Underneath all his swarthy, unwashed pirate swag Russell Brand is an intelligent, intuitive, incorrigible human being and for that I love him.
You see, Russell saw this supposed ‘autobiography’ put out by Miley Cyrus and he’s simply not having it.
“Miley Cyrus?” the 33-year-old star said when he was informed about her tome. “She’s only been alive half an hour. What’s she going to say: ‘The womb was warm?'”
“It’s nice in there. There’s all sorts of fluids,” he continued criticizing Miley’s tome. “That’s not a book. I don’t buy it. It’s a very short story. Anything that’s been written by a sperm and an ovum–it’s too short.”
Now, Russell may be feeling extra critical towards other autobiographies because he’s in the process of putting together his own. But his autobiography talks about things like ‘how his father introduced him to prostitutes on a trip to Asia’ and ‘how he once got into a naked, drug-fueled brawl with a stripper’. THOSE are the kinds of stories you need for a book about your life.
Who wants to read about bullies and sandwiches when you can have stripper fights and Asian hookers?