Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Sean Penn is surprised to be in love again

sean penn

Sean Penn and Charlize Theron are apparently getting married soon and things seem to be going well with them – perhaps somewhat surprising given the recent revelations (they were revelations to me) of what a piece of shit he was to previous partners. I mean, tying Madonna to a chair and beating her for hours? And God knows what went on with Robin Wright, but it’s safe to say they’re not really on good terms…

In any case, Sean expressed his thoughts on love and marriage in a new interview with Esquire UK:

Yeah, I’m surprised to be in love. Lot of reasons. I’m self-proclaimed bad at mathematics but I can do two plus two: 53 years old plus finally beginning to figure out why you haven’t been happy in a single relationship? It could seem too late. But to run into somebody now who you care about is a much more passionate, deeper, truer and – God! – a much happier feeling. It’s a lot more romantic and a lot more fulfilling to be in a relationship and to think you’re a good person within it.

Yes, I’d get married again. You say I’ve been married twice before but I’ve been married under circumstances where I was less informed than I am today, so I wouldn’t even consider it a third marriage, I’d consider it a first marriage on its own terms if I got married again. I mean, I like the tradition. A friend of mine wrote a line, “Without tradition, new things die.” And I don’t want new things to die.

Well, isn’t he a perfect gentleman? Insert eyeroll here. Who knows, maybe he’s a changed man and it’s a match made in heaven with Charlize, and fair enough. He’s just always come off as a bit of an asshole – but hey, some women like that sorta thing, so best of luck to ‘em.

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Iggy Azalea complains about being “stereotyped”

iggy azalea

Have you ever seen such a spectacular display of ignorance in your life? Iggy Azalea – cultural appropriator and racist of the ages – has actually complained in a new interview about being “stereotyped” by people calling her out for putting on a fake Southern accent and basically being a caricature of whatever she thinks black people are supposed to be like in her warped ass Australian mind. I mean, guys, HOW COULD YOU?

iggy azalea twitter

iggy azalea twitter

iggy azalea twitter

LOL uhhhh… in what way is Iggy Azalea “complex”, “multidimensional” OR “interesting”? She’s giving advice she doesn’t follow herself. Second of all, she honestly is so dumb, she doesn’t understand the irony of her own rant. It’s totally okay for her to stereotype black people and culture and pretend to be part of it, but when actual black artists like Eve and Jill Scott (at whom this rant seems to have been directed) comment on how she should, you know, be HERSELF instead of pretending to put on an accent and take on characteristics she sees as appropriate for rap culture, then SHE is being stereotyped? The ignorance astounds.

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Robin Wright’s engagement to Ben Foster is back on!

robin wright ben foster

Robin Wright announced her engagement to Ben Foster this time last year, but things sorta went wrong somewhere along the way and they broke it off. But don’t worry – all is not lost! They’re actually back on again and it looks like they’re gonna be walking down the aisle after all!

“They are fully back together and really happy,” the insider tells Us of the House of Cards star, 48, and the Lone Survivor actor, 34, who were photographed at the Giorgio Armani Prive Haute Couture show on Jan. 27 in France, engagement ring and all. “Ben is the nicest guy. She knows she has a keeper.”

That’s not to say their relationship is perfect, of course, just that they’re willing to work on it now. “There were a bunch of issues before, a lot because of distance and her schedule, but they are working on them,” the source adds. “It is worth it to be with a guy like this who really cares about her so much.”

Frankly, this dude seems like a total DOWNGRADE because hello, look how hot Robin Wright is. I have a serious thing for her as Claire Underwood (but then, you’d have to be a stone not to), but yes, I know, it’s a character, not her. But still! She’s hot! What’s going on with Ben Foster? He’s like a ginger Screech with a goatee. WHATEVER. Congrats to them!

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Taylor Swift trademarked ‘This Sick Beat’

taylor swift

Taylor Swift‘s ‘Shake It Off’ did really well in the charts – and for good reason, because it’s a damn catchy song. There’s that part in the song where she talks about how “you should’ve been getting down to THIS.SICK.BEAT.” and that part was apparently so memorable to Taylor herself that she decided to trademark the phrase “this sick beat” with the United States Patent and Trademark Office. Yes, seriously.

taylor swift this sick beat

(Click for full size)

I’m not quite sure what Taylor plans to do with this trademark, to be honest – especially considering she’s hardly the first person to use the phrase “this sick beat” (though I certainly hope she’s the last). I can’t even believe they let her do this! I’m going to go and file a trademark something random, too… if only I could think of something clever.

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Justin Bieber is really sorry for being a total douchebag

justin bieber

Here’s what I want to know: who knocked some sense into Justin Bieber‘s dumb ass? For the past several years, he’s progressively become more and more of an absolute walking shitbag and it was actually starting to affect his career (read: his money). Because of this, he’s decided to turn over a new leaf and go back to being “kind and loving and gentle and soft” – his mom raised him to be a softy, after all!

This all stemmed from his appearance on The Ellen DeGeneres Show this week, which he was apparently really nervous about because he hasn’t done a public appearance for a while and he felt like everyone was judging him. That apparently gave him some food for thought and he’s a changed man now who wants your forgiveness, according to a video he posted on Facebook yesterday:

To be honest, I’m not sure where Justin is filming this video and why he’s in complete darkness and speaking in a whisper. Is he afraid some of his “hard” friends might hear him and make fun of him? It’s all so strange.

In any case, it’s hard to listen to this and be like, “Nah, fuck this kid” because he’s right – growing up in the business has GOT to be hard, and frankly he’s fared better than the likes of, say, Lindsay Lohan and co. That being said, he has been SUCH a righteous douchebag that it’s hard to take this seriously. But kids do dumb shit all the time and they grow and learn and change, and maybe someone around him DOES actually care about him enough to take the time to sort of mentor him and get him back on the right path. He wasn’t always so awful, so surely he could – if he really wanted to – return to being that humble, kind kid, right?

God, maybe *I* am turning into a softy! What do you think?

Has Justin Bieber really changed?
View Results

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Lindsay Lohan might not have finished her community service, after all

lindsay lohan

When you read earlier this week that Lindsay Lohan was in danger of going back to jail since she never completed the community service that was part of her probation terms, you probably weren’t surprised. After all, that’s just Lindsay! Of COURSE she hadn’t done what she was supposed to. But then, at the eleventh hour, she seemingly turned things around and finished her hours right in the knick of time. It was a miracle! Except it probably actually wasn’t, because the prosecutor in this case is calling bullshit on the “service” she actually performed.

Law enforcement sources tell TMZ …  prosecutor Terry White is indignant over the revelation Lindsay’s community service organization let her do ridiculous things to fulfill her obligation. As we first reported, Lindsay got credit for 18 hours for meeting and greeting fans after her London play.

And Lindsay got 70 hours credit for allowing young people to follow her around for “work shadowing experience” … pretty incredible, since she wasn’t working at the time.

We’re told White believes Lindsay had an obligation to inform the court of the types of community service she was doing. White objected to allowing Lindsay to do her community service in London for this very reason, and now we’re told he feels she’s manipulated the system and should do jail time for not completing legitimate community service.

Lindsay’s lawyer, Shawn Holley, told the judge her client merely did what she was told to do by the community service organization.

LOL STOP. Are you fucking kidding me that having kids follow her around – which she’s always had because she’s a narcissist who seeks friends who tell her how wonderful she is – while she wasn’t even working on anything was a “community service”???? And meeting and greeting fans after her play? This is a joke.

If even Chris Brown has to do “hard labor” cleaning toilets or whatever the hell he’s doing, this idiot should have to do at least the same.

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Angelina Jolie is “speechless” over conditions in Iraq

angelina jolie

Angelina Jolie does a lot of international aid work as part of her position as U.N. High Commissioner of Refugees, and recently she went over to Iraq to survey the conditions in the refugee camps there. What she saw left her “speechless” and she shared her thoughts on the trip in a new op-ed for The New York Times.

I have visited Iraq five times since 2007, and I have seen nothing like the suffering I’m witnessing now.

I came to visit the camps and informal settlements where displaced Iraqis and Syrian refugees are desperately seeking shelter from the fighting that has convulsed their region.

In almost four years of war, nearly half of Syria’s population of 23 million people has been uprooted. Within Iraq itself, more than two million people have fled conflict and the terror unleashed by extremist groups. These refugees and displaced people have witnessed unspeakable brutality. Their children are out of school, they are struggling to survive, and they are surrounded on all sides by violence.

For many years I have visited camps, and every time, I sit in a tent and hear stories. I try my best to give support. To say something that will show solidarity and give some kind of thoughtful guidance. On this trip I was speechless.

What do you say to a mother with tears streaming down her face who says her daughter is in the hands of the Islamic State, or ISIS, and that she wishes she were there, too? Even if she had to be raped and tortured, she says, it would be better than not being with her daughter.

It goes on from there, and the whole thing is really worth a read. I think sometimes it’s easy to forget about the very real effects of war not just on our own soldiers, but on regular citizens around the world who have not just lost their entire families but their homes and even their cities and everything they’ve known. It’s really heartbreaking, but I think it’s wonderful that Angelina isn’t just turning a blind eye to the difficult stuff and actually gets out there.

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