Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Gwyneth Paltrow doesn’t care if you and Martha Stewart hate her

gwyneth paltrow

Gwyneth Paltrow is basically THE WORST and we all know it – like, literally all of us, including Martha Stewart. In fact, Martha recently laid down some home truths to Gwyn, saying that homegirl needs to stick to acting and stop trying to be some lifestyle/homemaking guru like Martha herself. Gwyneth’s response? The methinks-she-doth-protest-too-much “I don’t really care, I’m just being me” rant, which includes a healthy dose of, “She’s just insecure!” bullshit.

Here’s what she had to say at Fortune’s Most Powerful Women Summit on Tuesday:

First of all, no one has ever said anything bad about me before, so I’m shocked and devastated. I’ll try to recover. [Laughs]

If I’m really honest, I’m so psyched that she sees us as competition. I’m so psyched. I really am.

I think that when anybody criticizes anyone, it’s revealing more about where they are in time and space as opposed to where you are in time and space. I think generally we tend to lash out if we’re in a, you know it’s usually a reflection of something else. At this point in my life I don’t take it personally. I see it as a projection. And if there’s ever anything that sticks then I know, “oh, I’m holding this judgment against myself and I need to look at that.” And you know sometimes I learn good things from criticism.

To be fair, I mean, I guess she handled it already. How else can you respond to an ice cold diss like the one Martha laid down? However, to say it’s a “projection” – that Martha Stewart has ANYTHING to be intimidated by when in comparison to Gwyneth Paltrow – is so fucking high and mighty I could smack her. Nice try, Gwyenth.

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Amanda Bynes caught shoplifting twice in one day

amanda bynes

Amanda Bynes has been living it up in New York City, it seems – wearing band-aids on her face, announcing fake engagements, clawing fans on the arm and now shoplifting… twice in a day!

From TMZ:

According to our sources, employees at Pookie & Sebastian began following Bynes around the store because she was acting suspicious. We’re told they didn’t recognize it was Amanda, and just thought she was a “half-naked, homeless crackhead.”

Customers tell us Bynes was dancing and muttering about plastic surgery — but eventually she tried to bolt with a shirt stuffed between her arms. When an employee stopped her and asked if she was going to pay, Amanda said … “Do I really have to buy this?”

The answer, of course, was yes — and we’re told Bynes was actually cooperative … whipping out a credit card to cover the $128.

Earlier in the day, she was accused of stealing a $200 hat from Barney’s since, you know, she put it on her head and then tried walking out of the store with it on without paying for it. In the real world, we call that stealing. In Amanda’s world, it’s a misunderstanding.

“I was walking out of the store to get my handbag out of the car,” Bynes, 28, told PEOPLE on the phone Wednesday. “I had been harassed by a man – a man and this woman were basically trying to take my picture inside the store, and so I asked them to stop taking it, but they wouldn’t … They were like paparazzi but undercover.”

Bynes says one of the security guards knew she was leaving and would be back but that there was a miscommunication with another guard.

“I walked out of the store, and the sensor went off,” she says. “I didn’t realize I was wearing my cap. And the cap – I was purchasing it, and I was actually still shopping.”

Bynes also confirms the store asked her not to return. “I basically just had to leave,” she says. “They said, ‘Please, just don’t shop at Barneys anymore.’ But oh well. It’s fine.”

Yeah, except when you’re going to get your purse, you don’t take the merchandise you haven’t paid for with you. You get your wallet and then you come back in and pay for it, and THEN you get to take it. That’s the way shopping works.

Then again, this is just another example of why it’s so disastrous for this girl to be off her meds – she’s obviously mentally ill, thinking that “undercover” paparazzi are trying to follow her (especially when she purposely invites that attention half the time, anyway). It’s such a shame, but this is all just going to keep going further and further downhill.

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Paula Patton finally filed for divorce from Robin Thicke

paula patton robin thicke

Praise the Lord, y’all – it’s truly a day for even the non-religious among us to be thankful to a higher power, because Paula Patton has FINALLY filed for divorce from scumbag husband Robin Thicke. They’ve been separated since February, but Paula decided to stew and let Robin humiliate himself for a few months before finally filing the paperwork earlier this month.

From People:

There are no blurred lines about it: Paula Patton has officially filed for divorce from her husband Robin Thicke.

Patton – who married Thicke in 2005 – cited “irreconcilable differences” in papers filed in Los Angeles on Oct. 3 and is asking for joint custody of their son, Julian Fuego, 4.

Personally, I don’t think Robin is particularly fit to be around children on his own – especially with his recent behaviour – but I guess they can work that one out for themselves.

Selena Gomez, take note – even if it takes years, you can eventually love yourself (or at the very least, respect yourself) enough to get rid of the shitbags in your life.

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Adele still makes £80,000 a day despite her last album being 4 years old

adele

Adele is RICH. Like really, really rich, thanks to the success of her last album, 21. Which, by the way, is four years old at this point (can you believe it?!). However, despite the fact that she hasn’t toured or done much of of anything at all in the past couple of years, professionally speaking, she still makes a whopping £80,000 PER DAY. That’s the equivalent of about $128k, by the way.

From HeatWorld:

The record earned her £54million the 22 months up until December 2013 through her companies Melted Stone and Melted Stone Publishing.

Melted Stone made £30million over 14 months up until April 2013 with another £8million throughout the rest of the year and Adele paid herself a dividend of £5.2million in the second half of 2013 with a salary of £5.6million in the first half and £2.86million in the latest accounting period.

Her company Melted Stone Publishing made £14.4million and between them the two firms made £13.1 million profit which is a nice little sum for Adele to keep under her bed.

That’s… insane. And I need Adele to cut me a check real quick. No wonder she’s not in a hurry to release her next album!

 

Chelsea Handler exposed her left breast to promote an interview

chelsea handler

Chelsea Handler is going to be doing an interview with Dave Grohl on Sirius XM on Monday, and she really, really wants people to listen. Like, so much so that she’ll show you her entire left breast if that’ll make a difference at all. Chelsea posted the photo, in which she appears sitting on a motorbike next to three friends, on Twitter. I’ll throw it below the cut for those of you at work.

So uh, tune in to Chelsea’s Town Hall on Monday?

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Jessica Chastain used to get called “ugly” every day

jessica chastain

Jessica Chastain is undoubtedly a beautiful woman, but it seems her peers didn’t always think so. Like many kids, she was bullied a lot for her appearance and was apparently called ugly every day, as she revealed in a new interview with Glamour.

“[As a child] I was told every day at school that I was ugly. And that no one wanted to be my friend. The most cruel things. If I can do anything to help young girls and to be a cheerleader for people who sometimes have low self-esteem, I want to do that.”

Chastain also admitted that she was happy not to have grown up in the Hollywood spotlight:

“I would have been a disaster…if I was 19 and I had the attention that I’m getting now. I would have just said stupid things. I would have partied more. All these expensive dinners and people giving me champagne? All these stupid things that we criticize 19-year-olds for doing when they’re famous, I would have done.”

Ha, good point. Who wouldn’t get involved in that stupid shit? At least it all seems to have worked out for her now!

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Amanda Bynes went crazy and clawed a fan in NYC

amanda bynes

Amanda Bynes is currently off her meds and haunting New York City with her bizarre behaviour, and it seems things took an even stranger (and violent) turn on Monday night at an event held at the Gilded Lily nightclub in Chelsea, where she apparently went crazy on a fan who got too close.

From TMZ:

Multiple sources tell TMZ … Amanda showed up by herself to an event at the Gilded Lily nightclub Monday night in Chelsea. We’re told she was dancing alone, wearing sunglasses and keeping to herself … until random people started taking photos.

At first, Amanda was just yelling at the fans … but we’re told she finally snapped on one woman who claims Bynes spun toward her violently, scratching her neck and arms. Despite the alleged attack … the woman tells us she’s still a fan and doesn’t plan to press charges.

There are pictures of the fan’s injuries at the source, and they are pretty visible. No idea what the hell made her go violent, but if she’s losing it like that on a fan and she’s still walking around unmedicated, it’s only a matter of time before someone gets more seriously hurt, I feel. Countdown to her next 5150 hold starts now…

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