Today's Evil Beet Gossip

You Oughtta Know That I Was Pissing Myself While Watching This


I didn’t have the eleven hours it would take to watch the Grammys yesterday, so I’ve been catching up on the performances online. Overall, everyone was fine but there were a couple that really stood out to me.

Everyone knows I am probably the world’s biggest non-homosexual Beyonce fan. I worship her, and so not only am I forgiving of the fact that she skipped a few words during her cover of “You Oughtta Know”, but I’m not “No duh she skipped words! She was running around like a maniac and head-banging and actually singing!” I would expect a perfect performance of that song from someone who either doesn’t dance or doesn’t sing, but Beyonce does it all. In fact, the moments where she took a breath were the only moments when I took a breath, so thank God she did or I’d be missing even more braincells today.

But I wasn’t entirely pleased with Bey’s performance. I have never cared for “If I Was a Boy” and would have way rather seen her perform “Single Ladies (Put a Ring On It)” again.

Then Gaga. We gotta talk about Gaga. I keep thinking that I am seriously over her. I thought to myself last night “The only way that bitch is going to shock me tonight is if she comes out barefoot, refers to herself as Stephanie, and just sings a damn song while sitting on a stool.” That would be truly shocking, right? But I have to admit, there’s something about that tranny. She’s watchable. And she puts on a show.

Although, c’mon. Did she look a little bit like Marilyn Manson in the face during her performance or what?

24 CommentsLeave a comment

  • I’m sorry, I must have missed the “dancing” part in Bey’s performance…. and what was up with the storm troopers. I must have missed their “dancing” also.

  • I agree that she should have done a better song than “If I Were A Boy”. I was expecting a Janet Jackson caliber performance when she first came out w/ said ‘stormtroopers’. As for the “You Oughta Know” lyrics – those were altered on purpose b/c of their riske manor and the show is aired on network television. But I don’t think the song has the same impact w/out the in-your-face lyrics in the beginning – they set the tone for the rest of the song, which itself was an odd transition from “If I Were A Boy”. But I too ‘heart’ Beyonce and still thought she put on a hell of a performance.

      • I love If I Were a Boy, too. It is my fave Beyonce song. Such a good song.

        I work in the high stakes corporate world with nothing but men. I am always saying to myself, “If I were a boy I would be seen as assertive, smart, and a go-getter instead of a ball-grabbing bitch who gets the job done (on time and under budget to boot).” There are different rules for boys and girls. That is just a fact of life.

  • It’s obvious Beyonce stepped on her dick trying to sing “You Oughta Know”, which was proof positive of her limited ability. The only two reasons she’s famous is because she is somewhat attractive in a ‘black chick trying to look white’ sorta way and that for some fucking reason God gave studios the ability to manipulate voices of marginal black Diva singers and make it sound like they can carry a tune. The fact is, listening to an album of Aretha Franklin farting would be better than having to suffer through one song from that shrieking banshee. Even my dog was holding her ears and pleading with me to have her put to sleep if I wasn’t going to change the channel. Wake up people, wake up.

    • “black chick trying to look white”
      “listening to an album of Aretha Franklin farting”

      yes, she is a shrieking banshee -can’t listen to any song once she starts it; that said, I can listen comfortably to Rhianna, Monica and maybe Madonna if I am high enough.

      Never Beydonce, can’t, won’t – black chick trying to look white vibes don’t turn me on.

      Thank you – you hit that nail on the lacefront.

  • I like the Lady Gaga performance…and I loved when Elton John sang with her. They are kind of a match made in Bob Mackie heaven.

    It’s like she grew up watching Elton John, Billy Joel, and Warner Bros cartoons while hanging out in West Hollywood.

  • If Beyonce would just sing like a normal fucking person and not try to vibrato the shit out of every note that comes out of her mouth, she might actually sound somewhat decent. But probably not. She’s yelling AND her voice is flat. Shouting into a microphone does not a talented singer make.

    • or the head banging of the lacefornt. I guess we are supposed to think she is a hard rocker, right…..

  • could you please, please, please post the TaySwift vid? i can’t find good quality on youtube and im dyin to see her not-so-stellar (apparently) performance

  • Beyonce is a rip-off of every other artist! She doesn’t have an original idea in anything she does!

    Her dress: Lady Gaga inspired

    AM’s song: Britney did that on tour

    The only thing good was her super straight light hair!

  • When did Gaga come out as a tranny?!

    Molls, if you don’t know the meanings of words, use a dictionary. And, if you aren’t sure about the label, do your research.

  • What i can’t understand is, how come nobody’s said anything about Pink’s performance? Now THAT’s talent! She made beyonce, lady gaga, taylor swift, and even my beloved eminem, look like complete idiots with their shitty performances. So i don’t get it, why are we talking about stupid beyonce and phsyco lady gaga?…