Amy has reportedly agreed to go to a rehab that is close to husband Blake’s jail, so that she can get sober while making regular conjugal visits. Frankly, if I were her, I’d think of this as an opportunity to get sober near a constant reminder of what can happen if she doesn’t clean her act up. She’s going to the Focus 12 Clinic, which is only fifteen miles away from Blake’s jail.
Good luck with this, Amy!
August 20, 2008 at 9:39 am by Evil Beet
I FINALLY had my camera near me when Leo and my cat Max got into one of their infamous battles. And, listen, I cropped out a LOT of the footage. I filmed them fighting for a full five minutes before Leo finally got bored and ran off. I just think this is the funniest shit ever. And you guys have been asking for new pics of Leo, so hopefully this tides you over.
Also, mad mad mad props to Laremy at Film.com, who was able to correctly come up with the band and name of this song when I sent him a text that said only “What’s the name of that Irish song from movies? That sounds angry?” Now that is someone who knows his shit. For anyone who cares, the band is Dropkick Murphys and the song is “Shipping up to Boston.”
I am amazingly proud of this video. I plan to submit it for Oscar consideration. I’m taking out a full-page ad in Variety later this year. That’s how much faith I have in it.
August 19, 2008 at 11:35 pm by Evil Beet
But someone sent along a link to a group entitled Alicia Sacramone Sucks at Gymnastics But I Still Wanna Fuck Her, and that, my friends, really sums up what the Olympics are all about in my mind. And in the minds of most Americans. I have joined the group.
And in the interest of gender parity, I have started my own group. It is called I Don’t Care About Michael Phelps’ Face, I Still Want to Butter His Fly, and I suggest you all join it ASAP, because it is the coolest group on Facebook. Aside from the ones about me.
And one final point of discussion:
Alicia Sacramone: Boob job? Yes or no? If yes, why? If no, how does she have tits?
August 19, 2008 at 11:25 pm by Evil Beet
You know, every now and then, something will happen that reminds me that I’m getting more mature. Like, I’ll carry the trash bag all the way to the trash chute, instead of just setting it in the hall outside my apartment and trusting that someone else will get so sick of the smell that they’ll take it to the trash chute for me. When I tell people I’m going to the gym later this afternoon, it’s the truth. When my cats are crying because they’re hungry at 6:30 in the morning, I get out of bed and give them food, rather than grabbing the water gun off the bed stand and shooting at them until they shut up. And, in the ultimate proof that I am becoming a full-fledged adult, I no longer care about The Hills. It’s true. I don’t watch it and I don’t want to. Every now and then I get a little pang of guilt about it, but it quickly passes. I really didn’t care at all about The Hills‘ season premiere on Monday and I’m not afraid to admit it.
But here are the pictures. Because I don’t think I’ll ever get old enough that I don’t want to look at other people’s dresses.
Also: Did Heidi get her lips done recently? Yes or no?
August 19, 2008 at 9:31 pm by Evil Beet
Here are the 10 most-watched broadcast network prime-time shows for the week ended Sunday, according to Nielsen Media Research:
1. Summer Olympics (Tuesday), NBC, 34 million
2. Summer Olympics (Saturday), NBC, 31.6 million
3. Summer Olympics (Monday), NBC, 30.2 million
4. Summer Olympics (Thursday), NBC, 29.7 million
5. Summer Olympics (Wednesday), NBC, 27.7 million
6. Summer Olympics (Sunday), NBC, 27.2 million
7. Summer Olympics (Friday), NBC, 26.1 million
8. Two and a Half Men, CBS, 8.1 million
9. NCIS, CBS, 7.2 million
10. 60 Minutes, 7.1 million
On average, the viewership numbers for these Olympics are 13% higher than we saw during the Athens games.
NBC owes Mr. Phelps a thank-you note.
August 19, 2008 at 6:10 pm by Evil Beet
This is what appeared on CNN’s website earlier in the week.
Apparently they were kind enough to remove the quotes after receiving complaints, but they still haven’t gotten around to getting Portia De Rossi’s name correct.