Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Going Gray!

Roseanne Barr has apparently decided to embrace the aging process.

The 55-year-old actress showed off some gray at the TV Land Awards in Santa Monica on Sunday.

Eh, you have to hand it to her: in the long run, at least she turned out a lot better than Tom Arnold, who can’t seem to find a red carpet without first finding an eight-ball of coke these days.

Patrick Swayze’s Not Going to Let a Little Cancer Keep Him Down

Patrick Swayze announced on Sunday that, despite the fact that he’s battling pancreatic cancer, he’ll stay on in the lead role of the upcoming A&E series, The Beast. He’ll play an FBI agent who becomes a target of Internal Affairs.

“I have searched for quite a long time to find a character that is this multilayered, unpredictable and downright entertaining as well as a project this current and cutting-edged,” Swayze said in a statement from A&E.

The show will begin filming in Chicago this summer, and will air in early 2009.

Um …

I don’t know how to put this nicely.

Liv Tyler looks awful at the premiere of The Incredible Hulk.

I hate everything about this look. The shoes are too clunky for the dress. And the dress is too thin for her legs. Liv is obviously one of those girls whose legs get bulkier when they work out, and that can be really sexy, but the dress is so thin and light that it just makes her thighs look gargantuan. She should have gone with a heavier, darker fabric and a cleaner cut. And the bottom of the dress is wrinkled. And the top of the dress is … unfinished?

And I almost never say this, but, uh, there’s a time and a place for a spray tan, darling, and that time is before you put on that dress.

Getting Fit with Condi!

Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice leads the warm-up at the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure in DC.

OMG, you guys, how much would you pay for the Condoleezza Rice work-out DVD?

There’s an amazing parody in there somewhere. Lots of funny jokes to be made. Unfortunately I don’t know enough about politics to make them myself.

[Image via Splash]

Blind Items!

1) Which star of a new TV hit has Hollywood scrambling to the pharmacy? He’s spreading herpes around town like wildfire.

2) Which hit TV show’s cast members are as bad in real life as the characters in the plotline? At a recent party, two of the hot actors held up the bathroom line while cutting their own lines in the stalls.

Kate Moss Needs Her Bathroom Helpers

Poor Kate Moss needs lots of friends to help her go potty.

Or so it would seem.

Kate left an Agent Provocateur event in NYC because she was told there was a strict one-person-at-a-time rule for the bathroom. Kate wanted to bring three of her friends in with her.

“But I’m hosting the event!” she complained. The bathroom attendant didn’t budge. At that point, Kate said “Forget it” and walked away.

You know how some people are pee-shy? Like, they can’t pee when someone’s watching them? I think Kate Moss is the opposite of pee-shy. She simply cannot urinate unless there are a minimum of three people there to watch her.

Or, you know, she wanted to do cocaine with her friends in the bathroom.

But that’s kind of a stretch.

Everyone’s Mean to Ali Lohan

This week’s episode of Living Lohan focused on the fact that Ali was the target of “mean girls” at her school. And in her neighborhood. They’re all juss jealous, of course.

The cure?

Dina Lohan dragging Ali’s ass to some inner-city performing arts program where a bunch of black kids sing their hearts out about their awful home lives and Dina’s eyes tear up. This was, according to Dina, so that Ali could hang out with other kids who are “going through the same thing” as Ali. Which doesn’t make any sense at all. What these kids are going through has absolutely nothing to do with what Ali is going through. I don’t know why she couldn’t have just been like “I want Ali to see this so that she understands how good she has it, and how some people sing and dance as a form of passionate, healthy, imperative expression and not to guarantee themselves a VIP table at Goa stocked with Grey Goose and cocaine.” That would have been totally acceptable. But to imply that the problems these kids face have anything to do with the fact that Ali is being occasionally and non-violently teased by girls at her suburban high school is just insane.

It’s like, if my daughter’s contact lens fell out one day at school and she couldn’t find it and got all upset, I wouldn’t make her spend a day at a school for blind kids in the hopes that she could find someone there to relate to in her struggle. Just saying.

Dude, did I have a point?

Not really.

But what I think is funny? All those girls yelling at Ali to go visit her sister in rehab?

Will probably be in rehab themselves one day.

That level of teenage insecurity just screams future drug abuse.