Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Quotables: Kanye West Is The Best

A photo of Kanye West

“I am flawed as a human being. I am flawed as a person. As a man, I am flawed. BUT MY MUSIC IS PERFECT! This is the best that you’re gonna get in this lifetime, ladies and gentlemen. I’m sorry.”

At a recent concert, Kanye was nice enough to let his fans know that his music is perfect, and that no other musical artists can come close to his greatness. Yes, such moving songs as “Gold Digger,” “Stronger,” and “Love Lockdown” are “the best that you’re going to get in this lifetime.”

Wait. Kanye’s music is the best … no other music can compare … his music is the best

Oh god.

Nicole Kidman Had Some Advice for Katie Holmes

A photo of Nicole Kidman

Do you remember when Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman got divorced? I don’t, because I was too busy growing boobs and getting spitballs stuck in my hair on the bus, but I hear it was a pretty big deal. Apparently what happened was in 2001, Tom’s spokesperson announced their separation, and then two days later Tom filed for divorce. Nicole, meanwhile, was just like “what?” She was also three months pregnant when Tom filed, and she miscarried just a little bit after that. When Tom heard that news, he was (allegedly) pretty “whatever” about it. So basically it was a weird, awful situation all around, and everyone felt sorry for poor Nicole Kidman.

That’s one of the reasons why what Katie Holmes did is so awesome. And that’s also why it’s so great that Nicole called Katie up to give her a well-deserved “you go, girl!”:

Nicole Kidman has allegedly been in touch with Tom Cruise’s soon-to-be third ex-wife Katie Holmes and has reportedly told her to “stay strong”.

Last week, the Aussie actress was reportedly “laying low” after news broke that Katie was filing for divorce after five years of marriage to the ‘Mission: Impossible’ star.

Now magazine have since reported that Nicole and Katie have been in touch, with Nicole offering her advice but the magazine also reports that she was not surprised by the split which has left Hollywood in shock.

“Nicole told her to stay strong,” a source told Now magazine. “She and Katie have only spoken a handful of times, but Nicole always secretly thought she was a lot stronger than she seemed.”

They also added: “She was convinced Katie would ‘snap’ one day. She was right.”

Nicole has two children with Tom, Isabella and Connor, and after a 10 year marriage to the actor, Nicole has moved on with new husband Keith Urban and have two children together.

Since that story was published, Nicole’s rep denied it, but I don’t really buy the denial. I want to believe that Nicole thinks it’s wonderful that Tom is finally getting what’s been coming to him for a while now, and the denial was issued because she wants to keep herself out of this Scientology shitstorm as much as possible.

Here’s hoping that Katie and Nicole become united in trashing Tom to the media, and that when Tom starts looking for love again, he goes for someone who was originally on the list with Katie Holmes: Lindsay Lohan. A girl can dream, right?

Blind Item: Tom Cruise Gets Around

A photo of Tom Cruise

Yeah, I know, blind items are supposed to be blind. But some of them are just so incredibly obvious that I think it’s ok to just skip right past the initial guessing games and get straight to business. And the business this time involves Tom Cruise and his wandering penis. Are you ready?

From Blind Gossip:

When the person who appears to have the power in a relationship backs down quickly in a dispute, you know that there have to be some compelling reasons why. Although all the talk up to this point has been about his involvement with a powerful group, there were actually three other reasons he settled so quickly.

Here are the three reasons: 1. His very personal relationship with a professional athlete. 2. His very personal relationship with a musician. 3. His very personal relationship with a famous actor.

She was ready and willing to expose all three relationships to get what she wanted. The scandal of having these three famous people deposed by attorneys about their sexual relationships would have destroyed all four men. So, he gave her the thing she wanted most so that his biggest secret could remain a secret.

See what I mean? That really can’t be anyone else besides Tom and Katie, right? So who are the other people.

It seems like the professional athlete is almost definitely David Beckham. Rumors about the two of them have been going around for a while, and, well, I think that one is sort of set in stone. But the singer I’m not so sure about.

There are rumors from all the way back in 2005 that Tom and Rob Thomas, lead singer of Matchbox 20, were caught in bed together by Rob’s wife. The story is that that’s why his relationship with Katie moved so fast, because Tom’s people had to hire him a girlfriend to take attention off of any possible rumors about Tom’s sexuality. The singer could also be Will Smith though, even though I’d consider him more of an actor these days.

So Will could be the actor, too. Or the actor could be John Travolta, even though that doesn’t seem right to me. But the most popular guess for the actor is Jeremy Renner, which makes me sad, because I was starting to really like him. There are definitely some rumors about Tom and Jeremy from the set of latest Mission Impossible, so I guess it would make sense.

Any other guesses?

Nicki Minaj Is Very Serious About Proper Lawn Care

A photo of Nicki Minaj

From Hollywood Rag:

Nicki Minaj demanded the grass outside her dressing room at T in the Park be cut shorter.

The ‘Starships’ hitmaker refused to walk around her private area at the Scottish music festival last weekend because the lawn had not been trimmed sufficiently and insisted someone tackle the greenery before she would step outside.

A source told The Sun newspaper: “Nicki went mad about the grass around her area, saying it was far too long for her to walk on.

“She threw a complete strop, pouting and pointing and asking someone to get a lawnmower to sort it out.”

Nicki – who is also said to have made the same demand at the BBC Radio 1 Hackney Weekend festival in London last month – was later blasted on twitter by a fellow performer at the annual music event, which took place in Balado Park, Kinross.

Singer Frank Turner tweeted: “You can (I suppose) be a d**k to your own crew, you’re paying them. But everyone else? Not to mention the people out front. Ugh.

“To clarify: Nicki Minaj has been a selfish s***head to all the hard-working crew backstage at T. Pathetic. F**k off.”

The rapper also angered the crowd as when she eventually made it onto the stage 50 minutes late; her 30-minute performance was booed by fans after she appeared to be miming for much of it.

One fan said: “We were buzzing for the gig and it turned out to be a total joke. Disaster doesn’t even describe it.”

It’s always been fascinating to me to think about how people get this way. Like, Nicki Minaj actually thought that forcing someone to mow the grass outside of her dressing room because it was too long to walk on would be an acceptable thing to do. How is that possible? How do you have a dream job where you get to do what you’ve always wanted to do and get paid insane amounts of money for doing it and still act that way? I would imagine that it would be the opposite, that you’d just be stoked on your whole life every single day, but it seems like that’s rarely the case. And of course I get having bad days, but during the worst day possible, I can’t imagine being this rude to another human being.

What I’m saying is that for the amount of money Nicki gets paid, she can suffer through some tall grass, quit your bitchin’, walk it off, etc., etc.

Fatmire Was Just Playin’ About That Whole Baby Thing

A photo of Fatmire Sinanaj

Let’s all take a deep sigh of relief, for our dear Fatmire is actually not pregnant. She will not bear the child of Kris Humphries, for there is no Fatmy Jr. nestled in her tummy. Nope, not pregnant. Just crazy.

From TMZ:

Kris Humphries can breathe a sigh of relief — his ex-girlfriend Myla Sinanaj insists she’s NOT PREGNANT … her belly’s just naturally round.

Myla was out in Jersey earlier today, where a photog asked her straight — are you pregnant or not? Myla responded, “I am definitely not pregnant.”

What Myla DOESN’T explain is why she texted her lawyer Friday night that she WAS pregnant — and why she told numerous other people, including Kris, that she was expecting.

Myla’s latest version is that people just started talking and, “Of course, me not being a size zero kept it going.”

That, and her lying about being pregnant.

Yesterday I said that Fatmire had some pretty impressive game, but she obviously took it too far with this whole pregnancy thing. She lost any credibility that she had, which was approximately none, so I don’t know how she expects to come back from this. She’ll probably have to move on out to L.A. and make best friends with Lindsay Lohan or Paris Hilton. OR KIM KARDASHIAN.

Your future’s so bright, Fatmire!

Guess the Celebrity Offspring!

photo lily rose depp paradis pictures age pic

Wow! This one’s turned into quite a looker, wouldn’t you say? Can’t guarantee that she’s going to stay as cute as a button, though, because of that whole, pesky “two hotties make a nottie” thing, but one never does know, do they?

Here’s a few hints to get you on your way—

—Girl’s going through a turbulent time in her life right now, and I don’t mean just adolescence
—Girl’s got two way fashionable parents, though one of them could stand to lay off the eyeliner, scarves, and every accessory known to man all at one time thing
—She’s got a brother who I’d just love to lay my eyes on, too, so mad bonus points to anyone who can find recent pictures of the boy

Take another look:

photo of lily rose depp pictures
And, you know, another, if you think it’ll help you guess:

photo of lily rose depp paradis pictures recent pic
Jump in to find out who this kid belongs to!

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I’m Pretty Sure Ginny Weasley Called Off Her Wedding Because of Lily Collins

photo of lily collins and jamie campbell bower pictures
I know; I know. Her name is … wait, let me look it up again quick—her name is Bonnie Wright, but I’m telling you right now—no matter how many times I write about this cute little doll of a girl, I’m always, always, *always* going to refer to her as Ginny Weasley, because no role she could ever take on again in life could ever be as epic as the one she took in playing the sassy, street-smart, soft-hearted Ginny Weasley in the Harry Potter movies. OK? Let’s just deal.

Remember how I told you guys a few days ago that girlfriend was engaged to Jamie Campbell Bower, or ‘Caius’ from the Twilight movies? Because she was, and after being so in love and planning their wedding down to the last detail, the whole shebang was called off, and sources close to the couple claimed that the ‘ship was off, but that they were still “friends.”

Right.

And then these photos of Jamie Campbell Bower and his new costar, Lily Collins, hit the Internets, and all hell breaks loose. These two are costars on the set of an upcoming movie based on the ‘Mortal Instruments’ series, of which I know nothing about (except for what I briefly read on Wiki) and that which I probably won’t be interested in ’til 2022, because that’s generally how I (unintentionally) roll. The two play two of the film’s main characters, and have been spending—ahem—an exorbitant amount of time together, off set, according to sources.

I’ll tell you, guys, though. This Lily Collins chick? She gets around, huh? And Jamie Campbell Bower? Well. He’s got a thing for doing movies that appeal to a generally-teen audience. Harry Potter? Twilight? This Mortal Instruments business? What’s next, a play for Hunger Games stuff? Because come on.