Today's Evil Beet Gossip

The Cast of “Celebrity Apprentice” — and We’re Using the Term “Celebrity” Loosely Here

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So here’s who we’ve got confirmed so far:

1) Omarosa. Who’s, like, a Z-list celebrity because she was on the Apprentice. ALso I think this makes her the first and only two-time Apprentice contestant.

2) Lennox Lewis

3) Gene Simmons

4) Tito Ortiz (Jenna Jameson’s boyfriend)

5) Stephen Baldwin

6) Carol Alt

7) Vinny Pastore (from The Sopranos)

8) John Cena

9) Marilu Henner

So, um, no Paris. No Lindsay. No Britney. None of the people that Donald Trump said he planned to have on the show.

This thing is gonna be such a ratings flop it’s not even funny.

I hope Rosie O’Donnell has a field day with this. It’s a pity she’s not on The View to talk about this when it crashes and burns.

Links Links Links

David Copperfield’s being investigated for raping a woman in the Bahamas. Too bad he didn’t think to make her disappear once he was done. (I know, I know. Easy joke. Sorry. Rape is not funny. But David Copperfield rape? A little funny, guys. Admit it.) [Celebslam]

T.I.’s not getting out of jail just yet. [Bossip]

Hilary Duff shakes her ass. [The Blemish]

Check out the Eva Mendes sex scene from We Own the Night. [Ninja Dude]

Ah, the Lindsay Lohan side-boob. How we missed thee. [Drunken Stepfather ]

Scarlett Johansson is a good person. [Derek Hail]

Shar Jackson may not have won Kevin Federline, but she did win Celebrity Rap Superstar. [Cele|bitchy]

I Wanna Be Chelsea Clinton’s Best Friend!

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From Page Six:

THE anticipated presence of Chelsea Clinton and her parents at an Oct. 27 wedding in Washington, D.C., has the planners in a tizzy. Chelsea’s childhood best friend, Nicole Davison, is marrying hedge-fund analyst Michael Fox. Chelsea, the maid of honor, will be there with her parents. Guests are being warned not to bother Bill and Hillary Clinton. When the ex-president hosted the couple’s engagement party at his Chappaqua home, some guests were told to be on their “best behavior” and avoid talking to the family about inappropriate topics.

Um, Bill Clinton? Will you please host my engagement party, too? I just think it would be fun. And expensive. I promise I’ll be nice to Chelsea and not make fun of her for having to spend her most awkward years in the White House.

Amy Winehouse Finally Got Her Punk Ass Arrested

Amy Winehouse Arrested in Norway for Marijuana Use

From the AP:

British singer-songwriter Amy Winehouse was arrested in Norway for marijuana possession and held overnight, a police official said Friday.

Winehouse, her husband Blake Fielder-Civil and a third person were released at around 7:00 a.m. Friday after paying $715 in fines, Prosecutor Lars Morten Lothe said.

The trio were arrested shortly after 6 p.m. at a hotel in Bergen in southwestern Norway, where Winehouse is on a European tour, after a tip to police.

“They were found with seven grams (about 1/4-ounce)of marijuana,” Lothe said. “She’s paid the fine, so this thing is over for us now.”

Damn, I wanna smoke weed in Norway.

In the U.S., it’s a little more complicated, isn’t it? I’m not a weed person, and I’ve never been arrested for it, so I’m not really sure. Anyone around here been caught with a quarter-ounce of weed in another country? Did you get off this easy?

Even More Quotables

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“We’re taking power from the word. No disrespect to none of them who were part of the civil rights movement, but some … in the streets don’t know who (civil rights activist) Medgar Evers was … they know who Nas is. And to my older people who don’t know who Nas is and who don’t know what a street disciple is, stay outta this motherfucking conversation. We’ll talk to you when we’re ready. Right now, we’re on a whole new movement. We’re taking power from that word.”

Nas, whose upcoming album will be controversially titled Nigger. (Hey, the kids at Bossip printed it, so I can too!)

There’s a ton of really powerful stuff in this MTV interview with him. In fact, I’ve put the whole thing after the jump. It’s just that damn important.

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Britney’s Still a Moron

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I don’t have it in my to summarize or be snarky about these stories anymore, but it’s my job to bring them to you.

TMZ has learned that Britney Spears stood up her parenting coach yesterday, and apparently, it’s the last straw for the coach.

Sources say Britney had a scheduled time to meet the coach yesterday at her Malibu home. The coach made the trek, but no Britney.

We’re told during the hearing earlier this week, the coach phoned in and asked the Commissioner if she could end the home visits, presumably because they were going nowhere. Seems like Britney was ignoring the coach — like everyone else who gives her advice.

Are they still making those Team Federline shirts?

Quotables

Isla Fisher Gives Birth to Baby Girl

“There is no way I am going to worry about missing out on work or the pressure to lose weight. At the moment I am not even planning any work. As far as I am concerned I am fully booked up in my personal life and I can’t see beyond that. I plan on just colouring in books. I’ll focus on that for the next few years.”

Isla Fisher, who gave birth to a baby girl on Wednesday night. The baby daddy is her fiance, Sacha Baron Cohen (aka Borat).