Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Hot Granny

According to a new article in The Daily Mail, Guy Ritchie told Madonna that she “looked like a Granny” when onstage surrounded by her young backup dancers.  I want to know what kind of family Guy Ritchie has.  Because my granny had no muscle tone, peed the couch and wore a housecoat so I’m not getting the comparison.

Guy’s father spoke to the press about Madonna.  “She is being beastly. She is saying, ‘Did you ever love me?’ It goes back to a time when she fell off her horse and she’s blaming him for that. She’s calling him an emotional retard. When he’s being bashed by her it’s horrid.” 

I don’t really care why they are divorcing.  What I do want to know is how soon after Guy and Mads called it quits did he come out of the closet and openly eat a steak or some other formerly prohibited, non-macrobiotic friendly meal?  I’m thinking within the day.  Eight years of not being allowed to eat cheese should qualify as spousal abuse and ensure a healthy alimony settlement.

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  • i feel like he probably ate steak during fights to piss her off. like i can totally see the two of them screaming at each other in the kitchen, and he pulls out this huge steak and starts gnawing on it, and is like “oh, what was that? i can’t hear you cause this HUGE STEAK is just so FUCKING GOOD.” and then she’s like, “OH, REALLY MATURE.”
    and it’s actually very, very funny.
    but wtf is that shit about the horse?

  • Frankly, I’m astonished she was able to have a relationship with anyone besides her serself for this long. Look up the word megalomaniac in the dictionary and you will see a photo of her looking into a mirror.

  • Now that she’s moving back to the States, I wonder how long it will take to lose the fake British accent?

  • “Eight years of not being allowed to eat cheese should qualify as spousal abuse” ~ Oh Wendie, you are a hoot!

  • lol. wendie. I didn’t mean to say you’re runny. I meant funny. I only repost in case you think I’m having a go at your… I don’t know, consistency or something.

  • My granny wore a housecoat, peed the couch and chewed tobacco.

    On hot days, she liked to stand in front of the fan and, um … catch a breeze by flapping her housecoat – Jeeze Louise, the fecund aroma would clear a room in 5 minutes flat.

  • I used to like Madonna and her music, but the last two albums are just terrible and this new look doesn’t work for her. It’s time for her to dress her age. She is just too old for that outfit and that makes her look even older.

  • I don’t think Guy is a horrible person like the media and most people make him out to be, he seems really friendly and he isn’t a bad director. I just don’t get why Madonna has to bash him, its like she’s trying to cling onto whatever is left of her career. Elton John was definitely right about her music being shit. She is so overrated. She can never live up to the fame she had in the past, flashing her 50 year old crotch in tights doesn’t help her look good lol

  • Hmmm tell Madonna’s sell out crowds all this! She is an extremely talented, intelligent woman that has made come back after come back. She is going to dress the way she does because she is an entertainer. Remember Cher? Its called entertainment people, it’s not like she is wearing these outfits on the street! You want her to sing slow songs, in a moo moo on stage? Christ I think she looks awesome for her age! I think she handled this divorce quite classy, she isn’t trying to cling onto whatever is left of her career, she is a millionaire people, she doesn’t need to sing anymore, she does it because she loves to entertain, and she’s damn good at it.

  • im sorry but she is SO BLOODY DISGUSTING!!! i cant even stand looking at her anymore (not that i ever could really). everything about her is just ghastly!

  • Wow, what a jackass of Guy to say something so mean. Really lowered his image in my eyes.
    I say go Madonna; she can kick about 95% of the other women her age’s asses and she knows how to work hard for what she wants. Even with her flaws, the woman has plenty of admirable characteristics.

  • She went totally overboard with the working out. She didn’t look like that when she married him. I’m not talking about normal age progression of eight years, I’m talking looks way too muscley, in fact the over-muscley no fat layer at all makes her look older than her age, and she had a lot of facial surgery which makes her look even odder.

    I would start a rule of not listening to the music of people who wear top hats, flat caps or deuche hats in public but it would leave me with nothing.