Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Comparing Notes on Brody Jenner’s Penis: Nicole Richie and Lauren Conrad Are Friends Now

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There should really be some manner of Brody Jenner Slept with Me to Be Famous club. Instead of giving out free toasters, they could give out reality TV shows. Or a 4-week stay at Promises. Either works.

Lauren Conrad and Nicole Richie — who have both been linked to Brody, along with the rest of Hollywood — are apparently all buddy-buddy now, lunching together at Joan’s last week, and getting sushi together on Sunday night.

Get ready to see Nicole’s baby on The Hills, kids.

Blind Item!

WHICH struggling starlet is as obnoxious and stuck-up in real life as she is in her terrible teen flicks? She was rude and cruel to the staff and to a young fan during a free meal she chowed down at a high-end Midtown restaurant.

[source]

More Quotables

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“It’s been a very interesting year. I’ve learned many lessons, like no more phones. In New York I’m the bad girl, I’m the good girl, I’m a controversial girl, and I’ve been through so much in this city. I’m a recovering addict and alcoholic, of which I’m not ashamed.”

Rehabbed supermodel Naomi Campbell, at the 37th annual scholarship and awards dinner for the Black Action Retail Group.

Jewel’s Back, and Not with a Book of Poetry

Jewel Kilcher to Release Country Album, Signed with Valory Music Company

Thank God for small favors.

Jewel’s special brand of angst is coming to the country world!

She’s signed with a country label and plans to pursue life on the country charts.

“If I had been discovered now, living in my car in San Diego, I think I would have been signed as a country act,” she says. “As a singer/songwriter and as a storyteller, I’m old fashioned. I like a beginning middle and end to my songs. That’s pretty much just country radio now.”

Seriously, Jewel, you haven’t been living in your car for like 20 years now. You’ve been living on a sprawling ranch with a male model. Can we move on?

Quotables

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“Although I lost by the slimmest margin in presidential election history — only 10 votes — I have chosen not to put the country through another agonizing Supreme Court battle. It is time for this nation to heal.”

Stephen Colbert, whose request to run in the 2008 presidential election was barred by the South Carolina Democratic Executive Council, which voted last week to keep the host of “The Colbert Report” off the state’s primary ballot. The vote was 13-3.

Sad!!!

2012!!!

The Writers’ Strike Is Happening and Jon Stewart Rocks (Maybe)

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Members of the Writers Guild of America went on strike early this morning.

The shows most impacted are news-centric talk shows, like The Daily Show and The Colbert Report.

There are rumors that Jon Stewart has decided not only to support the writers’ strike, but to pay his staff through his production company, Busboy Productions. His rep denies it, but the rumors persist.

It’ll be interesting to see how this all plays out.