Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Amy Winehouse Contributes To Poor Property Values

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Amy Winehouse finally left St. Lucia and returned to Britain so she could check out her new digs.  Whilst she’s been away, a new house in North London has been set up for her in a continued effort to get her in a better environment.  Neighbors are not pleased that there is a new beehive in town.  One neighbor, upon hearing the news of Amy’s arrival, was quoted saying, “House prices have fallen enough without Amy Winehouse taking up residence.”  The people in her new neighborhood will never be able to sell their homes.  Amy Winehouse is an epic liability.

Not only is Winehouse an impossible neighbor, she’s even a pain in the ass at 30,000 feet.  On the flight from St. Lucia back to London, she attacked a fellow passenger that she suspected was committing the unforgivable sin of  looking at her strangely.  I don’t know what that bastard was thinking, glancing in her direction like that.  Winehouse jumped on the dude and had to be pulled off of him.

In conclusion, St. Lucia doesn’t want Amy.  North London doesn’t want Amy.  Every major airline doesn’t want Amy.

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