Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Lyric Breakdown: How Many Times Does Britney Sing “Baby” or “Crazy”?

You always suspected that there weren’t too many variables to a hit song, but did you have any idea how simple the average Britney Spears song is?

OK, I’m guessing maybe you did, but the sheer number of “crazies” to a song actually stunned me. Astounding!

I’ll probably be humming “oh, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby” for the rest of the afternoon, thanks.

Love It or Leave It: Stripey Friday Fun With Jennifer Love Hewitt

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What can I say, Jennifer Love Hewitt looks like she’s becoming quite the staple around here. I know a lot of you guys have no idea what I see in JLH, and up until a few months ago, I, too, would have shaken myself hard and said, “Girl, what is your deal? Bitch hasn’t been popular since I Still Know What You Did Last Summer, and dating Jamie Kennedy was probably the nail that sealed her coffin up.” But I disagree. I think she’s on the rise again, and lately, there’s nothing I love better than to stargaze at Jennifer Love Hewitt and wax poetic about her lovely attire.

Except for this. Oh never this.

Weigh in folks – love it, leave it, what?

Justin Timberlake Acoustically Cries Us a River

See? Ask and you shall receive. Justin Timberlake, after starring in a crap ton of movies, is eeking his way back into the music scene with little cameos here and there, rapping craziness with Jimmy Fallon, and now he’s taken a full stage in New York City, where he performed this spectacular version (except all the crazy bitches ‘woo!’-ing – I hate that crap when I go to a concert) of ‘Cry Me a River.’ He also did a special rendition of ‘Like I Love You.’ OK, here:

This one wasn’t nearly as awesome as ‘Cry Me a River,’ and not only because I think of the lovely Britney Spears when I hear it, either. ‘Cry Me a River’ is just some GOOD JAMS.

Did this make your Friday?

Morning Wood

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Kim Kardashian deep-throating stuff again. [The Superficial]

Can’t get enough Ryan Gosling, nope. [Lainey Gossip]

Mel B gives birth! [Bossip]

I kind of think Kate Winslet’s a liar for saying she’s never done Botox and other vomity things. [Huff Po]

Toddlers and Tiaras mom puts fake boobs and butt on four-year-old. SOMEONE NEEDS TO OFF THIS BITCH. [Cele|bitchy]

Bar Refaeli, popping out all over the place. [Starpulse]

David Beckham is already thinking about his daughter’s boyfriends. [The Frisky]

Sarah Jessica Parker‘s hands are two hundred years old. [Yeeeah]

Whoa, Mya, what have you done? [Bossip]

Seth Rogen watches Joseph Gordon-Levitt shave his head. [theBERRY]

Rihanna looks drugged-out, wears ‘c*nt’ necklace. [INFDaily]

A video of the staged Kardashian honeymoon. [Amy Grindhouse]

Justin Long, coming to a television near you. [LA Times]

The Battle of the Gucci Guccis!

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Let it be said that I’m not trendy and cool and hipster enough to know a whole lot about this Kreayshawn chick, other than she was nominated for a VMA that she did not win. And after only hearing the song a handful of times (and totally hating it each time), I was positively relieved to hear that someone else I’d never heard of had covered the atrocity that is ‘Gucci Gucci,’ and it was marginally better. Kreayshawn’s version, if you’ve never heard it:

Effing horrible, right? I mean, I actually cannot convey to you how uncomfortable the whole re-watching experience made me.

And here’s the newest cover by Neon Hitch:

Cast your votes – which hot mess is better?

View Results

Look Who’s on the Cover of Glamour UK!

photo of britney spears glamour magazine october uk 2011 pics

Remember back when Britney was trying to hightail it out of her vicious mental breakdown-and-prescription pill-and-alcohol cycle? Shit, she wasn’t even able to make the cover of Parade. But look how far she’s come! She’s on the cover of Glamour UK’s October issue, and she’s looking so, so good!

The issue hasn’t hit newsstands yet, but we have an exclusive interview snippet from Brit herself, where she discusses topics like the Royal Family and growing up.

On learning and growing and growing and learning (and turning thirty later this year):

“I think the older you get, the wiser you get. I can’t wait. I’m really excited and definitely gonna celebrate and do something spectacular. I’m gonna be in South America so I’ll have to do something pretty fun. A carnival of Britney? I don’t think I’ll be doing that! It’ll be something a little more low-key.”

On the possibility that Prince William and Kate Middleton might be fans, attending Brit’s shows:

“That would be amazing. That would be really crazy and cool. I think they’re a beautiful couple. Unfortunately I didn’t get to watch the wedding but I heard it was beautiful.”

On bringing home more cinematic gold like Crossroads (yes please!):

“I would love to do more movies and venture out into those aspects. It’s something I’m still hoping to do.”

You know, I’ve got some forever-love for you, girl, and I hope all of your dreams come true (especially that whole acting bit … I really need this to happen)!

Sightings: Megan Fox Leaves LA Hair Salon

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Oh Megs. Don’t you know that you’ve just got one of those faces that, no matter what you try to do, or what you try to wear (lol cute outfit, girl) you’re always going to be recognized? Sure.

Normally I wouldn’t run a Megan Fox gallery just because, but she’s grown on me lately, guys (is this the beginning of the end or what?) and now, looking at the fact that she’s dissociating herself from Marilyn Monroe and all of her unstableness and myriad disorders, and that she’s finally put some much-needed weight on, it quite seems like she’s growing up a little bit and it only makes me admire her. Well, more than I used to. I mean, at least way more than I admire, say, someone like the horribly misguided Courtney Stodden or those who get stupid tattoos for publicity purposes any old day.