating herself on other people’s beliefs,” her rep told Page Six.

Only Lindsay Lohan would make what’s meant to be a private journey of self-discovery and spirituality a gossip news item. How long before she becomes a Buddhist next? How about Hindu? She can just keep circling through them until no one cares anymore. Oh wait, we already don’t!

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  • Lindsay!… you are more valued, and valuable, than all of the gems on all of the planets!… circling all of the stars, in all of the galaxies!… in whole of God’s created universe! You are God’s little girl!… and His precious gift to us, and to His Kingdom come!… and for whom His son, paid an awesome price! And His love for you shines brighter than all the beacons of His Holy Realm, combined! And for Him!… and for those for who would be blessed through you!… is the reason, why you were born!

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    Thank you!… sweetheart!… for your Valentine’s Instagram message, from 1 Corinthians 13: 4-8 [NIV]

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    To close… and for those who may wonder about Islam… and its place in the world… I offer you the following…

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    JESUS CHRIST, MUHAMMAD, AND THE GOP

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    In an attempt to ascertain the Biblical Truth concerning the veracity of the “claims” attributed to the said prophet Muhammad (by whomever, and whenever), and afterupon my examination of both the Old and New Testaments of the Bible, I happened upon a couple of remarkable verses in the Book of Luke, in the New Testament, of the Bible (although, found elsewhere, within the New Testament!).

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    Under the Book of Luke, Chapter 16, Verse 16, we read, “The Law and the Prophets were proclaimed UNTIL (my emphasis) John (i.e., John the Baptist!)”… and, within the Book of Luke, Chapter 7, Verse 28, we read, “I say to you, among those born of women, there is NO ONE (my emphasis) greater than John (i.e., John the Baptist!)”! [Gideons Translation]

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    Simply stated, if the claim on page 8 of the book titled, The Quran Translated: Message For Humanity, is correct… and which reads, “… Being the last of these Prophets, Muhammad was to be God’s FINAL (and thus, UNIVERSAL!) Messenger…”… then!… the words attributed to Christ within the Book of Luke, Chapter 7, Verse 28, are UNTRUE! And so!… making Christ “confused”– at best!… or– worse!– A LIAR! But, if the words of Christ within the Book of Luke, Chapter 7, Verse 28, and, in Chapter 16, Verse 16, are TRUE!… then!… not only was Muhammad NOT the greatest of the Prophets, he (Muhammad!)– and, more importantly!– COULD NOT HAVE BEEN A PROPHET, AT ALL (i.e., as such is described, within the pages of the Bible!)! For!… how could the Law and the Prophets be up UNTIL John, yet– nevertheless!– a subsequent prophet (and yea!… supposedly!… THE GREATEST PROPHET!) is revealed some six hundred years after the fact, of the time of Christ?

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    And thus, the battle… then!– obviously!… is between the claims proffered by those believing themselves to be a part of some historic truth (Islam!)!… and, the claims CLEARLY ATTRIBUTED to Christ! And as for the said appearance of Archangel Gabriel to Muhammad to bestow upon Muhammad a SPECIAL PROPHETIC DISPENSATION (as outlined in the work, The Quran Translated: Message For Humanity!), such an act by Gabriel (something not mentioned in the Bible!) would put Gabriel in conflict with the words, and will, of Jesus Christ!… and– ultimately!– in conflict with GOD! And so, if the said prophet Muhammad did in fact receive a visit from an Angel, I would strongly assert that that Angel, was someone OTHER, than Gabriel!

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    The foregoing finding notwithstanding, the view of the “self-avowed/ averred” CHRISTIAN RIGHT, and its supporters (e.g., the Right-wing GOP!), that THESE have a “DEVINE/ SACROSANCT DISPENSATION (i.e., ‘blessed by God’– AND YEA, ‘A RIGHT, AT THE HEART, OF THE TEACHINGS OF JESUS CHRIST!’)”, and/ or, a “FUNDAMENTAL HUMAN RIGHT (in deference to the Non-believing, Humanist members of the GOP!)” to bear arms in defence of themselves (e.g., against the likes of ISIS!), and in defence of the “downtrodden” of the world, is… well!… SUSPECT! And, begs the question: “Is their ‘defensive position’– at all!– TRUE?” Well… let us examine (i.e., those who profess Christ!) a few further New Testament passages, to find out!

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    In Matthew Chapter 05, Verse 38, Christ states: “You’ve heard that it has been said: ‘An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth.’ But I say to you, THAT YOU NOT RESIST (PHYSICALLY CONTEND WITH!) EVIL: WHOSOEVER SHALL HIT YOU ON ONE CHEEK, TURN TO THAT ONE, ALSO, THE OTHER.” In Matthew Chapter 10, Verse 16, Christ states, “Be aware, I send you out AS SHEEP, in the midst of wolves; therefore, be as wise as serpents, BUT HARMLESS, AS DOVES.”

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    Next, the ensuing is a question put to Christ from a Pharisaic lawyer… in an effort to tempt Christ! In Matthew, Chapter 22, Verse 36, the Pharisaic lawyer asks: “Master, which is the GREAT COMMANDMENT in the Law?”; V37) Jesus said unto him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind”; V38) “This is the first and GREAT COMMANDMENT”; V39) “And the second is like unto it… ‘YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR, AS YOURSELF'”; V40) “On these two commandments, HANG ALL THE LAW, AND THE PROPHETS.”

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    Next, are the words of Paul to the Ephesians, concerning the Christian’s struggle with evil: In Ephesians Chapter 06, Verse 12, Paul states: “FOR WE (CHRISTIANS!) WRESTLE NOT AGAINST FLESH AND BLOOD; BUT, AGAINST PRINCIPALITIES, AGAINST POWERS, AGAINST THE RULERS OF THE DARKNESS OF THIS WORLD, AGAINST SPIRITUAL WICKEDNESS IN HIGH PLACES.”

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    Next, in advance of his anticipated sojourn to the Garden of Gethsemene, Jesus sought to convey an important message to his entourage– and, to all others who might bear witness (then, and in the future!)!– about the evil of physically resisting/ contending with evil (in an effort to vanquish it!)! And… in preparation, set in motion, the ensuing means– whereby!– his message to be told, could be told! In Luke, Chapter 22, Verse 36, Christ states to his entourage: “But now let the one who has a moneybag take it!… and likewise, a knapsack! And let the one who has no sword, sell his cloak, and buy one (a sword!)”; V37) “For I tell you, that this Scripture must be fulfilled… in me: ‘And he was numbered with the transgressors.'” “For what is written about me, has its fulfillment”; V38) And they said (those with Christ!): “Look, Lord, here are two swords.” And he (Jesus!) said to them: “It is enough”; V39) And when Jesus came out, he went (as was his custom!) to the Mount of Olives; and his disciples followed him.

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    Next, subsequent to the foregoing, and upon completion of his efforts in the Garden of Gethsemene, Jesus stood ready to confront the evil, advancing upon him and his followers. In Matthew, Chapter 26, Verse 46, Jesus states: “Rise, let us be going. See… my betrayer is at hand”; V47) While he was still speaking, Judas came (one of the twelve!)… and, with him, a great crowd… with swords, and clubs… from the Chief Priests… to the elders of the people; V48) Now the betrayer had given them (those with Judas!) a sign; and, saying to them (those with Judas!): “The one I will kiss, is the man… seize him”; V49) And he came up to Jesus, at once, and said: “Greetings, Rabbi!”… and he (Judas!) kissed him (Jesus!); V50) Jesus said to him: “Friend, do what you came to do.” Then they (those with Judas!) came up, and laid hands on Jesus… and seized him; V51) And suddenly, one of those who were with Jesus stretched out his hand, drew his sword, and struck the servant of the High Priest… cutting off his ear; V52) Then Jesus said to the one who drew the sword: “PUT YOUR SWORD BACK INTO ITS PLACE. FOR ‘ALL’ WHO USE THE SWORD, WILL PERISH BY THE SWORD”; V53) “Do you think (Jesus asked!) that I can’t appeal to my Father… who will, at once, send me more than twelve legions of Angels”; V54) “But how, then (if God were to do this!… and as Jesus continued!) shall the Scriptures be fulfilled?”… that thus, it must be so (i.e., that this, is the way Christ should die)?”

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    An interesting response to his disciples– to say the least!… and, after having compelled them to buy, and bring the weapons, in the first place! But!– and as it turned out!– to teach them (and all who would eventually receive these actions, and words!), an important lesson!… that, VENGENCE IS GOD’S PREROGATIVE!– NOT MAN’S!; NOT THOSE CLAIMING CHRIST; AND, NOT IN THIS WORLD! And!… Jesus adds an additional reinforcement in the Book of John. In John, Chapter 18, Verse 36, Jesus states: “MY KINGDOM ‘IS NOT’ OF THIS WORLD, IF IT WERE, MY SERVANTS ‘WOULD HAVE FOUGHT’, THAT I MIGHT NOT BE DELIVERED OVER TO THE JEWS!…” In other words, His Servants DID NOT PHYSICALLY RESIST EVIL!… EITHER TO SAVE CHRIST, OR THEMSELVES!… AND WERE COMMANDED BY CHRIST, NOT TO DO SO!

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    And so, are we (who profess Christ!) to adopt the view… today?– in 2016?… that THIS WORLD (the world that Christ declared was NOT His Kingdom!), IS TO BE MADE HIS KINGDOM– OUR KINGDOM (THROUGH BLOODSHED!)?… and, as if, The Kingdom of Heaven, had arrived?

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    And further… and in a perverse– and I suggest, SATANIC-BACKED!– attempt to subvert the simple story of the AGAPE LOVE of Jesus Christ for God, and mankind, the following Bible passage is often cited as some kind of “Devine Support” for the position, that “CHRISTIANS” should “BATTLE EVIL, THROUGH THE FLESH”! In John, Chapter 15, Verse 13, Christ states: “GREATER LOVE HAS NO ONE, THAN THIS: THAT ONE LAY DOWN ONE’S LIFE, FOR ONE’S FRIENDS!”

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    The questions to be asked here, are these: “Is the ‘laying down’ of one’s life for one’s friends (as a Christian!), the same, as TAKING THE LIFE OF ANOTHER, OR THE LIVES OF OTHERS, IN ONE’S DEFENCE, OF ONE’S FRIENDS?” And if so, how can/ does such a position remain CONSISTENT, with the totality– AND CLEAR!– teachings, of Jesus Christ?

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    Simply put, given all of the aforenoted Scriptures (and those unstated!), there can be ONLY ONE TRANSLATION for John, Chapter 15, Verse 13… and that is: “OUR ‘LAYING DOWN’ OF ONE’S LIFE FOR A FRIEND– I.E., AS A TRUE CHRISTIAN, AND IN THE SPIRIT OF GOD!– MUST BE IN THE MANNER, OF JESUS CHRIST (I.E., ‘WITHOUT’ THE SHEDDING OF THE BLOOD, OF ANY OTHER)!”

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    As a footnote– AND PLEA!– to the followers of Islam, and to the Global Muslim Community (leaving aside, for the moment, those who are of other faiths!), remember!… Islam attests to the existence of the person of Jesus Christ; however, the Old Testament (the Testament and Bible, of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob!… to which, Islam is said to subscribe!) DOES NOT ATTEST TO THE PERSON OF MUHAMMAD! And a Testament, and Bible, that preceded the birth of Jesus Christ!… and!… His New Testament!

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    One can only speculate as to why Muhammad, and Islam emerged!… possibly the encroachment of Judaism!… and possibly the additional encroachment of the Roman Catholic movement (of which, St. Paul… in tears!… warned the 1st century Christians, would arise!… and, which took the lives of many Christians, and non-christians, alike!– and, in the name of God, and Christ!)! But, whatever the reasons!… the words of Christ are clear!… John the Baptist, WAS THE ONLY FINAL!… AND GREAT!… PROPHET OF GOD!

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    Please!… no emails!

  • And yet one more thing Lindsay didn’t finish. Like Rehab, Community service, Rehab, Community service, Rehab and Rehab …… ;P