Today's Evil Beet Gossip

This Is Getting Loony


So Scarlett took a third role in a Woody Allen film. Fine. I’ve moved past it. But don’t you dare come out and compliment this wife’s adopted daughter coveting bastard. Don’t you do it Scarlett!

Sigh. You did it.

“I’d sew the hems of his pants if he asked me to,” the actress, 22, says in the April issue of Vogue.

Yes, and he’d allow you to. You’re the requisite 40 years younger he requires. Better to drink the blood of the young you see. Woody chimes in describing her as:

“criminally sexy,” telling the magazine: “While she is a much stronger actress in every way, there is a tiny bit of Marilyn Monroe in her zaftig humidity.”

Zaftig = juicy, succulent. Nice Wood, nice. You got her right where you want her. For fun let’s look at a bonus quote from 2005 from Woody.

Allen estimated that, despite the scandal’s damage to his reputation, Farrow’s discovery of Allen’s attraction to Soon-Yi Previn, by accidentally finding nude photographs of her, was “just one of the fortuitous events, one of the great pieces of luck in my life. […] It was a turning point for the better.”

There you have it. This is a lucky dude. Also he’s a talentless hack. Go away.

3 CommentsLeave a comment

  • talentless? you’re an idiot. i know that might pale in comparison to the vitriol normally found in comments online, the reason being: I mean it with every ounce of my soul. seriously consider that for a moment and you will realize it’s true. that voice is just trying to rationalize your mind away from the inevitable, eventual conclusion it will draw. that you are, in fact, an idiot. now go back to posting nonsense about other people’s lives for the rest of yours.

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