Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Love It or Leave It

I see that look on your face, Gwen Stefani. That mix of repulsion for having to buy Spiderman and Elmo balloons and the self satisfaction that you have for looking so great while you do it. But you are wrong, Gwen Stefani. You don’t look great, you just look stupid. Why do those pants even exist? It just looks like a skort got confused, and skorts were confused to begin with.

It halfway looks like Spiderman is trying to punch his way off the balloon and onto your face. And I want nothing more than for him to succeed. If Spiderman knows that what you’re wearing is dumb, then you need to take a look at what you’re doing with your life, or, at the very least, your pants.

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