Earlier this week, I was down at the mall, and in one of the store windows, I saw a onesie. For real. And no, it wasn’t at Baby Gap or Gymboree, not at all, it was at the Forever 21. A onesie. For an adult. This kind of thing has got to stop. Rompers need an age limit, Ashley Greene needs to fade into even more obscurity, and I need a drink.
Buckle in, everybody, it’s going to be a real fun weekend.
Can I tell you guys something that’s just going to blow your mind? Lindsay Lohan
and Paris Hilton have a total of seven mugshots between the two of them. Isn’t that just unfathomable?
I had a whole slew of presumably witty things to say about this entire ordeal, but the fact of seven mugshots between two of the trashiest women in Hollywood – hanging out together! Embracing! Merrily consuming libations! – has got me so thrown that I don’t even know what to say. The combined powers of Lindsay and Paris has rendered me speechless, probably for the first time in my life.
“He had a rough childhood, so to see what he’s become from there, it’s amazing. That’s why I wanted the picture of him as a child, to capture that certain innocence. It was good having him beside me while we finished. The tattoo is a way of him recognizing somebody loves him.”
Kat Von D, on the topic of her most recent tattoo – a rendering of her ex-boyfriend’s face as a child. I mean, I’m not going to touch the “[amazing] to see what he’s become from there part,” because I don’t want to turn this post into a rude one out of respect for someone who’s apparently hurting over something that someone did (even though it’s not, you know, entirely surprising, based on the history there), but it’s sad to see that Von D is so publicly grieving her relationship with Jesse. Her pain, though incomprehensible, is evidently real, and that just further reinforces my idea of Jesse James as a total toolkitting, douche-nozzling waste of skin and teeth.