So, Kate Gosselin, ex-wife of herped-out Jon Gosselin, alum of Dancing With the Stars, oh, and mother of eight children (always forget that last bit), is taking the cover of People magazine yet again — but not for family drama or diva-like behavior. Gosselin’s toned, taut and tanned figure graces the cover of the magazine once again, boasting that she’s in the best shape of her life and deserves the right to flaunt it. She’s been through so much, after all.
On the topic of her dramatic figure shift, Kate says:
“[This is] the most fit I’ve ever been … I’ve worked really hard! Haven’t I earned the right, at this point, to look good?”
In addition to agreeing that yes, Kate does look fabulous, I’m going to say “Sure, Kate. You’ve earned everything you’ve gotten. All of the money and all of the ill-deserved fame. You’ve totally earned it all.” And they say that assholery gets you nowhere.
Kate was also photographed this past week on vacation in Cabo, Mexico, with her bodyguard “friend,” Steve Neild, who is also her bodyguard. Though allegations of a sexual nature have been surfacing like that dead body that just won’t sink, both still maintain that there’s no relationship beyond that of a working one.
Good God. We live in a day and age where people like Kate Gosselin — Kate Gosselin, for fuck’s sake — need a bodyguard. I surrender my human card. I’m out.