Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Uh, Christina? This Has to Stop.

Once again, Christina Aguilera was spotted stumbling out of a Hollywood hot spot. The new mom needed two people to help her walk from the Hotel Bel Air to her car.

Like, Christina? This is fine once in awhile, but it’s becoming a pretty regular occurrence, sweetie, and that’s not good for a new mom. Have you seen Nicole Richie out drunk even once since she had her kid on like the exact same day you had yours? No, you haven’t. And I cannot fucking believe I am telling someone to take maturity cues from Nicole Richie, but, yeah. That’s what I’m doing. That’s what it’s come to, Christina. Cut this out, girl. It makes you look awful.

Pete Wentz: Why I Lied

Petey Pete Wentz explains why he lied about Ashlee’s pregnancy until she was out of her first trimester, in an email to MTV News.

Every woman, no matter who they are or what they do for a living, has the right to wait at least 3 months before sharing this very personal news. We wanted to wait until after the first trimester and get a clean bill of health from our doctors before confirming anything, just like any other couple.

Being a boy I have no idea how to respond to such things and my first instinct was to protect her and the baby.

It’s insane that you can’t let happy news brew in Hollywood. This wasn’t about press or anything. It was about the health of the baby and trying to find a way to be happy with what should be the most happy time of our lives in the middle of a press blitz. I apologize to anyone who felt misinformed but the truth is, the person and growing baby is who I felt most loyal to protect and defend.

Yeah, yeah. Unfortunately, I agree with Pete here.

Wanna Play Some Sex and the City Trivia???

The inimitable Marta over at RealNetworks put together this fantastic Sex and the City trivia quiz.

Okay, okay, I helped a little. And by “helped” I mean I sat in her office playing with Leo while she did all the work, and I was totally blown away by all her SatC knowledge. She’s a Sex and the City genius!!!! These are tough questions. I’m interested to see how you all do.

Click here to play!

Lindsay Lohan’s Big 22nd B-Day Bash is Canceled

Ah, this makes me feel much better that the guy never wrote me back about Evil Beet’s official sponsorship of Lindsay Lohan’s birthday party. Because, like, I would have been happy to cash out my retirement savings for a shot at this.

Lindsay Lohan’s big 22nd birthday party has been canceled.

Sources say that Linds was pushed by her management and publicity team to cancel the party because of all the recent bad press surrounding her. They were also having trouble attracting “corporate brands.”

WTF????

Evil Beet is an LLC!!!!! We would have done it!!!!!!

Lindsay’s management team missed out on a huge opportunity. I was going to throw her the bestest birthday party ever! I was gonna rent out a Peter Piper Pizza and get balloons and hats and cocaine and everything!

Don’t Worry, Kids, Clay Aiken Didn’t Have Sex with a Woman

There’s a lot of talk today about the fact that Clay Aiken is going to be a daddy.

I can’t emphasize this fact enough: the woman was artificially inseminated with his sperm. He did not put his penis in a vagina. That would have just turned my whole world upside-down.

Clay’s baby mama is 50-year-old Jaymes Foster, a record producer and Clay’s alleged “best friend.”

Word on the street is that Aiken will have an active role in raising the child, which is adorable.

Fun with YouTube: Julianne Hough, “That Song in My Head”

Julianne’s PR guy sent me a copy of this album a couple of weeks ago, and I have to say it’s a really good country album, but this song is by far my fave. It’s so catchy and fun.

This album recently hit #1 on the country charts.

I’ve called it before and I’m calling it again: this girl is gonna be huge.

Oh, and her love interest in this video? Sooooo hot. Can someone set me up on a blind date with this guy, please?

Mischa Barton Can’t Get Her Shit Together

Everyone’s a damn alcoholic today. Mischa “DUI” Barton can’t seem to show up for any of the promotional events for her new film, You and I, which premiered at Cannes. She lives in France now, and she still didn’t make it to any of the promotions. She’s supposed to be doing interviews in London right now, but she’s totally MIA.

Says the film’s director: “She hasn’t pulled out of interviews, she’s pulled out of everything . . . Her room is here, she is here, but trying to get the two together has just been impossible. We just don’t know where Mischa is.”

Oh, Mischa. No one’s going to cast you in anything ever again, dear.