Today's Evil Beet Gossip

If I Had a Million Dollars (I’d Buy a Shitload of Cocaine)

The lead singer of Barenaked Ladies, Steven J. Page, has been charged with fourth degree criminal possession of a controlled substance, a felony. The controlled substance? Cocaine.

Police tell us that officers were patrolling the neighborhood of 311 East Genesee Street when they spotted a car that was parked across a driveway with the door open. Police stopped and checked the vehicle, which was unoccupied. The officers then checked the house and surrounding neighborhood to find the owner and if see there was any problem. Police checking the apartment building at 311 Genesee Street saw a man and a woman through a glass door sitting at a kitchen table. The officers noticed something suspicious looking on the table, and the people inside quickly covered the table with a towel when they saw police at the door. Police questioned the pair about the car outside. They also tested the substance under the towel and concluded it was cocaine.

Didn’t BNL recently release a children’s album? This oughtta help sales. Tee hee!

And on an unrelated note, you’ll all be pleased to hear that my passive-aggressive tactics have paid off. I will be attending The Dark Knight screening in Seattle tomorrow night. Woo hoo! See? Being an annoying pain in the ass does come with its rewards. Thanks Laremy and Mike!

9 CommentsLeave a comment

  • What’s the definition of “fourth degree”?

    I’ve heard of first and second degrees as they relate to crimes, but not fourth. Geez that sounds like the cop should have let him off with a warning, but needed an arrest for the night.

  • Hey Evil Beet, you’re going to give us a down and dirty review of it.. right? None of that Siskel & Ebert or Rex Reed-type PC type crap either. I want to know, should I pay my $15.00AU or not?

  • I can’t wait to see it. Also, no shit he was doing coke you didn’t think he could do all that fast singing SOBER did you?

  • Ahhh….so that’s how he lost all the weight he was sporting in the early days. Busted at a Weight Watchers meeting.

  • I don’t really “get” why you get to go to the premiere. You’re not that great of a blogger, you’ve just been around for more than half a second. Is that all it takes? I know of at least one Seattle blogger who’s writing circles around you. Catch you on the flipside when you’re on the way down and I’m on the way up.

  • hilary è carinissima!!!!!!!!!!cmq,xkè nn c’e’ un ……………… ke scrive un commento?cmq il mio nome inizia cn la z. ciao fan di avril e miley.un bacio da hilaryduff2

  • ma cocaine sign.cocaina? e si spendono 2 mil di dollari?ma siamo pazzi?di quei 2 milioni ci si potrebbe organizzare tutti quanti e rendere migliore le condizioni di un paese povero, x esempio. opp si potrebbe donare alle associazioni ke curano i malati o ke si occupano dei piccoli snz famiglia. si potrebbe fare un sacco di altre cose, anke donare una parte alla chiesa e un’altra al paese x renderlo migliore,no? io la penso cosi’, ciao ciao