I really like Carrie Underwood. There’s no real rhyme or reason to that, but I do. A couple of her songs are damn good (‘Blown Away’ is my shit!) but I’ve never listened to a full album and I haven’t exactly kept up on her career, I just think she seems nice. I dunno, don’t ask me. Anyway, turns out her massive success following her American Idol win hasn’t all been positive – in fact, it caused major anxiety attacks for her for a very long time.
From Marie Claire (via US Weekly):
“At the beginning of my career, I used to have panic attacks. People were touching me, screaming – it made me really nervous. In public, I just get nervous. It’s a physical reaction, feeling like the walls are closing in,” she explains.
“The fans are great. It’s not their fault. I don’t ever want to come across as ungrateful. But on my end, it is hard for me to process. Because I am still just me.”
I get anxiety when a stranger emails me, so I kind of can’t imagine having millions of people in my face 24/7. It would not be a good thing, that’s for sure. It seems like she’s got things a bit more under control now, which is good… though she does have a bit of an interpersonal problem.
“I’m not a mushy person at all. We were never a huggy family. Or a ‘let’s talk it out’ family. Technically I have siblings, but they are quite a bit older than me. I was the accident, so I have the only-child syndrome going on,” Underwood admits. “I’m a little more selfish, a little more independent, a little closed. I do wish I were softer. I wish I were able to form relationships better. But hey, I mean, I’m not a sociopath.”
Well, that’s a relief.