Any action movie worth half its budget has that ‘cliffhanging’ scene. You know the one: someone slips off a window ledge, or maybe out of a helicopter, and now his or her life tenuously hangs in the balance. “Hold on!” the hero shouts. The damsel-in-distress’s fingers are slipping, one by one. “Grab my hand!” the hero pleads.

This is pretty corny, but I’ve always found the ubiquitous cliffhanging scene to be really cerebral, all taut with suspense. I think it’s because, during my elementary school gym class days, I could never do a single pull-up. (Most girls seemed to whiff out around pull-up #2, thank you.) And then I’d watch the “HOLD ON!!!” scene in movies and think to myself, Well, gosh, in that situation, I’d just let go of whatever I was holding onto. And I knew I was doomed since, after all, attempts to cross the monkey bars tended to end with me falling into the woodchips, massaging my arms and yowling with humiliation.

Above, you’ll find a montage of classic HOLD ON!!! movie moments, including (SPOILER!) that scene in The Good Son where Mom has to decide whether to let go of Macaulay Culkin or Elijah Wood. (OH NO!) The video is set to “Hold On,” the 1990 pop ballad that marked the debut of Wilson Phillips.

“I threw a chair at a director. It wasn’t my proudest moment. He was treating a script supervisor horribly… When the director walked in, I threw a chair at him. I missed, of course. I was like, ‘You can’t speak to people like that.’ I can’t tolerate it.”

So, um, you threw a chair at him, girlfriend? You don’t think that was, maybe, at all too dramatic? Couldn’t you have just spoken to him? Embarrassed him in front of his and your peers? Walked off set to make a statement? Advised the script supervisor to quit that shit? Don’t you think you’re kind of old for that kind of theatric? Shouldn’t you leave this kind of stuff to the seasoned pros like Lindsay Lohan? Or just maybe someone who’s a little bit younger and less mature. I don’t know. Did Justin put you up to this? Did he say that this, combined with your recent black-and-leather-wearing, will give you the street-tough cred that he so gets off on?

I know there’s a lot of questions here for you to answer, but if there’s anything you’ve got tons of lately, it’s time, right?

You know who Justin Timberlake looks in this video? Danny Masterson, or ‘Hyde’ from That 70′s Show. Seriously, all he’d need is the stoner squint and some glasses, and it’d be spot-on, even the mannerisms. And Ryan Gosling, goodness. He was just as sweet as pie. Not that I watched the Mickey Mouse Club when I was younger or anything (Are You Afraid of the Dark was more my speed), but are any of you who did, like, totally thunderstruck that these two, who got their starts on MMC, are two of the hottest tickets going today? And for the younger crowd (do we have a younger crowd?), who do you think, today, will be next decade’s hottest tickets?

I don’t usually commend Lady Gaga for her fashion choices, but this I kind of liked. I’d never, you know, wear it myself or anything, but the Lady’s known for her outlandish costumes, and this one, well … she actually looks quite pretty, dare I say it.

What do you guys think – can’t dress up shit no matter what, or does Stefani Germanotta have this one on lockdown?

Ashton moves out, Demi moves in on the bottle. [The Superficial]

Who’s the latest actress to be called “Robo Scarecrow“? [Lainey Gossip]

Richest woman in Hollywood. [Starpulse]

Kim Kardashian regrets her wedding. [The Superficial]

George Clooney goes too far. [Huff Po]

New Willow Smith song featuring Nicki Minaj. [ICYDK]

Well here’s a nice little bikini body. [INFDaily]

Amanda Knox gets porn offer, of course. [CDL]

Blake Lively‘s dating WHO now? [Lainey Gossip]

Matt Damon and Edward Norton circa 1998. [Caught on Set]

LeAnn Rimes gets a skinnier friend. [Cele|bitchy]

Ke$ha‘s latest awful bathing suit. [Celebrity Rant]

A farty Nancy Grace. [The Blemish]

You know what I love? When movies are filmed right beneath your nose, there’s nothing really hidden at all from public knowledge, and then you find out someone like Emma Watson is in a movie that you didn’t really care about all that much to begin with and all of a sudden, you’re interested. That’s kind of how this trailer went for me. I sat through the first twenty seconds or so thinking, “Alright, Michelle Williams, you’re going to make a fine Marilyn Monroe, that’s super. I love the production design, and it’s definitely going to be a period piece – which I just love,” and then I saw Emma Watson grace the screen and all composure was lost. “Emma Watson’s in this film? Now I’m going to have to see it.” She’s the youngest, most budding-est actress going right now, and as you’re probably aware, I’m completely obsessed with seeing what her film career is going to be like post-Potter.

So that’s how it went, and then at the very ass-end of the clip, I – of course – automatically thought of our good friend, Lindsay Lohan, and how, um, very different this movie would be if, for some reason, she’d been cast as her idol, Marilyn Monroe, but I’m not that sure the director and producers wanted this to be a comedy.