Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Jessica Simpson is Engaged

PopSugar is saying that Jessica Simpson’s rep has confirmed her engagement to her boyfriend of not all that long, Eric Johnson. Eric supposedly proposed to Jessica on Thursday, roughly a week after her ex-husband Nick Lachey announced his engagement to his girlfriend of several years, Vanessa Minnillo.

Where do I begin?

1) That ring looks like it’s from Kay Jewelers, straight up. It’s mad rude to snark on the size and quality of another woman’s engagement ring, but I guess I’m just a rude-ass bitch. I mean… Yellow gold and rubies? He’s obviously not planning on her wearing that thing for very long. Like, what the hell ever happened to classic versatility? You can bash Khloe Kardashian all day, but I respect the hell out of her and Lamar’s ring choice. ANNNNYYYWAAAAYY….

2) Who the hell is Eric Johnson? Obviously he wants to marry Jessica Simpson. Isn’t he some dude from Yale and family money? Jessica Simpson agreeing to do him on the regular is probably the best thing that ever happened to him.

3) Really, Jessica? Engaged a week after Nick? I know subtlety has never really been your forte, but like… get a clue, girl. Announcing your engagement a week after your ex announces his is like pointing a flashing red arrow at yourself that reads “I’M NOT OKAY.”

Whatever. I wish them both a ton of happiness.

4 CommentsLeave a comment

  • Or maybe Nick got wind of Jessica’s engagement and beat her to the punch? I mean really, he’s been with Vanessa Minillo (barf) for, what, 5 years? They just HAD to come out as engaged now?

  • Fugly ring aside, I feel bad for the ex-wife that Eric Johnson was married to for 5 years that he JUST divorced!
    “Um, thanks for the quickie divorce honey, but it’s time for me to go marry Jessica Blimpson now!

    Best wishes to Nick and Vanessa. He’s better off without JS.
    She seems way too desperate to have a man, just like Kim Kardashian.

  • bella~ judging by your username I’ll assume you’re a twitard. Fuck, just reading your post makes you seem like a simpleton.

    I don’t even care for her all that much but, Jessica “Blimpson?” Even when she’s gained a few pounds she’s still an extremely beautiful woman. I’d stake money that you’re a hog who makes comments like that to make yourself fel a little better, all the while stuffing your face with a few KFC Double Downs.

    I highly doubt she’s desperate for a man either. That is one girl who could have pretty much anyone she wants. So go cram some fries into your maw and STFU.