Today's Evil Beet Gossip

If Kat Von D is Really Pregnant With Jesse James’ Child, I Will Eat My Hat

photo of jesse james and new girlfriend kat von d at wonderland gallery opening is kat von d pregnant pictures photos baby bumps

And by ‘eat my hat,’ I clearly mean ‘eat a gun,’ but didn’t think it was entirely appropriate to blast the words EAT A GUN! in the headline of this post. I mean, some of you are at work, and a headline of such nature would surely attract the boss’s attention (unless you are the boss, and in that case, kudos to you). I’m not looking to get anyone fired today, you know.

Anyway, is reporting that Kat Von D just might be pregnant, and the father of said zygote is none other than Jesse James. I mean, yeah, Von D could very well be carrying the child of Michelle “Bombshell” McGee, because I’ve heard that Nazi reproductive organs can do some pretty creepy telepathic things, but I’m sort of doubting that.

What are they basing their speculation upon, you’re wondering? The apparent “baby bump” that Von D was sporting when the couple went public with their hand-holding and sloppy-smooching last week, which we covered here at EB.

But me?  Nah.  I don’t think it’s a baby bump. I think Kat just likes to eat entire cans of Pringles (ranch, notably, as they’re my favorite and fuck, this is my half-baked explanation) on the couch while she and Jesse play Scrabble and Sudoku night in and night out.

Your thoughts — is Kat carrying the spawn of Satan Jesse, or is the absurd rumor mill at it again? Check out the photos and decide for yourself.

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