“Tiger Woods’ problems come from him being married. The end,” Mayer explains. “It has nothing to do with control. If Tiger Woods was a single guy, what sort of angle would there be to a text message? If Tiger Woods was single, and he texted a girl and said ‘I wanna wear your ass like a hat,’ why would that ever hit the news? I can text whatever I want to anybody in the world; I’m not married. I write a lot of dirty text messages to girls, and you’ve never seen any of them. Why? Because if a girl brought a dirty text message from me to the newspapers, they’d say ‘I don’t have an angle here. Someone wants to wear your ass like a hat? Big deal. He’s 32 years old. He’s a single guy. If John Mayer has a wife and sends dirty texts, then we got a story.’ And that’s why I won’t do that. When I get married that’s gonna be my vows, ‘Do you, John Mayer, take this woman to have and to hold, to wear her ass like headgear?’ Yes, I do—you’re the one whose ass I wanna wear like a hat for the rest of my life.”
– John Mayer in The Independent.
P.S. HAI JON MAEOR. PLZ CEND MI MOAR DURTY TECKS. K THX, BAI.