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19Quotables

“There’s not a better job on the planet than judging that fucking karaoke contest. It might be possible, we’ll see. They’d have to pay me a ton of dough because I already make a ton of dough.”

- Howard Stern confirming that there is a chance he could take over Simon’s seat at American Idol.

I know Kelly expressed yesterday that she’s not a huge Stern fan, but me? I LOVE Howard and I think that him becoming a judge on American Idol would be one of the best things to happen to television ever. Remember how crazy things got over at The View when Rosie took over for Meredith Vierra? You stick Howard Stern and his ego next to Ellen and her ego and Randy Jackson and whatever entitlement issues he has from being the only original remaining judge, and you’ve got yourself an explosive combo. Oh yeah, and that other chick judge who is invisible to me. She’ll still be there too. I am totally hoping this happens.

February 8, 2010 at 3:13 pm by Molls

19 Responses to “Quotables”

  1. Jay says:

    I’m not a huge Stern fan – he has his moments – but yes – this could be EXPLOSIVE! If Howard can keep his own ego/self-serving interests out of it (please no Baba Booey shit!) – he really could be pretty funny -and a major pain in Ellen’s ass. All the more reason to watch! Don’t think it’ll happen – but after Simon leaving – this show will need a serious boost – and this is it!

  2. evilbeetdouche says:

    Hey Howard, the 1990s called and said come back home to when you were relevant.

    • Anonymous says:

      Somebody’s been in a fucking coma. Anybody that makes 100 mill a year is certainly still relevant. I’m sure you’re wishing Milton Berle were still alive so he could host.

      • evilbeetdouche says:

        He suckered the Sirius radio people into a dead end contract that he knows has no chance of being renewed. But Stern hasn’t done anything meaningful in a decade. He’s living off stupid douches like the bankrupt Sirius pin heads and, oh yes, you – and you’re going to be a junior in high school next year. Future’s so bright……

        Actually, I was thinking more W.C. Fields.

      • Anonymous says:

        Well, actually he never really did anything meaningful, unless you count having strippers sit on a vibrating dong as he turns up the volume. He was never really that funny and isn’t a good host because he won’t let his guests complete a sentence. But, again, anyone that can sucker a company into paying 100 mil a year is still something I’d call relevant. And, I hated W. C. Fields. Maybe Jonathan Winters.

      • evilbeetdouche says:

        Jonathan Winters – well played Anon. I’m sure the /b/tard nation is proud.

        P.S. That would be “anyone who can sucker….” Just thought I’d save the grammar grandmas the effort.

        Douche gives you candy and slaps you at the same time.

  3. Sasha222 says:

    I agree. I think it would make great TV cause Stern doesn’t give a fuck. I’ve been a fan of his for years, and even had a psychotic kinda crush on him for a while when I was in Jr. High. I think it was the whole attracted to an asshole thing….kinda like what makes Simon semi sexy in a “tell me I’m being a ridiculous brat then throw me down on the bed and fuck me” kind of way…but thats me.

    • Anonymous says:

      Now Sasha, a little kid like you shouldn’t be saying “throw me down on the bed and fuck me”, should you? You’re one bad baby.

  4. Sarah says:

    OMG – I agree 100%. I haven’t watched Idol in years – even w/ Ellen on & I love her – but I would watch again RELIGIOUSLY if Howard were a judge.

    • evilbeetdouche says:

      Sarah, you know I love you, but there is something about Howard Stern and religion in the same sentence that makes me think about the Hell Train with you as Casey Jones.

  5. Amy says:

    He’s a prick.

  6. roger says:

    Howard is not funny just vile&dirty.that is why hi is on Sirrus.I must say though he appeals to a lot of idiots!

  7. roger says:

    meant to type he typo error haha

  8. BIGDORK says:

    He’s a big dork, but I’d love to see him clash with other big dork Ellen.

  9. blah says:

    This is just a guess, but I don’t think the producers are going to call him back considering he referred to it as a “fucking karaoke contest”. Stern has never seemed that interesting to me. He and his motley crew of scew up and ass-hats only enjoy making sex jokes and suicide attempts.

    He’s rude to his guests and is pretty degrading. His only angle is that he’s a dick like Simon but he doesn’t seem to know much about music so why bother?

  10. Think Straight says:

    Howard is stuck in a perpetually boring adolescence. And if he makes so much money, why does he need to hold out for so much more?

    Last but not least, he knows f**k-all about music, as does Ellen. So how can you have two musical ignoramuses judging musical talent?

    Besides, Howard is nothing if not a dully repetitive sexist – he’d have Karo and Ellen in a rage in a nanosecond.

    • Chuck says:

      “… he’d have Karo and Ellen in a rage in a nanosecond”. Hopefully, he would cause that effect, which would make American Idol interesting to watch again. I think “Karo” would stand up to him.

      I don’t think Ellen would have the balls to snark back on Howard.

  11. jcmtz says:

    Stern will never do a tv show, American Idol, or any tv show. He is too insecure of appearing in public without . Thats why hes locked in that studio of his. He isn’t comfortable unless someone is writing jokes for him or putting a script in front of him. He’s not a great talent, everything is written for him.

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