[Ed. Note: So, I’m Sarah and I’m filling in for Molls for the remainder of the day. I’m not as cute and don’t smell as good — kidding — but I think I can clumsily take the reins well enough to satisfy your gossip-ogling pleasures. She’ll return bright and early in the morning, but until then, you’re just going to have to tolerate me hogging the blogosphere of EB Media. Enjoy!]
Michael Lohan has come forward with some serious allegations against his ex, Erin Muller. You know the one; she’s the lady that plugged him with a shoe last month. Yeah, that Mike Lohan ex.
Muller has come forward to refute his claims of abuse and to add her own special sauce to the mix. Muller claims that on several occasions, Lohan punched her in the face, slapped her, threw blunt objects at her and … aimed a swift kick to her crotch.
God. Doesn’t this douchebag know that a kick to the cooter just doesn’t hurt? What’s this guy trying to prove, anyway? What, did he think she had balls or something?
This guy’s such a twat. Really. He’s the guy that doesn’t know his ass from a hole in the ground. Yep, he’s That Guy. Even better, he’s the guy who doesn’t know the difference between himself and a twat. I always said this guy’d be kicking himself down the road — I just didn’t expect it to be so damned literal.