Gah! Why must supermodels look so fucking perfect even when they’re pregnant? Where’s the acne? Where’s the sagging rack? Where’s the vomit? Where’s the waddle? My only solace is in knowing that she’s married to Buttchin Brady.
Gisele Bundchen was snapped confidently striding up and down the streets of Boston today. While we’re at it, why is she even allowed within the state of Massachusetts? Isn’t it enough that I have to suffer while my Joint Committee on State Administration and Regulatory Oversight is meeting today to consider naming the Fluffernutter as the state sandwich? The Fluffernutter. Not a lobster roll. Not a turkey sandwich. A Fluffernutter. All this sandwich mayhem and I have to deal with Gisele Fucking Bundchen living here? Hmm … I wonder if she’ll be at the Fluff Festival 2009 this weekend.