Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Taylor Swift

Looks Like This Whole Swyllengift Thing Might Be For Real

photo of taylor swift being romantic making heart signs with her hands pictures

Yeah, ‘Swyllengift.’  You heard it here first.  Totally made it up myself. Before coffee. So I haven’t even had a breath’s time to decide whether or not it sucks, or if I’m going to start referring to Jake Gyllenhaal and Taylor Swift as … Swyllengift. I mean, fuck. It’s better than Brangelina … Or worse, Bennifer. Do y’all remember the original Bennifer (Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez)? Those were some great days for gossip. The really seedy, voyeuristic part of me would like to see them both leave their spouses and hook back up, complete with pink and yellow diamonds and furs and the way that fake baking looks on Irish boys with large jaws who try too hard. I mean, marriage with Garner is pretty much almost out of the picture anyway, isn’t it?

Anyway, half of the couple I’m most fascinated with these days (Taylor Swift and Jake Gyllenhaal) appeared on today’s Ellen DeGeneres Show and of course, Ellen pushed Taylor for details on the relationship in that oh-so-coy way that she has. From People:

“Are you optimistic about love? How do you feel about love right now?” DeGeneres, addressing the topic at hand, asks Swift on The Ellen DeGeneres Show episode airing Monday.

“I’m always optimistic about love,” responds Swift 20.

Confirming Swift’s stance, DeGeneres repeats, “So you’re always optimistic about love?”

“Yes, always, sometimes,” says Swift, beginning to backtrack slightly.

“But right now you are?” asks DeGeneres.

“Well, why wouldn’t anyone be?” says Swift, before DeGeneres boldly states, “Especially if your boyfriend is Jake Gyllenhaal, because he is very handsome.”

But, DeGeneres concludes, “Y’all are just hanging out though, right?”

Swift acknowledges that she and Gyllenhaal were photographed together in New York last weekend. As the singer says to DeGeneres, “You have a picture of us on the [TV] screen, don’t you?”

“Right,” admits DeGeneres. “But it’s just y’all hanging out – this does not prove anything. I’m just saying he’s adorable and I like him very much, and so if that is the case that he’s your boyfriend, I think that’s fantastic.”

So, good. More of these non-details that continuously confirm that Swift and Gyllenhaal are dry humping, because I don’t see Taylor givin’ it up just yet. And by the way, Donnie Darko was on television last night. That a fucked up movie or what?

Taylor Swift Has Moved Past John Mayer, Sets Sights on Jake Gyllenhaal

photo of taylor swift and jake gyllenhaal dating apple picking pictures

Now this is a couple I could get behind! And I’m not joking! While I’m not a big Taylor Swift fan (her music is a little bit … young for me), she seems like a level-headed, down-to-earth girl who tries to live her life as normally as possible, while being a crazy, notebook-doodling, romantic fool for love. And you know, I actually think it’s pretty sweet. I mean, she’s like Stevie Nicks. … Just without all of those hard, hard drugs. And all of those hard, hard drugs. Did I mention the drugs?

Anyway, Us magazine has apparently got the scoop on the new relationship, and it’s exactly as schmoopy-lovey as you’d think it’d be, coming from two of Hollywood’s most maternal and paternal young figures. The first date? Apple picking. Yup. Apple picking. And then Jake and Taylor went and helped out at a soup kitchen, adopted a half-blind three-legged dog from their local chapter of the Humane Society and gave it to a terminal cancer patient in a children’s ward, and performed a cabaret version of The Lion King for a local Veteran’s home, all to raucous applause.

I’m kidding about the dog and the Vets, but I’m serious about the apple picking. This is apparently what they did. And you know what? Good for them. I think it’s actually pretty sweet, and I hope that these rumors turn out to be true. Because then, I will probably pay way more attention to Taylor Swift and her doings. And I’m just positive that she’d be thrilled over that.

Which Actress Do You Think Taylor Swift is Dissing in Her New Song?

Taylor Swift is famous for writing some seriously literal song lyrics, so now of course we’re all obsessed with who and what she could be writing about now that most of the people she interacts with are famous. We know she wrote that one song for Kanye (my eyes are still rolling, bitch), it’s rumored that “Dear John” is about her fling with John Mayer (although I’d be surprised if she didn’t have the decency to at least give him a fake name), and now I’m hearing about this other song, “Better Than Revenge”, in which Taylor sings, “She’s an actress/But she’s better known for the things that she does on the mattress.”

Damn. Harsh words, Miss Swift. Not very X-tian of you to go calling people slutty, justsayin’, justsayin’.

So who do we think she’s talking about? I mean, yo, she could be talking about Demi Lovato or Jennifer Aniston. There’s a lot of room to speculate here.

Who do you think Taylor be singing about?

Taylor Swift Has Something Not Boring Happen to Her

I kid, I kid. Taylor swift is a good girl. She’s well-rounded and mannerly and down to earth. She’s a good role model for young women, as opposed to the likes of, you know, Lindsay Lohan or something.

However, it looks like she’s in a little bit of a legal pickle right now, as her former manager is suing her for possible royalty rights and unpaid wages.

Swift’s former manager Dan Dymtrow says that he’s suing her for millions, because he was solely responsible for her discovery, and he was also the one who helped skyrocket her career to its current superstar fame.

After Dymtrow officially began the lawsuit process, legal reps for Taylor came forward and claimed that Dymtrow’s wants are out of the question:

“For him to claim that her success and her major contracts were procured by him is ludicrous. And even if there were some merit to his claims, paying him on the contract would defeat the whole purpose of the law in New York, which is to protect minors who sign contracts.”

So, really, this leaves me kind of baffled. I get what Taylor’s reps are saying in that this guy might not be responsible for her current contracts with major recording labels and advertisers and what not, but what’s this ‘protecting minors’ clause in the referenced contract? Is Taylor (or her parents) trying to screw this guy and hide behind ‘I was a minor!’ in order to avoid paying him his dues? Thoughts?

Taylor Swift is Still Pissed at Kanye, BTW

Taylor Swift and Kanye West at the Video Music Awards

Speaking of Kanye, he’s continued to make strides toward making nice with Taylor Swift after he crashed her VMA acceptance speech last year, but they’re not exactly having the desired effect.

Kanye said he wanted to work on a song with Taylor and that he’d actually already written something for her to perform, which he obviously considers to be extremely generous offer. Kanye has the biggest ego in the game.

Thing is, homegirl writes her own music and considers his offer to be an insult. A friend of Taylor was reported as saying, “It’s just another insult that this fool thinks she would sing a song he wrote. His ego is out of control. If anything, Kanye should be singing a song that Taylor wrote, not the other way around. As far as Taylor is concerned, he can take his song and shove it.”

It doesn’t seem likely that Kanye will “shove” anything any time soon (prostitutes into a jacuzzi maybe, but certainly not the “it” that Taylor’s friend speaks of), but if his head wasn’t submerged so deep inside of his own ass, he would have remembered that Taylor’s obviously a songwriter. No doi, bro. She can’t even sing, Kanye. Sounding familiar?

So, yeah. I wouldn’t count on any epic “Taylor Swift and Kanye West ‘We’re Totally Cool Now’” performances at the VMAs tomorrow.

Taylor Swift Continues To Do Mundane Shit

These photos of Taylor Swift filming her new music video in Maine over the weekend have surfaced and look, guys! It’s more of that sappy all-American cheeseball romance bullshit that she always does. I just want to point something out here: This girl is like, 20 years old. On no planet is there a 20 year old woman who is internationally successful who also got married in a chapel to her high school sweetheart. There just isn’t. Taylor Swift, you cannot have the kind of love you sing about and be as successful as you are at the age of 20. Grow the fuck up!

Another Overrated Celebrity Is Down With Milk

Taylor Swift Loves Milk

photo via JustJared

Taylor Swift’s milk mustache ad came out today and boy oh boy, is it just as boring as the rest of them! When these ads first came out, they were weird in a good way and seemed kind of innovative, but now it’s just like, a standard. Everyone in Hollywood does the cover of Entertainment Weekly, then they get a milk mustache ad, then they get a star on the Walk of Fame. If they’re unlucky, there’s a sex tape and comeback tour sandwiched somewhere in between the milk ad and the star. Yawn-status.