Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Mary-Kate Olsen: Back on Track

After years of being the laughingstock of blogs and tabloids the world around, Mary-Kate Olsen is back on our radar as a Very Serious Actress.

She rocks the cover of Elle this month, and had the interviewer meet her at trapeze class. So she’s still kind of crazy. But the article basically discusses how well-respected she is in the fashion industry — a lot of very big names have very kind things to say about her.

I’d love nothing more than to see an Olsen twin emerge as a successful adult actress.

Rock on, MK.

Happy Birthday Lindsay!

Heh, sometimes I forget how much I’m in love with Lindsay Lohan, and then she does something like throw a prom-themed 22nd birthday party, and my heart’s all aflutter for her once more.

Lindsay showed up at her prom-themed fete at Teddy’s on Wednesday night wearing a pink chiffon minidress. Samantha Ronson wore — a tuxedo. Yes. Love it, love it.

DJ AM provided the music, and celeb guests included Joel and Benji Madden, David Spade, Audrina Patridge, Sean Stewart and Evan Ross. Of course, Dina and Ali Lohan were present as well.

Lindsay was spotted drinking Red Bull early in the evening. We’ll find out by tomorrow morning’s photos whether or not that trend lasted …

I don’t have pics yet, but I’m sure they’ll be around tomorrow and I can’t wait.

Oh Hells Yes the Christie Brinkley Divorce Trial Is Starting Out AWESOME

Oh, I’m so happy.

I’m finally back in Seattle, where it’s pouring, and I just couldn’t be happier to be home. Thanks to the awesome ice wrap Tiffany got me in NYC, my foot was feeling a lot better and I was able to hobble through two airports with three bags and a dog without the use of a wheelchair. Phew! I have now been reunited with my cats and my couch and I’m just delighted.

To make life even better, the Christie Brinkley/Peter Cook divorce trial started out with a bang.

Cook admits that he paid Diana Bianchi — the teenager he was sleeping with — around $300K to keep her from pressing a sexual harrassment suit (or talking to the press, I assume). It turns out Christie found out about the affair when Diana’s stepfather told her about it. Um, how did Diana’s stepfather know about this? Like, how do you wind up having that kind of a conversation with your stepfather? I’m sure the sudden appearance of $300K had something to do with it, but still. Very weird.

He was also apparently a huge dick to Christie’s daughter with Billy Joel, Alexa Ray:

Alexa Ray Joel, 22, testified that Cook treated her well before he married her mother. But she said he was constantly on her case afterward, chastising her “if I chewed too loud” and criticizing her piano playing.

“He was just very critical of me in general,” said Joel, a singer, songwriter and pianist.

When her lengthy shower caused a leak in the kitchen below in 2003, Cook stormed into the bathroom and demanded she mop up immediately, Joel testified. When she got downstairs wearing only a towel, he pushed her head into a bucket and yelled, “You clean this up!” she said.

PLUS, Peter Cook spent about $3,000 a month on pornographic Web sites in 2005. Holy shit! Does he know how much porn is FREE online now??? What the hell are you spending $3,000 a MONTH on?? That’s just silly.

The couple had a pre-nup, so right now the primary battle is over custody of the children. Christie thinks he should get no custody, while Peter thinks he should get at least joint custody.

Looking forward to more of this!

This Made Me Cry!!!

Okay so today, on Foot Injury Day, you guys are just getting a series of stupid YouTube videos because I’m too hurted to do things that require thought.

This one honestly brought tears to my eyes. Soooo amazing!!

I spoke on the phone to a podiatrist who said I probably had a small fracture, but that I would be fine to fly home and then go to an ER in Seattle, which is my plan. My amazing wonderful beautiful friend Tiffany is out getting me an Ace bandage wrap and an ice pack for the plane. And my OTHER amazing wonderful beautiful friend Trish offered to pick me up at the airport and take me to the hospital. I am such a lucky young woman to have such incredible friends.

My entire foot is now blue, which had me worried that my foot was dying and was going to fall off, but after describing it to the podiatrist he said it was just bruising and that my foot would survive. So I guess I’m getting a wheelchair at the airport and sucking it up.

The Dangers of Dating – Watch more free videos

So, you guys, I would currently be researching and writing interesting celebrity gossip stories for you, but my fucking foot hurts so bad I can’t concentrate on anything. However, as I was sitting at my computer trying to do research, Tiffany was sitting at her computer listening to this. I was like, “What the hell is that? Send it to me ASAP.”

So this is what you guys are getting in lieu of actual well-researched celebrity gossip.

It kills time just as well, I promise.

Here’s the backstory:

The back story on this is that a girl named Olga was out with her friends in the Marina district of San Francisco (known for being a popular hang out for douches), and she talked to this guy named Dmitri for all of two minutes. Then she gave him her card and said “give me a call.” The above is the messages he left. Listen to the whole thing, it just keeps getting better and better. I won’t even tell you my favorite parts because i don’t want to ruin anything. Just listen.


Angelina Won’t Have the Kiddos for Another Couple of Weeks

Angie’s presence in the hospital appears to be merely a precaution for now. She won’t be giving birth for at least a couple more weeks.

“Angelina’s pregnancy has gone very well so far and she has absolutely no problems at all,” obstetrician Dr. Michel Sussman said at a press conference from outside Nice’s Lenval hospital, before delivering the blow.

“But she still has at least two or three weeks to go until she gives birth and she’ll most certainly be staying in the hospital until after she gives birth.”

TOTAL cocktease!!!