Who used to dabble in gay prostitution? [The Superficial]

Ridiculous sex products. [The Frisky]

Diddy apologizes for being a douche. [TMZ]

Wes Craven‘s fears. [Starpulse]

New George Harrison documentary. [LA Times]

Jennifer Aniston CRIES. [Socialite Life]

More Rihanna with no pants. [Yeeeah]

LeAnn Rimes‘ secret addiction. [Amy Grindhouse]

Movie characters that were too sexy to die. [Pajiba]

Amanda Knox is on her way home. [Cele|bitchy]

More Britney tour photos. [The Superficial]

According to Mr. Maybe-Hottest-Man-Alive, he doesn’t think he’s all that attractive. In fact, he’d probably go as far as to say that he’s funny-looking. And I say that with some certainty, because he said something similar:

“I’m not that good looking. I think I’m a pretty weird-looking guy. Every role I got up until The Notebook was the weirdo, freak, psychopath, nerd, outsider character guy. I think things have changed.”

Well, Ryan, as if you didn’t know, you are the hotness. And even when you were playing those “weirdo, freak, psychopath, nerd, outsider characters,” you were STILL the hotness. I know you better than this, boy. I know you have to know that your attractiveness is way off the charts. You wouldn’t be doing all those confident, look-at-me modeling shoots if you didn’t kind of think you were attractive. I mean, I’m sure your personality’s the bees knees, but you dated SANDRA BULLOCK. Did you think you got by on that one just by your sparkling charm? OK, fair point. She married Jesse James, and you, my friend, do have quite the sparkling charm. But I refuse to believe that you don’t think you’re all that good-looking. Is this from all that hanging around with that Eva Mendes girl? Because you know how I feel about that.

It’s time for another round of weekly winnings for the Evil Beet Caption This contests! Check it out, and if you’re the winner, I’ll be sending you an email to collect your mailing information in order to send your prize. Sure hope you registered with a valid email address!

We’ll be choosing the winner of the above photo next Tuesday, so tune in to find out who it is!

The winner on last week’s Britney Spears photo: George
“Better check the beaming machine, Scotty, it seems to be on low power.”

First runner-up: Dillon
“The treasure trolls have finally found a place for themselves in the 21st century.”

Second runner-up: Lauren
“Hehehehe y’all it’s like I’m Simba or somethin’!” Know what we do with pop stars who step out of their kingdom? Conservatorship.”

Congrats to George! As for the rest of you, get commenting if you want to win some free crap!

Because they did! And I know a lot of you guys probably immediately thought of the EB staff here when you heard the news, but I can assure you: I’ve been sick as hell for the past few days, and though I wouldn’t put it past myself to do something like that normally, I just haven’t been up for it. I’m not sure what Jenn was doing when all this went down, but personally, I’d be looking at Emily before anyone. I mean, the three of us have all got a bit of malice concern when it comes to LeAnn, but she and Emily? Guys, they go way back.

What LeAnn had to say:

“To address the accident that happened in front of our home this morning, everyone is ok and safe. However, if drunk driving was involved it is terribly sad. My family could have been seriously injured and any situation where someone is drinking and driving should not be taken lightly. Needless to say, it was a very unsettling call to receive this morning. Thank goodness the young driver and everyone at home are ok.”

I’m so hoping that drunk driving did not have a thing to do with the incident, because then I’ll just have more ammo when it comes to “talking” about girlfriend here. I mean, come on. Way to assume and make a WHOLE STATEMENT based on something that may or may not be true.

… Want a job, LeAnn?

Did you hear the news? The iPhone 5 will be unveiled, rumor has it, at noon (CST) today!

But 20 years ago, Zack Morris was on the bleeding edge of Mobile Information Technologies. And no wonder Zack was so smug! He was the first high-schooler to ever have his cell phone confiscated by the principal!

What’s weird is how, in the course of Saved by the Bell, Zack Morris upgrades to a slick, silver flip-phone, but then promptly downgrades to his former black brick. And then he downgrades again, to a massive beige log! Financial troubles in the Morris household, maybe?

Thanks, Buzzfeed.

My in-laws can drink me under the table.

—Claire Danes, on “British pub culture” and, more specifically, on husband Hugh Dancy’s comparatively hard-drinkin’ parents.

I just love this quote. I know “celebrity gossip” is moralistic, always quick to finger-wag at fast-and-loud living; after all, every other story is Car Wreck this and Trainwreck that. Still, there is something so endearing about prim Claire Danes loosening up and learning how to shotgun a Guinness (or cider, or whatever it is you Brits slam in the morning before you take the Tube to your fancy jobs).

Danes’ entire quote, in context, from Pop2it:

She tells OK! that since marrying Hugh Dancy, she’s embraced British pub culture with a particular enthusiasm.

In fact, she says she now struggles to politely sip wine at parties when she’s back in the States. “I’ve been in training for a number of years now. They’re not kidding [in Britain],” she says. “My in-laws can drink me under the table. I’ve now come to really enjoy pub culture but there was a transitional period where I was sort of like, ‘What is this?’”

The difference, she says, is in the lack of distraction in England. “They sit in one seat and drink for about seven hours straight,” she says. “[Americans] drink, but we drink and do other things, like, we drink and eat or we drink and dance or we drink and, like, take a walk and go drink somewhere else. They talk, and that’s probably why they’ve produced such witty, clever people.”

I haven’t hopped the pond since I was 16—so I was way too young to acquaint myself with so-called “British pub culture”—but this quote really rings true to me. I do remember that social norms are scarily different here, insofar as we in the U.S. recognize “familiarity” upon first introduction as good “people skills”; abroad, a wide grin and too-soon hugging could be construed as, if not unmannerly, outright sinister. Is this an accurate read, Europeans?

And that social rigidity explains the need for a culture of “socially acceptable loosening-up,” AKA drinking in one spot for seven long hours. (Or as I call it, ‘dating’!)

Ohhhh, I’m totally JK’ing, you guys, but only sort of. Please, somebody explain “pub culture” to me. **Hangs head; scarfs an entire Shepherd’s Pie in shame**