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15Kate Moss Needs Her Bathroom Helpers

Poor Kate Moss needs lots of friends to help her go potty.

Or so it would seem.

Kate left an Agent Provocateur event in NYC because she was told there was a strict one-person-at-a-time rule for the bathroom. Kate wanted to bring three of her friends in with her.

“But I’m hosting the event!” she complained. The bathroom attendant didn’t budge. At that point, Kate said “Forget it” and walked away.

You know how some people are pee-shy? Like, they can’t pee when someone’s watching them? I think Kate Moss is the opposite of pee-shy. She simply cannot urinate unless there are a minimum of three people there to watch her.

Or, you know, she wanted to do cocaine with her friends in the bathroom.

But that’s kind of a stretch.

June 9, 2008 at 1:58 am by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Kate Moss

13Everyone’s Mean to Ali Lohan

This week’s episode of Living Lohan focused on the fact that Ali was the target of “mean girls” at her school. And in her neighborhood. They’re all juss jealous, of course.

The cure?

Dina Lohan dragging Ali’s ass to some inner-city performing arts program where a bunch of black kids sing their hearts out about their awful home lives and Dina’s eyes tear up. This was, according to Dina, so that Ali could hang out with other kids who are “going through the same thing” as Ali. Which doesn’t make any sense at all. What these kids are going through has absolutely nothing to do with what Ali is going through. I don’t know why she couldn’t have just been like “I want Ali to see this so that she understands how good she has it, and how some people sing and dance as a form of passionate, healthy, imperative expression and not to guarantee themselves a VIP table at Goa stocked with Grey Goose and cocaine.” That would have been totally acceptable. But to imply that the problems these kids face have anything to do with the fact that Ali is being occasionally and non-violently teased by girls at her suburban high school is just insane.

It’s like, if my daughter’s contact lens fell out one day at school and she couldn’t find it and got all upset, I wouldn’t make her spend a day at a school for blind kids in the hopes that she could find someone there to relate to in her struggle. Just saying.

Dude, did I have a point?

Not really.

But what I think is funny? All those girls yelling at Ali to go visit her sister in rehab?

Will probably be in rehab themselves one day.

That level of teenage insecurity just screams future drug abuse.

June 9, 2008 at 12:18 am by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Uncategorized

16Hey, Denise, You Know Who HATES Red Carpet Events????

That’s right: YOUR DAUGHTER!

Samantha Sheen is never, ever, ever happy at this shit.

NEVER.

This weekend was no different, as Denise dragged poor Sam unwillingly into the spotlight at the Elizabeth Glaser Pediatric AIDS Foundation fundraiser. She is smiling in none of the pictures from this event, just like she never, ever smiles at these events. Because she is miserable. Because you would be too if Denise Richards was your mother. Who keeps dragging you into the spotlight when you just want to sit at home and be normal.

CUT THIS OUT, DENISE!!!

[Image via Splash]

June 8, 2008 at 9:23 pm by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Uncategorized

36Your Daily Lohan

Lindsay Lohan hit up the Roosevelt Hotel on Sunday to meet up with Samantha Ronson, cigarette in hand.

What’s with the shoes?

Are we showing our support for the Native American hookers of this country, Lindsay?

June 8, 2008 at 9:16 pm by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Uncategorized

12Daddy’s Little Girl

What’s the best way to help the world forget about the fact that you were captured on tape singing about “gooks” and “nips”?

Make a very public appearance holding your daddy’s hand!

Amy Winehouse had dinner in London last night with her father Mitch.

WHY ARE YOU TAKING HER TO DINNER, DUDE???

TAKE HER TO REHAB!!!!

THEY HAVE FOOD THERE, TOO!

June 8, 2008 at 9:06 pm by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Uncategorized

4Jessica Alba Has a Baby Girl

We told you guys that Jessica was spotted being wheeled into Cedars-Sinai this weekend, and now reports are confirming that the actress has welcomed a baby girl.

Congrats, Jessica and Cash!

June 8, 2008 at 8:59 pm by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Uncategorized