4A Day in the Life of Paris Hilton, Brought to You by Taco Bell

Does Paris Hilton really need to walk into the Taco Bell? Don’t they all have a drive-thru? Does she really need to ponder solemnly over the menu? Honestly, Paris, save some of that solemn pondering for all that humanitarian work you totally forgot you said you were going to do.

No, Paris Hilton doesn’t need to make an entire photo op out of a trip to Taco Bell. But she did anyway. Probably because Taco Bell’s paying her to, and possibly just because she thinks it’s funny.

Regardless, I want a chalupa right now.

July 18, 2007 at 1:31 pm by Evil Beet

0Let Me Get That For Ya

This is twisted and quite amusing. I am a big fan of the Sans Pants fellows. For more of their funny check out their website www.sanspantsproductions.com

They are also big fans of the Beet. We like fans.

July 18, 2007 at 1:23 pm by EvilT

26Lindsay and Samantha Ronson: Together Again?

Lindsay Lohan and BFF/on-and-off lesbian lover Samantha Ronson are wasting no time in celebrating Lindsay’s release from rehab and SamRo’s new, even butcher, haircut. While World War III was kicking off over at Hyde, Lindsay and Samantha were both spotted at Les Deux (the photos are from last night). Lindsay later met up with friends at Mel’s Diner in WeHo. SamRo didn’t appear to make the trip.

Photo credit: Buzz Foto

July 18, 2007 at 1:18 pm by Evil Beet

10CSI Star Lashes Out at TMZ Photog

Well, this is one way to get your name in the papers.

CSI star Gary Dourdan went apeshit on a TMZ photographer outside Hyde, beating him violently after mistaking him for someone else. You can check out video of the event here. According to TMZ:

Clad in leather biker gear, Dourdan violently grabbed our photog outside Hyde, who the actor had mistaken for another guy, and slammed him to the pavement several times, sending his head bouncing into concrete over and over again — all while his camera continued to roll.

The chaos began after Dourdan pulled up to the club on his Ducati motorcycle, and shouted at the photog to “get that f**king camera out of my face!” The photog obliged, pointing the camera to the ground — but Dourdan’s rage continued to grow, and the cameraman kept the record button on just in case something happened. Moments later, something happened.

As Dourdan launched his attack, other paparazzi can be heard screaming at Gary, desperately trying to make him stop. Moments after the assault, Dourdan threatened our photog again, saying, “I know all the cops around here, they’re my friends.”

Not very cool, Mr. Dourdan. If you don’t want photogs in your face, don’t fucking go to Hyde.

July 18, 2007 at 1:10 pm by Evil Beet

6Bunny Andre?

Katie Price (aka Jordan) and Peter Andre have finally named their new baby girl….Bunny.

I am all for crazy celebrity names but are you supposed to give a baby a porn star name? Can you imagine “paging Dr. Bunny Andre?” More like “Bunny Andre XXX Hot and Wild.” See my point?

No matter what this crazy couple does however, I just love them dearly. I actually bought an OK Magazine in transit this week for about $12 dollars US. I hate the pound.

Hopefully cute pics of Bunny Andre coming soon. Who can’t wait until Jordan gets her a bright blond baby wig.

[source]

July 18, 2007 at 8:41 am by EvilT

7You Can Only Ride the Dragon So Long

Let me preface this by saying I think Dave Chappelle is one of the funniest guys in the business. He’s super duper funny. In fact, as I noted back in the day, (the “day” being April 18th) I’m a big ol’ fan of his antics.

That said, the man is clearly on drugs. Check this out:

LOS ANGELES (AP) — Dave Chappelle was hospitalized over the weekend for exhaustion, his publicist said Tuesday. The 33-year-old comedian checked into an emergency room on Saturday and was released a few hours later, publicist Carla Sims said. “It was exhaustion; he had been traveling,” she said. “He’s fine.”

Yes, the rigorous travel made him “exhausted.” Actually, you should throw some airquotes up if you can on the word “exhaustion” because it so so deserves them. Exhaustion is code for “even his friends (that also do drugs) were freaked out because he combined the dragon with the eight ball so they dropped him at the front door of the hospital before peeling out so that the cop who’s stationed at the ER waiting room couldn’t catch their license plate number.” Man, that’s a long code.

When people are tired they check into a spa. Or a Hyatt. Or they go back to their mansion and order up a bevy of hookers to make them grilled cheese sandwiches. What don’t they do? Head off to the hospital.

Maybe he was tired and I’m reading too much into this. Actually I am pretty tired right now. I could use a grilled cheese.

July 18, 2007 at 8:11 am by Spiteful Lars