Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Make Your Own “Piece of Me” Video

Britney did such a crappy job of her own video, her label’s giving you a shot at it!

They’ve launched the Britney Video Remixer, where you can create your very own video for “Piece of Me” using existing videos and photos of Brit-Brit. The options are kind of limited, but it’s still fun to play around with.

The winning video will air on TRL.

But what the fuck does TRL know?

Send us your remixes, and we’ll run our faves on here!

The Evil Beet remix (which, admittedly, sucks) is here.

Yes, Jennifer Love Hewitt, They’re Paparazzi

Jennifer Love Hewitt in Los Angeles

And ever since that whole “fat” thing exploded (no pun intended), they care about you! Yes! They’re taking your picture again!

Being called fat by people like me was the best thing that’s happened to your career since Party of Five! So you’re welcome.

And I know I promised I wouldn’t call you fat anymore — and I actually think you look nice here — but that doesn’t prevent me from pointing out the fact that you have bedazzled jeans. Really, Jen? Those are unnecessary.

Jennifer Love Hewitt Has Bedazzled Jeans

Yes, We Know the Site’s Been Down a Lot Today

I am so, so, so sorry about this.

But we’re growing!!! STILL!!! And the great big huge server we switched over to just a few months ago can’t handle the traffic anymore, so we’re moving to a great big HUGER server tomorrow afternoon (hopefully — Thursday at the latest). There should not be any down time during the switch (hopefully).

This should resolve the issues you guys have been seeing lately.

Thank you all SO SO SO much for your loyal readership. I can’t tell you how much it means to me.

xoxo,
Beet

There’s One Man Who’s Always in Kate Hudson’s Life

Kate Hudson and Son Ryder in a Stroller in Manhattan

Honestly, I can’t ever keep track of who this woman is dating, and it’s my full-time job. Last I heard it was Dax Shephard, but then maybe I heard they broke up, and now she’s probably having sex with Tony Romo, because that seems to be the thing to do these days.

Anyway.

No matter who Kate’s banging, she’s always taking time out to spend with her son, Ryder. Here she is taking him for a stroll (literally!) in NYC.

Kate Hudson Face Close Up Kate Hudson’s Son Ryder in Stroller Face Picture Close-Up

Image via Splash

Cyndi Lauper Has a Helium Habit

Cyndi Lauper Sucks on Helium Before Performances

Oh, aging is such a sad process.

The saggy boobs. The flabby vagina. The menopause. The weight gain. The lowering of your annoyingly squeaky voice.

Fortunately, Cyndi Lauper’s found a cure for the last item.

Pop survivor Cyndi Lauper has one of the most unusual pre-performance warmups.

An amused source backstage at last week’s benefit for the Hetrick-Martin Institute said she sucked the gas out of two helium balloons, to create her trademark squeaky voice, before belting out hits like “Time After Time.”

Something tells me it’s not just before shows that this woman’s sucking on helium …