Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Shaquille O'Neal

Shaquille O’Neal Is the Reason Twitter Exists

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I can’t stop laughing at this.

A lot of people ask me what Twitter’s about, and why I use it, and why it matters, and there are so many reasons for its coolness and it’s so hard to put into words the awesomeness of Twitter, but this is a good example. I’ve been following Shaq’s Twitter (it’s here) for awhile now, and every single thing he tweets makes me smile. It’s just so cool to get to know what this uber-celeb athlete is thinking every day, and to see that this gigantic dunk machine is actually someone who I would probably have a blast just hanging out with.

He spent Saturday in Mesa at an charity event LeBron James and Jay-Z put on, and apparently he was at a comedy roast and lost his voice laughing and cheering so loudly. How cool is that?? I would have never known that about this guy — I would have never seen him as a real person.

Twitter is so awesome.

If you don’t have an account, get one. And follow me, too! A lot of my best tipsters send me info via Twitter. That’s another reason it rocks!

“Kobe, Tell Me How My Ass Tastes!”

OMG this is genius.

You guys have to check out this clip of Shaquille O’Neal rapping at an NYC club last night. I couldn’t stop laughing.

This dude should just give up the whole basketball thing and focus on slamming Kobe Bryant in his raps.

After spending several verses shredding Kobe apart for losing in the NBA playoffs, Shaq drops the line, “I’m a horse, Kobe ratted me out, that’s why I’m getting divorced.”

The line most likely references a comment Kobe made during his infamous 2003 rape case, when he told Colorado police that he “Should have done what Shaq does … Shaq would pay his women not to say anything.” The two became famously bitter rivals after the incident.

Watch the video here.

Shaq’s Quite the Player

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Now that he’s on the path to divorce, it looks like Shaquille O’Neal is single and ready to mingle. And by “mingle” I of course mean “have lots of hot sex with random hot chicks.”

Says a driver for the basketball star: “Every time Shaq is in town, I get the call, and let me tell you: He’s got more women leaving his hotel room then any celebrity I’ve ever seen. Every time he stayed at the Marriott in South Beach, he had a blonde or a brunette with him.”

Seriously, you could not pay me enough money to have sex with Shaquille O’Neal. I think we all know why. I mean, have you seen his hands? OUCH!!!