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12Guess That Celebrity! (Part 3)

Who’s the disgusting hot-shot director who treats his extras like hookers?

Find out at the end of the vid!

July 9, 2008 at 2:37 pm by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Uncategorized

44It’s Here! It’s Here! It’s Here! The Ali Lohan Single!

People.com has a first listen to Ali Lohan’s single, “All the Way Around.”

Listen to it here.

Ali says she’s different from Miley Cyrus: “She’s really good. But I have different music than her. It’s a different vibe – it’s definitely a different vibe. Mine is more hip-hop. Kind of like Rihanna.”

Sigh.

Somewhere, Rihanna is rolling her eyes.

The only difference between Ali and Miley is that Ali’s single is actually more treacly than Miley’s stuff.

Nothing original whatsoever about this.

In fairness, she’s 14, but I just don’t see a career for her unless she starts getting out of cars without wearing underwear. And I can’t even run those pics for a few more years, so she should just finish high school and try this again when she can legally “leak” nude pics of herself.

July 9, 2008 at 10:44 am by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Uncategorized

14A New Man for Chloe?

Eh, maybe, maybe not.

Chloe Sevigny showed up on the red carpet for the LA premiere of Generation Kill holding hands with actor James Ransone.

A budding romance?

Or a dumb publicity stunt?

Regardless, Chloe looks slightly less than totally ridiculous in whatever she’s wearing, and I’m just grateful for that.

July 9, 2008 at 10:25 am by Evil Beet

8Not with a Hooker!

Elizabeth Hurley and her husband of over a year, super-rich dude Arun Nayar, hang out on the streets of Manhattan, hookerless.

Elizabeth still looks fantastic.

July 9, 2008 at 10:06 am by Evil Beet

51What Are My Animals Doing?

Very important question.

So Max (my big male cat) and Leo (my little male dog) have this little game they play, where Max pins Leo down and then starts biting on his neck, vampire-style. Like, Max opens his mouth wide and sinks his teeth into Leo’s neck and just keeps them there. To the point where I find myself vaguely concerned that Max is going to give Leo a hicky. This behavior has gone on for several days. Leo doesn’t seem to mind — sometimes he swats a little at Max, but mostly he just stays very still and, when Max lets go, he jumps up to play again. I have tried to get photos but I’m never near a camera when they do it. Does anyone know what this behavior indicates? I’ve never seen a cat do this to another animal before. Max also sometimes bites Leo’s ears. Leo does mind this, and he squeals, and then Max realizes he’s crossed a line and stops.

But Leo seems to have developed an allegiance to Max. When Max and Josie (the girl cat) were in a brawl earlier today (a serious hissing brawl — the two of them are in a love triangle with Ashley that’s been causing problems for years, long story), Leo jumped up, barked, and ran to Max’s side, then circled him to make sure he was okay. It was very sweet.

Oh, and here are the first pics of Jamie Lynn Spears’ baby.

July 9, 2008 at 2:03 am by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Uncategorized

15David Lee Roth Almost Dies from a Nut

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ha ha ha ha ha.

Not that there’s anything funny about nut-related anaphylactic shock.

But aaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Sometimes you feel like a nut!

Sometimes you’re in anaphylactic shock!

OMG I crack myself up.

I also like how when you’re talking about David Lee Roth almost dying from “a nut,” there’s the vague connotation that he entered cardiac arrest during orgasm. I considered playing on that angle, but it’s 2 am and I’m lazy.

Should I actually tell you guys the news story I’m referencing?

Okay.

Two Ontario police officers have been credited with saving the life of Van Halen singer David Lee Roth – after he suffered a severe allergic reaction.

The rocker was pulled over on a stretch of highway in Oakland, Ontario on June 8 for speeding, and when cops approached the vehicle, they realized the star was in anaphylactic shock.

Roth has an allergy to nuts and was suffering a severe reaction after coming into contact with a contaminated substance.

The officers called an ambulance and kept Roth calm until paramedics arrived on the scene.

Okay, okay, okay.

Now I’m going to get lectured about how peanut allergies are very serious things. And they most certainly are. But in the David Lee Roth context, please, you have to admit it’s kind of totally hilarious.

Update: Roth is denying that this was him, saying that it was actually an impostor and that he’s not allergic to nuts. Weird!!!

July 9, 2008 at 1:53 am by Evil Beet
Filed Under: David Lee Roth