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16Melissa Joan Hart to Star in Potty Training Video

Dude, how awesome would it be if this video was about potty training Melissa Joan Hart?

And they could market it to those fetishists who are all about getting crapped on?

Please, please, please someone do that spoof.

Nah, the actress is going to star in a potty training DVD for Kimberly-Clark, the makers of Pull-Ups training pants. Kimberly-Clark will be distributing the DVD for June Potty Training Awareness Month (????) and inviting people to follow Melissa’s progress in potty training son Mason through an online journal and video diary at

“When Mason first showed signs that he was ready to use the potty, my husband and I were really excited and — more than anything — proud,” Hart said in a statement. “Potty training is one of the first times I’ll be able to act as a teacher to my son, and that adds a little pressure. I’ve teamed up with the Pull-Ups brand to share my experience and learn from their expertise and resources, which I hope will inspire other parents and let them know they aren’t alone if they have questions.”

Hey, remember when Melissa Joan Hart was a famous actress?

No, me neither.

May 29, 2008 at 5:03 pm by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Uncategorized

22Uh, Christina? This Has to Stop.

Once again, Christina Aguilera was spotted stumbling out of a Hollywood hot spot. The new mom needed two people to help her walk from the Hotel Bel Air to her car.

Like, Christina? This is fine once in awhile, but it’s becoming a pretty regular occurrence, sweetie, and that’s not good for a new mom. Have you seen Nicole Richie out drunk even once since she had her kid on like the exact same day you had yours? No, you haven’t. And I cannot fucking believe I am telling someone to take maturity cues from Nicole Richie, but, yeah. That’s what I’m doing. That’s what it’s come to, Christina. Cut this out, girl. It makes you look awful.

May 29, 2008 at 3:15 pm by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Uncategorized

30Pete Wentz: Why I Lied

Petey Pete Wentz explains why he lied about Ashlee’s pregnancy until she was out of her first trimester, in an email to MTV News.

Every woman, no matter who they are or what they do for a living, has the right to wait at least 3 months before sharing this very personal news. We wanted to wait until after the first trimester and get a clean bill of health from our doctors before confirming anything, just like any other couple.

Being a boy I have no idea how to respond to such things and my first instinct was to protect her and the baby.

It’s insane that you can’t let happy news brew in Hollywood. This wasn’t about press or anything. It was about the health of the baby and trying to find a way to be happy with what should be the most happy time of our lives in the middle of a press blitz. I apologize to anyone who felt misinformed but the truth is, the person and growing baby is who I felt most loyal to protect and defend.

Yeah, yeah. Unfortunately, I agree with Pete here.

May 29, 2008 at 3:07 pm by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Uncategorized

42Wanna Play Some Sex and the City Trivia???

The inimitable Marta over at RealNetworks put together this fantastic Sex and the City trivia quiz.

Okay, okay, I helped a little. And by “helped” I mean I sat in her office playing with Leo while she did all the work, and I was totally blown away by all her SatC knowledge. She’s a Sex and the City genius!!!! These are tough questions. I’m interested to see how you all do.

Click here to play!

May 29, 2008 at 2:57 pm by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Uncategorized

10Lindsay Lohan’s Big 22nd B-Day Bash is Canceled

Ah, this makes me feel much better that the guy never wrote me back about Evil Beet’s official sponsorship of Lindsay Lohan’s birthday party. Because, like, I would have been happy to cash out my retirement savings for a shot at this.

Lindsay Lohan’s big 22nd birthday party has been canceled.

Sources say that Linds was pushed by her management and publicity team to cancel the party because of all the recent bad press surrounding her. They were also having trouble attracting “corporate brands.”


Evil Beet is an LLC!!!!! We would have done it!!!!!!

Lindsay’s management team missed out on a huge opportunity. I was going to throw her the bestest birthday party ever! I was gonna rent out a Peter Piper Pizza and get balloons and hats and cocaine and everything!

May 29, 2008 at 2:52 pm by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Uncategorized

15Don’t Worry, Kids, Clay Aiken Didn’t Have Sex with a Woman

There’s a lot of talk today about the fact that Clay Aiken is going to be a daddy.

I can’t emphasize this fact enough: the woman was artificially inseminated with his sperm. He did not put his penis in a vagina. That would have just turned my whole world upside-down.

Clay’s baby mama is 50-year-old Jaymes Foster, a record producer and Clay’s alleged “best friend.”

Word on the street is that Aiken will have an active role in raising the child, which is adorable.

May 29, 2008 at 1:56 pm by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Uncategorized