3Oh God The Cringe: Texts Between Charlie Sheen and Farrah Abraham

Charlie Sheen has a passion for getting involved with troubled young women; he’s basically the Princess Diana of our time. Farrah Abraham, determined nobody, following her “f-ck it, what else could go wrong” way of life, decided to reach out to him. For his dong, basically. She texted him suggesting they go out for a “playdate” — WITH their kids, NOT a euphemism — but way to rub it in Sheen’s face that he doesn’t have custody of his kids. She also suggested coffee, to which Sheen replied with the only thing he’s said I’ll ever agree with,

Coffee is for amateurs and grandma.

TMZ has screencaps of the texts. I can’t really read them, the cringe is too extreme. Farrah, girl, calm your texts.

I’m just going to assume these are real, for the sake of entertainment and train wreck potential.

June 13, 2013 at 4:30 pm by Catherine St. Ives

4Johnny Depp’s Ex Is Super Skeptical Of His Girlfriend

Johnny Depp may or may not be engaged to his (ex?) girlfriend Amber Heard, but if he’s not, rumor is he’s planning on it. No doubt this is greatly disappointing to Ke$ha, but Mr. Depp’s ex, Vanessa Paradis, may have some issues with it as well.

Here’s the latest from my favorite, National Enquirer:

Vanessa Paradis, Johnny’s partner for 14 years before they split a year ago, is afraid that their two kids will grow too attached to Amber and get hurt when the relationship falls apart.

“Vanessa doesn’t care for Amber at all,” said a source. “She’s convinced that Amber’s trying to get her hooks into Johnny and his money by getting him to propose. But Vanessa doesn’t believe it’s going to last, and that’s why she’s against Johnny marrying Amber. She thinks their kids will be crushed when the relationship goes south. Vanessa thinks he’s smitten because Amber’s so exotic and says he’ll grow tired of her,” added the source. “But before he does, he just might pop the question – and that’s the last thing Vanessa wants.”

I’m sorry, but fighting over Johnny Depp is SO 1998. Dude looks like a hobo.

I don’t know if I buy this story. Ms. Paradis is doing great. She had an album drop last month, looked great at Cannes, and has a new film coming out.  And she said she’s pretty much over it. Not that celebrities can’t change their minds and experience heartache and all that. I get it, they’re ~~real people~~ too. But better. The real truth to this story is that you don’t find much publicity about Amber Heard without having Johnny Depp’s name tied to it. And weirdly, I can’t find any recent photos of the two of them together.

June 13, 2013 at 3:30 pm by Catherine St. Ives

0Demi Lovato’s Airing Out Simon Cowell With Some Candid Pics

Simon Cowell is still a bit of a stud – mostly because he’s filthy rich rather than their love of that hedgehog hair and those cheap ass white t-shirts – and Demi Lovato, one of his co-judges on The X Factor US put him on blast on Twitter yesterday when she posted the following early candid shot of him:

HAHAHA! Love it. Don’t know where Demi dug that one up, but it’s a classic. She also posted some fan art… or something. I don’t know what else you would even call this:

I like Simon – I tend to find him the sanest judge on any show he’s on and he tells it like it is. I also like his rapport with Demi and the fact that she gives him a hard time, but I’m ashamed of myself for even caring enough about this to find it at all amusing.

June 13, 2013 at 2:30 pm by Jennifer

0Chris Hemsworth Has Been Changed By Fatherhood

Chris Hemsworth and wife Elsa Pataky had a gorgeous little girl, India Rose, last year and the experience of being a father has been a life-changing one for the actor. You know, as you do. However, this baby is so cute I can’t even hate on his standard sound-bite answers because AWWWW.

From E! Online:

The actor chatted with E! News last night at the XBox E3 party in Los Angeles about parenthood and what he’s got planned for Father’s Day this Sunday.

“I think I’ll be working,” he told us.

“But I’ll see her at some stage, definitely, have breakfast or something,” Hemsworth added. “She’s a bit young to make me breakfast. She’s only 1.”

Although little India Rose can’t whip up a batch of pancakes or cook her dad a nice omelette just yet, she’s made a strong impact on her pops from the moment she entered this world.

“Yeah, for the better,” the actor said in response to whether fatherhood has changed him. “It puts things into perspective.”

I’m sure a lot of ladies will fall even more in love with Chris after this. He’s not a bad looking guy himself.

June 13, 2013 at 12:30 pm by Jennifer

2LeAnn Rimes Swears She Never Had An Eating Disorder

LeAnn Rimes, one half of America’s #4 most hated couple, went to rehab last year, as you probably remember. Everyone sorta figured at the time that it was because she had an eating disorder since she had pretty much gone down to skin and bones, but she swore it was for “emotional issues” or something of the sort, if I remember right.

Anyway, since she’s running out of steam (for now) on the Brandi Glanville post-affair drama, she’s switched to talking about her time in rehab and she wants everyone to know (again): she never had an eating disorder! Yeah, okay.

From The Wendy Williams Show:

“I can honestly say, 100%, I’ve never had a problem with eating. Trust me.”

She added: “It was just stress, I mean I was really going through anxiety and stress and depression. That’s what I was going through. It was just my body’s way of dealing with it.”

Well, yeah, but anxiety and stress and depression can trigger an eating disorder. Not that I’m in a place to medically diagnose someone I’ve never met with something so serious, but that shit looked dangerous, not simply a little “I’m too busy to remember to eat lunch” problem.

Anyhoo, here’s hoping she go her shit together – she looks a lot better these days. You can watch her interview below if you feel like it.

June 13, 2013 at 11:30 am by Jennifer

0Is Sandra Bullock Playing Miss Hannigan In The Upcoming ‘Annie’ Remake?

I don’t mind me a bit of Sandy Bullock – her movies are inoffensive enough and she seems like a pretty sweet lady and a decent actress. Plus, her baby, Louis, is absolutely adorable. Not sure why that gives her added credibility, but it does, so let’s just go with it. In any case, she’s got an exciting new role coming down the pipe, maybe: Miss Hannigan in Sony’s Annie remake.

From The Hollywood Reporter:

Sandra Bullock is in early talks to join Jamie Foxx and Quvenzhané Wallis in Annie, the update of the classic comic strip-turned-musical that Sony is making with producers Will Smith and Jay-Z.

Bullock would play Miss Hannigan, the mean lady who runs the orphanage inhabited by Annie (Wallis) and her friends. (Foxx will play a modern incarnation of Daddy Warbucks, a billionaire named Benjamin Stacks.)

But that is only if a deal is made. Bullock and the studio were in talks in March, but the actress ultimately passed at the time. Now the two sides are back at the table.

I’m sort of in support of this, but a little confused about the casting of this movie all-around. I love little Q, so I’m in on that front, but I’ve never really liked Jamie Foxx very much, to be honest. Also, the 1982 version is so classic so I’m not really sure why we need a remake. Can’t people leave well enough alone?

June 13, 2013 at 10:30 am by Jennifer