Today's Evil Beet Gossip

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Usher is officially going to be a daddy! [Bossip]

Kelly Clarkson really ought to avoid the midriff-bearing shirts for awhile. [POTP]

Best and worst beach bodies. [popbytes]

Heh. The rider for Justin Timberlake’s tour specifies Beano. [A Socialite's Life]

Daisy Fuentes rocks the bikini. [Drunken Stepfather]

Victoria Beckham’s closet cost $500,000. No, not the clothes in the closet. The closet. [Allie]

Dita Von Teese says Marilyn Manson’s needy. [Celebrity Smack]

PETA crowns the sexiest vegetarians. [Cele|bitchy]

Paris Hates Lindsay

Paris and Lindsay are Over

I know we’re not talking about it… but did anyone catch the cold shoulder LL got from our gal?

Larry King asked about Lohan and Paris said curtly “I know her.” Then, Larry King asked if Paris would visit a friend in rehab and Paris responded “I don’t have any friends in rehab.” Yikes. You hate to see friendships sour. Luckily Paris still has much love for B-Spears.

Lastly, the funniest comment of the night was Larry King’s outro: “Thanks for joining us Paris. Tomorrow night, former Secretary of State Colin Powell is on the show.” Frankly, I don’t know how Larry made that transition without killing one of his producers.

Paris Hilton: I’ve Never Done Drugs

Paris Hilton Told Larry King She’d Never Done Drugs But Here’s a Photo of Her Smoking Weed

Honestly, after she said that, I stopped caring about this interview.

It’s not that I expect Larry King to play hardball with her, but that was just a blatant lie that I can’t believe Larry let her get away with.

She was asked several times by Larry if she’d ever done drugs. “No,” she responded. When pressed, Paris stuck to her story. She didn’t hesitate a bit.

Really, Paris? Never? You’re quite sure about that?

She also told Larry she rarely drinks, and blames her “social life” on the fact that she’s an Aquarius.

Paris Hilton Tells Larry King on CNN That She Doesn’t Do Drugs But Here’s a Picture of the Marijuana in Her Purse Paris Hilton Tells Larry King on CNN That She Doesn’t Do Drugs But Here’s a Picture of Her Smoking a Joint Paris Hilton Tells Larry King on CNN That She Doesn’t Do Drugs But Here’s a Photo of Her Smoking a Pipe in an Elevator

Wait a Second, There’s a War in Iraq Still?

MSNBC’s Mika Brzezinski put a prettier face on the point Rosie O’Donnell is trying to make: there are currently news stories that actually impact the lives of people whose last name isn’t Hilton. It’s just that no one is paying attention to them.

Ms. Brzezinski basically loses it in her morning newscast, refusing to lead with a story about Paris Hilton. At one point, she has to be stopped from lighting her paper copy of the story on fire. I love it. Now that’s a newsworthy story: MSNBC studio burns to the ground; Paris Hilton to blame.

I Came Closer to Dying from Laughing at This Picture of Sheriff Lee Baca Than Paris Hilton Ever Came to Dying of Anything in Jail

Sheriff Lee Baca, Shirtless Hottie

Big, huge, enormous props to Celebslam for tracking down this photo of Sheriff Baca.

The Sheriff was grilled once again about why he decided Paris needed to leave jail after like 10 minutes, and he was like, “Our doctors said we had no solution to Hilton’s medical problems. None. As a sheriff in this county, I’m not going to let any inmate die in this jail.”

Jesus Christ, what did she have? The plague?

Even Paris was all like, “The doctors were observing me while I was there. They explained to Sheriff [Lee] Baca that they thought I was having severe anxiety, panic attacks, claustrophobia.”

Baca went on to say that “everyone who goes in to serve county jail time is early released. If Ms. Hilton got preferential treatment, it’s that she spent more time in the county jail than the average inmate.”

I think that if Paris had been released with that sort of statement, there would probably have been less backlash. If the Sheriff had just been, like, “Look, this is pretty routine. Paris is a low-risk, non-violent offender, and it doesn’t make any economic sense to keep her here when we have high-risk, violent felons who need cages, so we’re releasing her early and putting her on house arrest, like we do in all of these cases,” people may have been less outraged. I know I would have. It probably would have helped me be a little less outraged if the Hiltons hadn’t contributed to Baca’s most recent campaign, but that’s a different story.

I Guess Eating All Those Wieners isn’t Good For You

hot-dog.jpg

To all those out there who dream of being the Coney Island Hot Dog Eating Champ. Competitive eating has its consequences.

Takeru Kobayashi of Japan, the hot-dog eating champ of New York City’s Coney Island has been diagnosed with arthritis of the jaw. According to a message he sent his fans on his website,

“Already I can’t open my jaws more than just a little bit. There’s no pain only if I open my mouth about enough for one finger. More than that is painful and I can’t open it. To tell the truth, I’m desperate about healing completely before the July 4 contest”

Fans need not worry that their won’t be a wowing wiener champ. Already Joey Chestnut, 23, of San Jose, Calif., beat Kobayashi’s world record in a Coney qualifying event, the Southwest Regional Hot Dog Eating Championship at the Arizona Mills Mall, by eating 59.5 hot dogs in 12 minutes. The record that Kobayashi set last year was 53.75 wieners in 12 minutes.

I’m sure the Mustard Belt will go to a dynamic Wiener winner. I feel sorry for Kobayashi…kind of funny however that he has paralized his jaw by eating too many wieners. I know some girls that I went to college with that had the same problem.

[source]