Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Kristen Stewart And Robert Pattinson Are Getting Another Dog!

A photo of Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart

From Radar:

As holiday season approaches, Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson are looking forward to spending some much needed time together.

And RadarOnline.com has exclusively learned that the reconciled pair is planning on adopting another rescue dog.

Kristen, 22, and Robert, 26, already have Bear, a mixed mutt they adopted from a high-kill shelter in New Orleans, and now they want to find him a play pal!

“It was something they had originally planned before Kristen’s cheating scandal,” a source told RadarOnline.com.

“They were desperate for Bear to have a companion, but recent events meant they had to hold off from the idea. Just like with Bear, they’re going to scour petfinder.com, as well as a few high-kill shelters to find the perfect pal for their beloved pooch. Kristen and Robert will be spending Thanksgiving together and are hoping to have a new addition to the family before then. They haven’t got a preference with the breed, but are leaning towards the idea of a female friend for Bear.”

So this is interesting, right? Because pets are part of the family, and it’s interesting that Rob and Kristen are looking to expand their family. On one hand, people usually don’t plan on expanding their family unless they feel confident that they’re in it for the long haul, but on the other hand, people have babies sometimes to “fix” a relationship, right? So can the same thing be said for animal babies?

Basically, I just need to know if this is a sign that things are going well for these two, or if this is a sign that everything’s about to go to shit all over again. Because I really, really don’t want to be as unprepared as I was last time.

Let Gwyneth Paltrow Supply You with All Your Holiday Needs

A photo of Gwyneth Paltrow

It’s that time of year, friends. It’s the time when a great deal of us will give and receive gifts to celebrate a significant religious event or to go along with other people who are celebrating a significant religious event so we can get presents too, or just because it feels nice to decorate trees and bake cookies and feel like other people actually believe in peace on earth and goodwill towards men. It’s The Holidays, friends. The big ones.

And that’s where Gwyneth Paltrow comes in. She understands the situation that a lot of you are in: you’re poor people with no sense of style or decorum, but you still have to give presents to people so they’ll still like you and invite you to their parties. She understands, and she wants to help. And that’s why she wants you to buy this shit on her site!

If you go on over to Goop, you can check out the holiday items that Gwyneth has to offer. There aren’t any elaborate gifts or anything like that, no, Gwyneth wants you to focus on the important stuff. And that’s the presentation.

Here are some cards that she wants you to buy. There are ten of them, and, as you can see, they read “Happy Everything,” so you can send them to pretty much whoever. And all ten cards come with that nice brown envelope pictured! For just $30, these cards can be yours:

But here’s the big thing: the presents! They need to be presented well, and they need to look good. And that’s why you need this Goopy wrapping paper! If you order this, you get four whole rolls of reversible paper, and 18 whole tags! The best part? It will just cost you $52! Check it out:

Does it feel like we’re forgetting something? It’s because we are! It’s those wonderful holiday family portraits! Gwyneth isn’t about to leave you high and dry on that front, so she’s offering you a pack of 50 cards (all with their own envelopes again!), and all you have to do is slap your picture on it and send it off! This little package will only run you $150. But, as you can see, it’s so worth it:

A photo of Gwyneth Paltrow

Thanks, Gwyneth! You never fail us!

Quotables: Khloe Kardashian Talks Body Image

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I tried to cut out a lot of sweets. And I love … cheese. [Cheese] is not a sweet, but …. I don’t care. [I like] cheese on anything, I don’t care. … [I] binge eat and cry. … It’s always going to be a lifelong thing for me. And I’m not where I want to be. When I used to do things like crash diets or things too fast, it never stuck because it wasn’t a lifestyle change, so for this, I’m working out consistently like three to five days a week … It’s been harder. But I’m just changing my diet slowly.

Khloe Kardashian on her relationship with food and dieting, God love her. I seriously wonder if she feels the way she feels about herself and her body because she worries what people think about her and her body, or if it’s really something that bothers her on a deeper level. Because while I’m not all on board with people destroying themselves through substances (whether it be drugs, alcohol, or edibles), I AM on board with people doing whatever the f-ck they want with their bodies as long as it’s not harming anyone else. I mean, seriously. What’s so wrong with having a few extra pounds? Why’s it such a big deal when people love food? Why does there have to be anything wrong with the person who loves nothing more than to sit down to watch Monday Night Football with a cornucopia of stuff to graze on, having it make them happy?

Seriously, are there not much, much worse things in life than people who derive serious joy from food?

thePMlinks

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Miley Cyrus is offered a lucrative role in a porn movie. [The Superficial]

Drew Barrymore is low-class? [Lainey Gossip]

More baby news! [Starpulse]

Random hotties. [theBERRY]

No Doubt’s video sucked and was offensive so it was pulled. [Socialite Life]

Joe Simpson denies the gay stuff. [Cele|bitchy]

Kristen Stewart makeup fail. [Yeeeah]

Rita Rusic’s ass. [Moe Jackson]

Well Ciara Price is attractive. [College Poison]

Rihanna is “Unapologetic.” (Over Chris Brown.) [Hollywood PQ]

Kristen Bell is pregnant. [IDLYITW]

Erin Heatherton’s hottest self-shots, because now she’s back on the market. [G Celeb]

Kathy Griffin and Cher talk Mitt Romney. [OMGBlog]

Will Ferrell’s campaign video. [Bitten and Bound]

The Barack Squad. [Huff Po]

Leo wanted to be single for his birthday. [Lainey Gossip]

Chris Brown is all philanthropic now. [The Superficial]

Taylor Swift is a Plagiarist

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One thing I never get sick of is hearing about—and subsequently writing—negative Taylor Swift press. It really gets me going in a way that coffee just can’t. It’s a visceral ‘zing!’; an instant high. And in this case? Well, this might last me for the rest of the day. Taylor Swift—the very precious, darling, innocent Taylor Swift—has been accused of ripping off lyrics from another artist. The songwriter in question is Matt Nathanson, and Taylor’s never made it a secret that she really, really admires his work, but this time, she’s admired it so hard that it somehow ended up verbatim in one of her songs.

Taylor’s most recent single, ‘All Too Well’, has a lyric that states … well, this: “and I forget about you long enough to forget why I needed to.” And Nathanson wrote a song back in 2003 called ‘I Saw’, and it has a lyric in it that says this: “and I’ll forget about you long enough to forget why I need to.” The only real difference, you see, is that Taylor went and changed the word “needed” to “need” and “I’ll” to “I.” Because that takes all copyright infringements away, right? Yeah, I guess she would think that.

It gets better, though—when Nathanson saw that Taylor had ripped one of his lyrics, he didn’t just sit back and take the flattery: he took his gripe to Twitter, where followers of Taylor positively tried to eviscerate Matt, telling him he was a prick. This is what Matt had to say on Twitter that set Taylor’s followers afire:

“She’s definitely a fan… and now she’s a thief.”

Can I tell you how hard I love this? Reps for Taylor have yet to release a statement, but I hope to God that Matt Nathanson has the balls to go forward and file a lawsuit or a claim or something against this silly little ho, because really. STICK IT TO TAYLOR SWIFT.

Kate Upton Did Vogue Italia and Here’s the Photos

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You know, I’m kind of really torn between whether I think Kate Upton’s totally hot, or whether Kate Upton just has a totally hot body. Because she’s gone and scored a spread in Vogue Italia, and to do that, one really must be extraordinarily beautiful, and Kate … well, she’s cute. With a banging bod. And she doesn’t really do high fashion all that well, because she doesn’t really have a Cocaine Kate kind of face, you know?

Take these photos, for example. They’re hot. They’re completely and totally hot. But are they seriously for real? I mean, in one of the pictures (you can check them out in the gallery), Kate’s entire tit is hanging out of her dress. I mean, f-cker is OUT. It’s not a demure little nipslip, and it’s not a “Woops! I’m trying to keep it all in, here!”—her TIT is OUT of the DRESS. And in another photo, she’s reclining on a chair, in a leather all-in-one, and she’s spread-eagle.

So in short, OK. If gangly tits all hanging out of clothing is the new high-fashion, then yes. These photos of Kate Upton for Vogue Italia are right on the money. But if not? Well. The joke’s on somebody; I just can’t, for the life of me, figure out who.

Ke$ha Cleans Up Nicely Vol. II (or, “Ke$ha Didn’t Sleep With Bieber Vol. I”)

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See, I don’t get why girlfriend can’t look like this more often. Yeah, there’re photos later in the set (not pictured) where it looks like the guy in the picture (Ke$ha‘s bodyguard) is holding her up for fear that her drunk (?) ass might fall down at any given second, but she looks pretty, right? And it would appear that her new liver-lips went and deflated a little bit, so there’s that, too.

But doubtless you’re not here to discuss whether or not Ke$ha’s sober—you want to know about the Bieber tie and how Ke$ha didn’t sleep with Bieber. Well, here’s the thing: Ke$ha appeared on Australia’s Hot30 Countdown earlier today, and casually mentioned that she didn’t sleep with Bieber. And it’s really just that simple. Here’s what she had to say to the Aussies:

“I have not, for the record, ever slept with Justin Bieber. More than that, he has a girlfriend who is really, really hot, so… I think he’s sorted.”

And later during the interview, she talked about being buddies with Miley Cyrus, to whom she gifted a hairy lollipop:

“One of my dancers had clip-in weaves, so I clipped the weave onto a used lollipop — well, I had to lick it so it would stick. I really put a lot of thought into that. I thought she’d like it.”

Oh that Ke$ha, you guys. Isn’t she just a barrel of licked monkeys?