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30Keri Russell in Details Magazine

Not bad, but I liked it better when it was called Fiona Apple.

Does this mean Keri will get really, really wasted at the VMAs next year and go up on stage and be all like “This world is bullshit. And you shouldn’t model your life — wait a second — you shouldn’t model your life about what you think that we think is cool and what we’re wearing and what we’re saying and everything. Go with yourself. Go with yourself” and then stumble off?*

No?

Then I don’t care.

Oh, and the pic where she’s wearing the big black hat?

Total nipple peekage.

* How the fuck is that clip not on YouTube? Life is totes unfair.

Update: Evil Beet readers rock!!! Thanks Natalie for sending this! The fun starts around the 2 minute mark.

December 4, 2008 at 8:17 pm by Evil Beet

19Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise Inside New York Times Magazine

What do we think?

Looks like it’ll be a great photo shoot, if nothing else.

“There’s a misperception about me that I just became this wallflower, this woman who doesn’t have any control of her life,” says Katie in the issue hitting newsstands Sunday, which includes a feature on TomKat’s life. “And that’s pretty wrong. From the very beginning, I’ve made choices in my life that have been very strong.”

It is certainly very cool to look at the evolution of Katie Holmes — from this girl-next-door TV starlet to this glamorous, untouchable woman of mystery.

More pics of Katie here.

December 4, 2008 at 7:46 pm by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Katie Holmes, Tom Cruise

14Britney’s First Hubby Goes to Jail

This is a weird story.

Britney’s original husband — of 55 hours — is doing some time in jail, because he refused to look at dead bodies.

[The] reason Brit’s 55 hour first hubby is behind bars in L.A. is because he blew off two court ordered appointments at the county morgue.

After Alexander was busted for DUI back in 2006, the judge ordered the 27-year-old to go to an alcohol education program, which required him to visit the local morgue. When the judge learned Alexander had ditched his first 2 appointments, he refused to give him a third chance and promptly chucked him in the slammer.

Jason is scheduled to be released on December 9th — and after he serves his stint behind bars, Jason’s obligation to check out the dead bodies will officially be dead.

Wow, does the LA system really make you look at dead bodies for getting a DUI? That’s kind of creepy. I don’t know how I feel about that at all.

Also, does anyone know what this uber-douche is doing in LA anyway? I thought he was one of Brit’s friends from Louisiana. If he’s living in LA with some sort of manager on the premise that he was the dude Britney married in Las Vegas, that’s just tragic.

December 4, 2008 at 3:21 pm by Evil Beet

16Yummy!

Scarlett Johansson and Eva Mendes both look positively edible at the launch party for The Spirit in London on Thursday.

Scarlett in particular looks younger and happier than I’ve seen her look in forever. Did she have work done — or is marriage just treating her really, really well?

December 4, 2008 at 2:54 pm by Evil Beet

3Governor Spitzer to Write Column About Hookers the Economy

Whore-loving former New York governor Eliot Spitzer has a new job — as a blogger!

Okay, okay, except they can’t call it a “blog,” because that would be SO BENEATH a former U.S. governor. It would be even more under him than Ashley Dupre. So instead we’re calling it an “online column.” That’s what I write too. I’m not a gossip blogger. I author an “online gossip column.” Duh.

Anyway, as our economy completely disintegrates in front of our eyes, what Americans really want is to take financial advice from a disgraced governor who wasn’t even smart enough to get away with fucking hookers. Of course. So Spitzer’s “online column” for Slate.com will focus on the economy and financial regulation. It will appear every other week.

Good to see that at least SOMEBODY can find work these days!

December 4, 2008 at 2:44 pm by Evil Beet
Filed Under: Eliot Spitzer

14Run, Sarah, Run!

Sarah Jessica Parker and son James go for a brisk jog in NYC.

Why the rush?

Is the mole back for revenge?

December 4, 2008 at 2:22 pm by Evil Beet