Billy Ray Cyrus accomplished the feat of being a total embarrassment to his children and society at large long ago, but clearly he’s decided to take things up a notch by releasing a hip hop sequel to his 1992 hit (and only hit, for that matter), ‘Achy Breaky Heart’. It’s got Larry King, semi-naked aliens, hooka smoking and a whole lotta fuckery.
I have no idea what on earth possessed this guy to make this video – maybe he wants to steal some of Miley‘s press, or just embarrass her into hiding, because seriously, this is just not right.
February 12, 2014 at 4:30 pm by Jennifer
Jennifer Aniston is in “deep shit” for not having kids? [Amy Grindhouse]
Abbie Cornish doesn’t mind showing her nipples on the red carpet [The Superficial]
Leonardo DiCaprio and Jonah Hill are BFF [Lainey Gossip]
Let’s check out Vanessa Hudgens’ fashion – for real this time [The Frisky]
Shirley Temple was the cutest kid ever, right? [theBERRY]
Anna Kendrick is adorable and totally underrated [Socialite Life]
Drew Barrymore has a new book out – will you read? [ICYDK]
What in the hell is Uma Thurman wearing? [I'm Not Obsessed]
Courtney Stodden got new lips, apparently [IDLYITW]
Imogen Poots has a weird name and a see-through dress [The Blemish]
T.I. and wife Tiny are not having your cheating claims [Bossip]
What’s Viggo Mortinsen been up to lately? [Celebitchy]
Jasmin Walia is clearly new around here [Celebslam]
This is what Tom Hanks’ son Chet looks like now [Fishwrapper]
So, Doritos has a new test product at 7-11 [OMG Blog]
Lupita Nyong’o can seriously do no wrong [Bohomoth]
Samuel L. Jackson is not having your bullshit [Amy Grindhouse]
You can’t deport Justin Bieber, he deports you [The Superficial]
Holy shit, Victoria Beckham is actually wearing flats! [Lainey Gossip]
Prince Harry is getting closer with girlfriend Cressida [Celebitchy]
February 12, 2014 at 2:30 pm by Jennifer
Michael Jordan and his wife Yvette Prieto Jordan have two reasons to celebrate: they’re the parents of identical twin girls! Yvette gave birth on Sunday in West Palm Beach, Florida. Hurrah!
The statement from their spokeswoman, Estee Portnoy, was short but sweet:
“Yvette and the babies are doing well and the family is overjoyed at their arrival.”
I certainly don’t envy these two starting over – Michael’s already got three grown kids (all in their 20s) – but I bet they’re super excited to have new babies around. Who doesn’t love babies? They’re cute, they’re squishy and best of all, they can’t talk back yet!
In any case, Michael and Yvette got married last April and announced the pregnancy in November, so things are moving right along for these two. Congrats!
February 12, 2014 at 1:30 pm by Jennifer
So, Kristen Stewart is apparently more than just an actress – she’s also an amateur poet and all-around artiste, and decided to share her “embarrassing” creation in the new issue of Marie Claire. Like, she literally recited this word for word despite the “it’s awful” front. It’s called “My Heart Is a Wiffleball / Freedom Pole” and… what?!
Here it is in all its beauty:
I reared digital moonlight
You read its clock, scrawled neon across that black
Kismetly … ubiquitously crest fallen
Thrown down to strafe your foothills
…I’ll suck the bones pretty.
Your nature perforated the abrasive organ pumps
Spray painted everything known to man,
Stream rushed through and all out into
Something Whilst the crackling stare down sun snuck
Through our windows boarded up
He hit your flint face and it sparked.
And I bellowed and you parked
We reached Marfa.
One honest day up on this freedom pole
Devils not done digging
He’s speaking in tongues all along the pan handle
And this pining erosion is getting dust in
And I’m drunk on your morsels
And so I look down the line
Your every twitch hand drum salute
I mean, I suppose I’ve seen worse… not much worse, but I know it exists out there.
I’m not sure what the point was in sharing this, as I imagine she wrote it as a more personal thing to get out whatever was going on in that head of hers. Oh man, do you guys think this is about RUPERT??? She mentioned parking somewhere, and we KNOW what went down (so to speak) there. Uh, way to throw it in Rob‘s face, Kristen. WHERE’S HIS POETRY?
February 12, 2014 at 11:30 am by Jennifer
Oh, you Beliebers are something else. Girls (I’m going to assume these are people under the age of 16) have been so antsy to get their hands on a piece of Justin “I’m a big hard man” Bieber that they were willing to settle for grabbing onto a likeness of him in wax figure form on display at Madame Tussaud’s in New York City. In fact, so many of them gripped Wax Bieber so hard, so many times that the figure has deteriorated to the point where it’s been taken off display and put into retirement. Uh…
From The New York Post:
One source said of the Bieber figure, which was installed in his younger, more innocent days, “With no ropes or barriers to stop them, thousands of fans have had their photographs taken with him since then — but it has taken its toll.”
Madame Tussauds New York says the figure has been damaged over the years, and despite regular maintenance, “it no longer does justice either to the star or to the attraction,” and so it has reluctantly decided to remove it.
Madame Tussauds general manager, Bret Pidgeon, acknowledged, “This is disappointing, but hopefully we can welcome a new ‘grown-up’ Justin back to the attraction in the near future.”
Nope. Just forget it. The same thing is going to happen so long as you continue to allow hormonal teenagers to hump all over your wax. The heat from their bodies will melt that shit to a pool of candle wax in no time. Although, maybe that’s a good thing…
I hope the new figurine is Justin in his jail gear! Mugshot Justin is the best Justin, of course.
February 12, 2014 at 8:30 am by Jennifer
Shia LaBeouf has been suffering from a bit of a breakdown for a while now, which culminated in him turning up on a red carpet in Germany to promote Lars Von Trier’s Nymphomaniac with a paper bag over his head bearing the words “I AM NOT FAMOUS ANYMORE”. Except you are, but maybe you should never have been in the first place.
Well, now he’s back in the states and he’s taking his terror to the streets – er, well, to the Cohen Gallery in Los Angeles, where he’s hosting an “art exhibition” entitled #IAMSORRY. It’s an absolute rip off of something already done years ago by actual artist Marina Abramoviç and Maria Legault called The Apology Project, so it’s bullshit from the get-go, but let’s go with it.
A TIME magazine reporter named Ryan Sandoval was one of the first visitors to this sorry excuse for an exhibition, and here’s a bit of his experience:
I arrived in the late morning, just after the exhibition opened, and was frisked by a man outside on the sunny sidewalk, a foot away from glass bearing the words “#IAMSORRY” and “shia labeouf.” Inside the gallery, a woman behind a table (who I later learned was the artist Nastja Säde Rönkkö) asked me to choose an item from those laid out before her. The options: a whip, pliers, a bowl of Hershey kisses, a copy of Daniel Clowes’ Death Ray, a pink ukelele, a bottle of Brut cologne, an Optimus Prime toy (get it?) and a bowl of about 100 paper slips bearing typed messages. I reached for a single slip, but Rönkkö asked me to take the whole bowl, and so I did.
I sat down. I read messages mostly negative, some positive, declaring LaBeouf either a “baby,” an “idiot,” or a “genius.” Things about having to “move on,” or suggestions of “death.” They felt like tweets; they probably were tweets. I read about thirteen notes in measured tones, opting out of the ones that were too harsh or too praiseworthy; I thought about reading the whole bowl, but then got self-conscious saying so many hurtful things to LaBeouf, who in that moment, just seemed like a mixed-up kid.
I’d entered with a sort of respect for the gallery as a concept, but it didn’t feel like a sacred space by the time I’d left: Ultimately, it was just me, a bowl of tweets, and an actor reacting to criticism. It wasn’t all that moving: It was just the sort of thing that makes you shake your head.”
Well… yeah. I don’t think anyone’s entering a Shia LaBeouf art exhibition expecting to be changed forever. Especially when what he’s doing is in no way original and is just another stunt in his mental unraveling. It’s not profound, it’s not mindblowing and worst of all, it’s not even entertaining, so there’s no enjoyment to be had out of it.
This shit is running until Friday from 11am – 6pm, as all good art does, natch.