Today's Evil Beet Gossip

Orlando Bloom Gets Himself a Booty

Various sources have reported that Orlando Bloom has moved on to Esquire’s “Sexiest Woman Alive” Jessica Biel. Oh Kate Bosworth. He fell for you when you were the buff hottie from “Blue Crush” and now that you have morphed into a another Hollywood stick figure, you are outta the picture. I don’t know if Kate is doing this to herself on purpose or if she really has a problem. All I know is that I have respect for Orlando going for a girl with some junk in the trunk. Shake that booty.

The Price is Wrong, BITCH!

After 35 years hosting the game show, Bob Barker will retire from The Price is Right next June. “I will be 83 years old on December 12, and I’ve decided to retire while I’m still young,” the beloved daytime personality told the Associated Press. “I’m just reaching the age where the constant effort to be there and do the show physically is a lot for me.”

I’m not even going to try to find an original way to make the “price is wrong” joke here, since none of the 5000 bloggers who tried did very well with it anyway. Instead, I’m including this video of the Bob Barker scene in Happy Gilmore. You know the one.

I’ll also link to a little montage the kids at College Humor put together awhile back, just to remind Barker what he’s walking away from: the best bouncing boobs in the program’s long history (or at least the portion of it available digitally). I just have to note that the girl with the HUGEST boobs in the SMALLEST shirt hails from my very own alma mater, Arizona State University.