Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Who’s Hotter: Jason Schwartzman or Adrien Brody

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The two of them showed up in Beverly Hills last week to do a press conference for their upcoming Wes Anderson film, The Darjeeling Limited, which also stars Owen Wilson (but you can’t vote for him) and Natalie Portman (who is clearly hotter than any of these people).

So I’m looking through these pictures trying to decide which of them I should focus this post on. “Who’s hotter?” I asked myself. “Jason Schwartzman or Adrien Brody?” And what I decided is that I’m not sure. So I’m putting it to you guys. Let me know.

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Scarlett Johansson Is Seriously Coming Out with an Album of Tom Waits Covers

Scarlett Johansson Releasing Album of Tom Waits Covers

A part of me wanted to believe she was joking about that, but, if it’s a joke, she’s still running with it.

She’s been doing promotion for The Nanny Diaries, and recently did an interview with the AP about her upcoming projects. Says Scarlett:

I’ve always been a huge fan of Tom Waits and I had this kind of golden opportunity to make an album however I wanted and it’s kind of a dream chance. … Originally I thought that I would do an album of standards and I wanted to include a Tom Waits song. And I don’t know, I thought maybe everybody does standards, and so, I see Tom Waits as being kind of a composer of modern standards and so it seemed appropriate that I could interpret his songs. Obviously, it’s not an album where I’m trying to sound like him. It would be impossible. He writes such beautiful songs and incredible melodies and they’re so cinematic and kind of open-ended so I felt like it would be something that I could be inspired by.

She was asked if she considered herself Woody Allen’s new muse, and responded with:

We both kind of think that term is so bizarre. You know, it’s not like I come bring him inspiration when he’s got writer’s block at 3 in the morning. We like to work together. It’s an easy working relationship and a really nice friendship, so it works out. But I don’t know if it goes much further than that.

And as to whether or not the 22-year-old will continue to avoid DUIs and jail time:

I don’t think necessarily that there’s trouble looming around the corner for everyone involved in this industry. … I have a really wonderful family that’s very supportive. Luckily I never really struggled with any kind of, I don’t know, image problems or addictions. You know, I think it’s not just people in Hollywood … It’s kind of part of just growing up and growing up in the world that we live in today where everything is so available and so fast-paced. It’s hard I think for a lot of youths to avoid these pitfalls. Obviously the availability of whatever it may be, whether it’s drugs or alcohol or partying or whatever, is dangerous for people who are prone to addiction or that kind of lifestyle. I’m just fortunate enough to never have had that inclination. I guess I attribute that to my parents and friends and the way I was raised.

Carey Hart Says Everything’s Fine with Pink Marriage

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Rumors swirled last week that motorcrosser/tattoo parlor owner/reality TV star/husband of Pink Carey Hart was cheating on his woman.

“He had a cute blonde in a tight dress sitting on his lap all night. They were laughing and drinking vodka with her arms wrapped around him in a corner VIP booth,” a source told Star Magazine.

Now Carey is fighting back against the rumors.

It’s “just a bunch of trash talk,” he tells the Las Vegas Review-Journal. “It’s just a nasty rumor. Everything’s fine.”

See, I don’t buy this. Why on earth would people be planting nasty rumors about Carey Hart? No one really cares about him, or about Pink, anymore. No one has any reason to make this shit up. It’s just barely interesting. If anyone planted this rumor, it was Carey and Pink.

Lindsay Lohan is Getting Off EASY

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Paris Hilton has got to be pissed.

Whereas Lindsay Lohan should have been looking at years in jail following her summer string of DUIs, the LA district attorney charged her with a seven misdemeanors, and no felonies.

She’s been charged with two counts of driving under the influence, driving with a blood-alcohol level above .08 percent and being under the influence of cocaine and one count of reckless driving.

Says a law enforcement source: “Prosecutors in this county see a lot of kids in crisis. There are lots of kids struggling with addiction. The first sign of trouble usually involves a car. We’re not going to throw every one of them in prison. It doesn’t make sense.”

It seemed to make perfect sense with Paris Hilton!

Why not Lindsay Lohan?

Is it because Paris didn’t immediately check into rehab?

Probably.

You should have gone to rehab, Paris!!! It would have been nicer than your jail stay!

Paris Hilton Settles Lawsuit with Diamond Heiress

Paris Hilton Settles Lawsuit with Diamond Heiress Zeta Graff

The on-going feud between Paris Hilton and Zeta Graff, the ex-girlfriend of Paris Latsis (who is Paris Hilton’s former fiance … are you following all this?) will have to continue outside of a courtroom. Paris decided to settle Graff’s lawsuit against her just as the trial was getting started.

Just a day before jury selection was scheduled to begin in diamond diva Zeta Graff’s much-anticipated defamation suit against the hotel heiress, Paris forked up enough cash to settle the case. Sources pegged the damage at north of $2 million. In the suit, Graff alleged that Hilton planted a story on Page Six two years ago which falsely claimed a jealous Graff – the ex-girlfriend of Paris Latsis – had ripped a necklace off Hilton’s neck and been thrown out of London nightclub Kabaret, while Barry Manilow’s “Copacabana” played mockingly in the background. Graff’s lawyer, Michael Avenatti, said, “Both parties are glad the matter could be resolved without the time and expense of a trial.”

In what is perhaps the funniest part of this whole story, the Page Six article continues with the following: “We at Page Six are just glad the matter was resolved without our editor being forced to recite the lyrics of Manilow’s hit song in court, as he did in a deposition.”

Now there’s a video I hope ends up on YouTube.