Today's Evil Beet Gossip

If You Won Any Bets Saying Lindsay Wouldn’t Be in Jail For More Than Two Weeks, Now’s the Time to Collect Your Money

As you’re all probably aware, the phenomena known as Lindsay Lohan has made her grand exit from jail, and is in the process of transitioning to rehab, where she’ll be treated for meth addiction, withdrawal, and bipolar disorder.

Lindsay was released early yesterday morning, after just serving thirteen days of her ninety-day sentence, but wasn’t photographed looking like methed-out shit leaving the facility.  As of today, she probably sits in UCLA Medical Center’s rehabilitation center, because Morningside Recovery, her original destination, was found to be ill-equipped and not secure enough to handle Lindsay’s addictions star power.

Lindsay’s rehab stint is supposed to last ninety days, but her “requirements” seem more like “recommendations,” and I highly doubt she’ll be there for the next two weeks, let alone the next three months.  Come the fuck on. She didn’t even spend a third of her time in jail, for crying out loud — rehab is going to be a joke for Lohan.  She’s going to pull out her dusty, dried out acting skills and be all “healed” and “remorseful” of of her pre-jail behavior, and she’ll be out quicker than you can say drug-addled sex kitten, back to snatch shots, chipped dollar store nail polish, and Red Bull before the end of the week.  Then the LA county legal system will smile smugly and say, “Hey, this kinda stuff is our job, guys, and we take it seriously.”

6 CommentsLeave a comment

  • WTF? That meth-bipolar story was discredited yet you keep trumpeting it. Let the girl deal in private with whatever actual substance problems or mental issues she’s got. She’s out of the spotlight now, evilbeet doesn’t need to keep her in the center of the tabloids’ misogynist three ring circus. PS, “phenomena” is plural. Not even her loser father claims she has multiple personality disorder.

    • touchy little bitch, have a meth problem as well? don’t be jealous you didn’t get a job at a gossip website

  • After what that liar did to Kombucha… Synergy is still off the market, because they have to prove that drinking gourds of it won’t set off an addict’s scram bracelet. It may never come back! I hate her lying face. And I like crazy women! She just doesn’t realize the consequences of her actions. Like how thirsty she’s making me! Probiotic goodness people! C U next tuesday…

  • You know, I usually hate Sarah’s posts, but I agree with this one. (Which I’m sure makes her heart just brim with pleasures she never dreamt could exist.) While yeah, it’s unfair and cruel that this chick has to have her dirty laundry publicly aired, it’s the life she chose. And she has yet to actually really be held accountable for her actions. Sarah might be one vicious bitch but this time, I say sock it to her, tiger. Anyone that really gave a shit would commit her so she could get some REAL help.

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