Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Taylor Swift

Taylor Swift Performs “Iris” with The Goo Goo Dolls

I promised myself I would stop, I really did. I promised myself that I would cut back on my cattiness towards Taylor Swift, especially for her horrendous covers. I said “Emily, what are you doing? What good does it do to go on about your resentment of a popular yet only marginally talented country singer?” And I stopped.

Well, for like a month. Then I saw this video of Taylor performing with my beloved Goo Goo Dolls, and I’m sorry, but all bets are off. Because much like the cast of Glee covering a Bowie song, it just got a little too personal.

How are you guys feeling about this here video? Either I’m a jealous bitch or Taylor is too ridiculous, am I right?

Taylor Swift Refuses to Stop Performing Awful Covers

So what cover did Taylor go with this time? Another rap song? Perhaps some more shitty country? Killing my spirit with a half ass take on one of my favorites?

None of the above! Instead, Taylor went with Switchfoot’s “Dare You to Move,” because of course she did.

I just don’t like her. I’m sorry. You can get all in a tizz over how popular she is and how many awards she’s gotten and how sweet she is, and that’s fine, those are all facts, but none of those things mean that she’s a talented, precious gift to this world. She gets on my nerves. And that’s ok.

Are you loving Taylor’s latest musical stylings?

Katherine Heigl’s Best Friends Include Taylor Swift and Jon Bon Jovi

A photo of Katherine Heigl

Who would have thunk it, right? I thought Taylor Swift was too sweet and Jon Bon Jovi was too awesome to cavort with the likes of Katherine Heigl, but it looks like I was wrong. If you hear Katherine tell it, she’s the most friendly lady in all the land:

When Katherine wasn’t busy filming [for New Year’s Eve, she joined husband Josh Kelly on the road where he was touring with Taylor Swift … and the two blondes totally hit it off.

“I adore that girl,” Katherine told us on the carpet. “I was so excited to meet her! I tried to keep it cool but after chatting for only 20 minutes I was like ‘we’re best friends now!’ She is so sweet and down to earth.”

Coincidentally, Taylor was in the NYE prequel Valentine’s Day. Heigl has been hamming it up with musicians everywhere. In New Year’s Eve, the former Grey’s Anatomy star gets up close and personal with Jon Bon Jovi.

“I play a caterer that gets the gig to cater the big, fancy New Year’s Eve party in New York,” she told us. “Her ex-boyfriend, played by Jon Bon Jovi, is a very famous, big-time musician, comes back to play Times Square.”

“And yes, we totally make out,” laughed Katherine.

“It’s really interesting talking to Jon about his career and all the little things that I now know about from my husband, like the lingo and when you’re touring, how do you feel bout your rider,” Heigl laughed, adding: “I dropped in as much music lingo as I could!”

Ugh. Is that the most irritating nonsense you’ve ever heard or what? Seriously, is it? Sometimes someone just bugs me to the point where everything they ever say or do or wear or think is ridiculous and annoying and awful. I’m human too, ok?!

Taylor Swift Has a Concert, T.I. (… Wait, What?) Joins Her On Stage

First. UNNHH. How hot is T.I.? I’m not one to crush on the rapper-types, as I find a lot of them kind of pretentious and crappy and self-involved, but T.I. is HOT HOT HOT. Taylor Swift, on the other hand? Well. I don’t know. Not so much. You know how we kind of collectively feel about Taylor Swift around these parts, so I’ll give her a free pass on this one and move on to the good points. How about all that screaming? I didn’t know there were many Taylor Swift fans that were also T.I. fans, and vice versa.

Sorry about the poor audio. You know how it goes sometimes.

Love It or Leave It: Taylor Swift Is A Hot Crocheted Mess

A photo of Taylor Swift

You guys, of course the title of “Love It or Leave It” is just a formality. Of course we’re leaving it, we’re leaving it back at our great-grandmother’s house on her coffee table where it belongs.

Taylor Swift, honestly. What is this girl doing with herself these days? I’ll tell you what: nothing good. I mean, Tay-Tay seems sweet and everything, but there is just something about her that gets on my last nerve, you know? Anybody else?

Taylor Swift Got A Tattoo!

A photo of Taylor Swift

Oh, you guys! I’m just joshing! Taylor Swift just wrote on her arm because she got bored in 4th period and her friend Jessica was like “OMG, Tay, let me give you a tattooooooooo!” And Taylor was like “awesome, do it, do you think Brad will notice?” And Jessica was like “OMG OMG OMG!”*

I mean, I don’t have any hard evidence that that’s how this silliness happened, but that’s just what I’m going to go with.

Can you tell what Taylor has scribbled on her arm in marker? It’s a Dixie Chicks lyric:

Tell me everything I want to hear

Like it was your favorite year

Ugh, not even something from “Cowboy Take Me Away”? I’m disappointed on so many levels, Tay-Tay.

*Yeah, I know that Taylor is 21 years old. That makes the complete believability of that scenario even more troubling, don’t you think?