Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Logic Free Arguments

Tom Cruise is Crazy

Clearly, I love when celebs say stupid things – why else why I be filling in for her majesty, Ms. Evil Beet, this week? Thankfully the gossip gods rewarded me this morning with something fun, right about here.

Let’s break this thing down.

Adam Sandler: Stop Picking on Tom Cruise

Already I’m excited and tingly.

“To see anyone’s private life invaded and mocked like this is sickening,” Adam Sandler tells PEOPLE in an exclusive statement.

Hmm, you know, I almost sort of agree with this statement. However, I’ve got to wonder, why folks aren’t invading Adam’s life? Could it be because he doesn’t go on TV as a mouthpiece for his religion? Just a thought.

Earlier this month, Andrew Morton’s scathing biography of Cruise hit shelves; meanwhile, a pro-Scientology video starring the actor hit the Internet and became the butt of jokes.

Dude, that video is INSANE. It is insane in the membrane. You simply must laugh at that, there is no other rational response. Oh, and someone wrote a book? Okay. These things tend to happen when you pull down $20m a film and run a studio.

Actually, you know what, let’s do a little test here. Ready? Go!

What do you know about Will Smith and/or Tom Hanks? When is the last paparazzi shot you saw of him? How many times has he gone on The Today show saying psychiatrists are the enemy? How many times has he bashed Brooke Shields? If you answered 1) Not much 2) I don’t recall 3) Zero and 4) Never you win! That’s right guys, you can actually be a major star in this universe AND not become the butt of jokes. How do you do it? Maintain some sense of privacy and admit that you may not have the final word on all things spirituality. Sheesh.

The drivel continues:

But many of Cruise’s friends and colleagues are not laughing. Dustin Hoffman, Cruise’s Rain Man co-star, tells PEOPLE: “Tom Cruise is an American and has the right to freedom of speech and freedom of religion.”

I love that they credit Rain Man which came out around 1975. Nice pull. Also, and I’m going to put this in CAPS because it really is crucial to this discussion:


I mean really. Dustin, no way are you that stupid. You can’t be. You only fly Quantas airlines. The fact of the matter is we’re all using our freedom of speech to point out that, at this moment, Tom Cruise is one scary dude. But as far as I know nobody has shown up and demanded he put down the Scientology pipe. You have a right to say whatever you like and everyone else has the right to ignore/ridicule you.

“Imagine having a baby and people talking about it the way they did,” says Stiller. “People lose sight of the fact that Tom Cruise is actually a person. I feel for him.”

What do you know about Ben Stiller? Nada? Yes, that’s because he hasn’t preached to you. It’s weird how people become uncomfortable with others using their fame in matters of faith. Would it be hard to be Tommy right now? Probably so. But if he just wanted to live a normal private life he could have easily done that. Instead he’s chosen to project that he has the moral highground on matters of God and religion.

Plus, no offense, he turned Katie Holmes into a robot which was SUPER uncool.

I really liked her.

As commenter Snow Ball mentions; I would be remiss if I didn’t mention Click sucked on wheels. So you watch yourself Adam.

32 CommentsLeave a comment

  • if adam sandler really cares, he will give my money back for his last five movies and promise not to make another lol

  • He is probably a down low Scientologist like Will Smith was and wants to justify the cult. I’d rather have him doing some lame ass fart jokes.

  • im just a bit sick of hearing about scientology. i dont care about any of these stars religions.. all we should be talking about is their movies, weight gain, and if theyre pregnant or not. seriously.. religion? beliefs? yawn.

  • Boo. Fucking. Hoo. You can’t just say the human race is worthless unless they’re Scientoligists and expect people to recieve this warmly. Countries have been obliterated for less.

  • Newslflash: Yes you can!
    Scientology is NOT a religion. All they do is take ‘believers’ money, get retarded celebrities to advertise the cult, and attempt to manufacture their beliefs as legit.
    Get over it.

  • Im still so confused about Scientology… what do they beleive in again? Space Aliens???? Tom Cruise fucking irriates the shit out of me. I wish I JUST WISH one day I was strolling through downtown Boston, and I happened upon him entering or exiting the Four Seasons Id just be like “DUDE DO YOU KNOW HOW BAD YOU SUCK?????” Or smear feces on him.
    (8th day of not smoking, and Im a lil violent)

  • Congratulations on your 8 days smoke free, Aurora! If it makes you feel better, bite a chunk out of Tom’s face if you wanna. You deserve it, hun.

  • “People lose sight of the fact that Tom Cruise is actually a person.” You can’t base an argument on an unproven premise.

    I did feel a little bad when people were questioning where Suri came from and all that. It seemed a little harsh. But the fact is, Tom Cruise is a giant braying jackass. And he’s not just a jackass who mumbles to himself about aliens and purple space monkeys and whatever else he believes in. No, he’s a loudmouth jackass who attacks other people and makes a spectacle of himself. So people make fun of him. He brought it on himself and continues to feed it.

    Plus, he sucks in every movie he’s in.

  • if you’re famous you gotta deal with people not liking you, so get over it.
    and if you’re tom cruise…well…it is his fucking own fault…if he kept his mouth shut people wouldnt bother….but would you please only remember what he pulled off back when he was dating katie holmes, how he had to let EVERYBODY know about that whole shit…so if he has to put himself into all this attention its his fuckin problem to deal with…so get over it tom

  • It saddens me, I use to get so excited when I heard Tom Cruise back in the early 80’s when he was a normal person, Top Gun, The Outsiders, that football movie with Lea Thompson, and now, he is a nutball!!!!!

  • I agree, Aurora. I sat through Mission Impossible 1 and 2 just for him. I don’t remember the plots, just how good he looks. Now I can’t get passed his crazy.

  • Cosign with Aurora and Persistent Cat. I loved Tom Cruise back in the day. Now he’s psychodrama and it shows before he even opens his mouth. Life changes you, no doubt, but this cult shit just ruined the Magic Man.

  • First thing I noticed was all the foundation and blush he has on in that picture. That zit is big enough to be a mole.

  • LOL! I agree with P. Cat & Samaniac… the first thing I noticed was all the makeup! Damn, it looks better than mine today!