Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Steven Tyler, Alice Cooper and … Weird Al? Teamed Up for an Impromptu New Year’s Performance

So, the main thing that resonates with me after watching this video? MAD. AWKWARD. Let’s break it down, shall we? Steven Tyler is the diva-est of the male stage divas, rubbing his tits and running his hands through his hair plugs, waving his wasted little arms around and singing into everyone else’s microphone because there’s gotta be a little bit of Steven Tyler all over the f-cking place. And OF COURSE he’s got to table dance at the end of the performance, humping the air and making the white-guys-can’t-dance face. Dear God.

Then you have Weird Al who’s doing the death metal version of ‘Come Together’, and trying to out-do Steven Tyler in over-the-top-ness. And he almost succeeds, because through most of the clip, I can’t watch anything but him.

Finally, Alice Cooper is unsure of the lyrics to one of the greatest songs ever written, and claps along to the music like he’s f-cking Barney or something. Poor Alice Cooper. He’d probably kill himself twenty years ago if you told him what he’d be doing in twenty years and with whom.

So, OK. In short, I’m not saying that I’d be, like, complaining or anything if I walked into some random bar and these three dudes were performing (because come on, who would?) but I stick to my original assertions that the whole thing was painfully, madly awkward. Cool as shit, yes, but awks, seriously.

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