Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Rumer Willis Has a Very Flat Stomach

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Why do I care about Rumer Willis?

Why do you?

What does she do?

Why do I run her picture when it shows up?

It’s not like it’s a slow news week. It’s only Monday, and already Owen Wilson’s tried to off himself, Nick Hogan nearly killed himself drag-racing, and a bigot Idaho senator got caught in “lewd” bathroom acts with another man.

And yet, I feel moved to run this new picture of Rumer Fucking Willis at the LG House in Malibu. I think I’m fascinated by the flatness of her stomach. I have to share it with all of you.

I just want to say, for all of you commenters out there who feel obliged to mention that I need to get a life, and that it’s really sad that this is what I do/think about all day: I know. I know that, guys.

More Details About Owen Wilson’s Suicide Attempt

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Update: Wilson had an unlikely hospital visitor: Samuel L. Jackson! Check out video here.

This is the path Lindsay Lohan’s on!

The Insider is reporting that Owen Wilson, who attempted suicide on Sunday, has a history of depression and drug and alcohol abuse. He spent time in the Hazeldon rehab center in Minnesota seven years ago.

Owen’s stayed sober and healthy for awhile, but apparently recently he’s fallen off the wagon and, now, into a hospital (where he’s in good condition).

I remember back when he was dating Kate Hudson, reports surfaced about he, Kate and brother Luke tossing back shots at an LA bar. I didn’t run the story. I thought to myself at the time, “This must be made up — I thought he was clean and sober.” But maybe they were the truth…

Why on earth would his brother be tolerating him drinking if he knew he had a problem?

And why would Kate?? She has yet to comment about any of this. She’s been linked recently to Dax Shephard, and photos surfaced earlier this month of the two of them sucking face.

There will certainly be much more to come of this story …

Links Links Links

You can’t legally sleep with half the people who showed up at the Teen Choice Awards, but it sure is nice to look anyway. [Drunken Stepfather]

Paris Hilton and Kid Rock are getting a little too close for comfort. [Celebslam]

Things are still happening with Madonna’s adoption of David Banda that happened 100 years ago. Seriously this kid must be old enough to be legally emancipated by now. Why does anyone still care? [Cele|bitchy]

Breaking: Renee Zellweger is skinny! [Holy Candy]

Having successfully kicked off the careers of eight zero supermodels, Cycle 9 of America’s Next Top Model is ready to get started. [popbytes]

Jennifer Aniston’s bikini, much like her career, is just hanging on by a thread. [Agent Bedhead]

Nobody liked The Nanny Diaries. [Pajiba]

I don’t know who Sarah Harding is but this is one amazing nip slip? [SOW]