Today's Evil Beet Gossip

I Wonder How These Are Selling?

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Just asking. How creepy is it to buy your little girl a Lindsay Lohan doll?

“I wanna be just like Lindsay. Sleep with lots of boys and look like I’m 30 by the time I turn 21. Please mommy! She is my hero! Can I go to rehab someday.”

I’m guessing mothers who buy these dolls for their daughters come from the Dina Lohan school of parenting.

Paris is a “Special Needs” Prisoner

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Paris Hilton will have until Tuesday to start her stint in jail. Even though she is “being treated like any other prisoner” she will be separated from other inmates during her stay. According to a spokesperson for the jail,

Once [Paris] arrives, the ”Simple Life” star will be housed in the jail’s ”special needs” unit. Like other inmates in the special-needs area, Hilton will take her meals in her cell and will be allowed outside the 12-foot-by-8-foot space for at least an hour each day to shower, watch TV in the day room, participate in outdoor recreation or talk on the telephone.

Ok that doesn’t sound so bad. She gets to check out some TV, maybe jog around the yard. I bet she could deal with that for 24 days.
He goes on to say,

Inmates are not allowed to bring cell phones into the jail.

Oh my god! She is going to feel naked. Honestly without the ability to send mean spirited text messages and sexually suggestive photos to her friends via her Sidekick what will she do? Can she even read if they give her a book?
Not only will Paris be without her signature cell phone she also will be without her million dollar wardrobe and hair products. I really wish that she would have to be there for a bit longer. I would love to see what those extensions would do after a couple months with no conditioning. Not only do I not think she can read but I also question if anyone has ever taught her how to brush her own hair.

Besides a decidedly unglamorous orange jumpsuit, inmates are issued a standard-issue kit that includes: a toothbrush, tube of toothpaste, soap, a comb, deodorant, shampoo and shaving implements, along with a jail-issued pencil, stationery, envelopes and stamps.

She will probably be booted out of jail in about 3 days. Those jails are so overcrowded anyway that nobody ends up staying there for too long unless they kill someone.

Fashion Victim of the Week

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Rumer Willis decided that an ill-fitting top and some leopard print palazzo pants would be a great idea. It was not a great idea as seen here. I really think that girls who have not so pretty faces need to wear long hair. The pixie thing only works for Natalie Portman-equse beauties. Rumer is getting on my nerves just a bit. She has famous parents and some famous friends but seriously is getting up there in the fug department.

Kristin Still Getting Her Swag On

Kristin Swag

Kristin Cavallari, who really has done nothing of note since her turn as a bitchy high schooler on the reality show “Laguna Beach,” is seen here at the Kari Feinstein MTV Movie Awards Style Lounge getting her swag on. I think all this girl does is show up at Hollywood parties and get bags and shoes. She did an episode of Veronica Mars, a failed reality show “Get This Party Started” some indie movie that nobody saw and is set to grace the silver screen in “Spring Breakdown” in 2008.

I am surprised that she keeps getting invited to these things. When does your Laguna fame end? Seriously people.

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Hilary Swank Kicks Off Potable Water Run

Hilary Swank Blue Planet Run

Two-time Academy Award winner and genuinely talented human being Hilary Swank did the unthinkable on Friday: she didn’t show up at Hyde. She didn’t get wasted. She didn’t get a DUI and she didn’t check into rehab. Instead, she helped kick off a round-the-world run to raise awareness of the world’s 1.1 billion people who lack access to clean drinking water. Swank was supporting Blue Planet Run, a project in which 20 runners will log 15,200 miles over 95 days. Each participant will run 10 miles at a time.

Hilary told the AP she had taken the “ordinary miracle” of clean drinking water “for granted far too many times.”

“Making safe drinking water available is everyone’s problem,” she said, “and it’s a problem it will take everyone to solve. It’s easy for me to show up today and talk about this. The real heroes are the 20 people who are actually running … and putting their lives on hold for the 95 days.”

For more about how you can help, by donating your time or your money, click here. $30 of your cash provides one person with safe drinking water to last a lifetime. That’s like the price of two beers at Hyde. You’ve got no excuse.