So here at Evil Beet we’ve got some more fun stuff in the works for you guys. I know a lot of you are all like, ‘Bitch, don’t be tellin’ me to do stuff’ when you see the commanding ‘CAPTION THIS’ on select postings, so we’ve decided to be super awesome, and in return for your acerbic wit, we’re going to be giving stuff away.
Starting somewhere around April 1st, weekly ‘Caption This’ articles will run and you guys will get some kind-of-awesome Evil Beet-themed stuff shipped right to your door if you’re the funniest. We’ll draw a winner weekly and if your caption is the most amusing, it’ll pays off.
Get practicing!
“This crap would be so much easier to take onstage if I was wearing my ass-less leather chaps!”
I’ve always heard that a good crap was almost as good as an orgasm. Now I know why…
Taylor’s so hardcore – I bet she shits rusty nails.
“Christ, how long is this set gonna last? I really need to take a grundle.”
Does this apply to Canada too?
Sure does!
How about the UK?
Yep, the UK too!
I’m on the crap-kins diet!
Maybe if I take an actual shit on stage people will forget how shitty my music is. Obviously my tits aren’t distracting enough.
heroin kills
where DO i plug this microphone?
Am I going to be able to hold it in till the end of the show?
I seriously debated posting this because of her age, but then thought…. Eh, fuck it, it’s Momsen!
“I hope the new roadie is able to change the batteries WITHOUT pullin the dong outta my ass!”
Taylor ditches her “best friend” for her fist… and boy does she like it.
I f*** for satan, and the spawn is crowning!!!
Yes!!! Ahaha
“Blasting a duece on stage is so non-comforming and indie and awesome and grunge and I’m Taylor Momsen Bithces!”
“…and all this time we thought that sh*tty noise was coming out of her mouth.”
“F*CK THE WORLD! I can sh*t wherever I want!! I’m a f*ckin’ ROCKSTAR, b*tches!!! “
“I knew I shouldn’t have ate at Taco Bell before the show”.
“You make me wanna……..Oops, Excuse me.”
i have to poop.
Yay!
” Must…stop…eating…so…much…CHEESE!”
Watch as I drop the worth of my career on stage.
“Really? How many retakes is Kanye going to make me do for our new music video?”
It’s coming, it’s coming…!! AAHHH, it came.
When you gotta go.. you gotta go.
Insert paper below for quality autograph…
I shoulda waited to take that ExLax.
Taking a dump onstage is the new courtney love.
Where’s the KABOOM ? There’s supposed to be an earth shattering KABOOM !
“Ahhh Shiiiiit this is my jam!” — Taylor