Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Sarah Silverman

American Music Awards Outfits: The Best, Worst, And WTF


The American Music Awards happened and I don’t think anyone really cared that much, but here’s your outfit recap, just in case. Yeah, it’s a day late. Honestly, who really cares? We covered Katy Perry’s “is this offensive” Geisha performance, which was probably the most interesting thing of the whole night. So here’s the outfits, a touch late, but we can still have fun oooo-ing and aaaah-ing and WTF-ing. Which is what I’ll need your help with. I want you to pick the best, worst, and most WTF outfit of the night. Here we go!

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The Best, Worst, and WTF Of Emmy Fashion

kelly osbourne emmys 2013

Kelly Osbourne. From the front, this looked lovely. From the back, it looks like the dress is covered in fire ants and there’s nothing anybody can do about it. It belongs to the ants now.

2013 Emmy Awards have come and gone and a few people cared. This post is for you. Let’s take a look at the best, worst, and WTF of 2013 Emmy fashion. I know Lena Dunham’s outfit is bound to get a few people talking.

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Love It or Leave It: Sarah Silverman is Trying Fancy

photo of sarah silverman sydney premiere wreck-it ralph
Hey! Guess who still doesn’t really care all that much for Sarah Silverman even if she is dressed all fancy and not smoking joints in public parking lots!

Me, guys. It’d be me. Sarah looks presentable enough, but you can’t put a party dress on shit and expect it not to stink, you know? This is what Sarah wore to the Australia premiere of ‘Wreck-It Ralph’, and I’m just not feeling it, no way, no how.

Love it or leave it?

Michelle Williams and Sarah Silverman Are Nude in the Shower If You Care About That Kind of Thing

photo of michelle williams and sarah silverman nudes pictures
And I know probably most of you do, since a lot of our search engine traffic comes from the nudie pics we just love to throw around like dollar bill-rain on seedy strippers.

The photos (which are obviously NSFW and after the jump) show Michelle Williams, Sarah Silverman, and some other well-endowed chick in some full-frontal, rather bushy nudity while they lather up and rinse in a community shower. The stills are from their movie, ‘Take This Waltz’, which we’ve talked about here on the site for just how generally sucky it looks.

Michelle has a cutesy little body and natural bazongas, and in all of the photos she keeps her arms raised up over her head—the international sign for “I was pregnant once and my tits have never been the same so I keep my arms up high to make ‘em less saggy looking” (believe me, I KNOW)—and Sarah’s tits are surprisingly nice, though the rest of her body looks like a grandmother’s, save for the fact that there’s nary a wrinkle in sight.

Jump in to see the full-frontals, and here’s a hint: click on the photo to enlarge it to epic proportions.

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Celebrities Reveal Their Favorite Sex Positions

photo of gwyneth paltrow on the conversation pics
From Starpulse:

Celebrity guests on the premiere episode of Amanda De Cadenet’s new chat show “The Conversation” were quizzed about their favorite sex positions.

Gwyneth Paltrow, Zoe Saldana, Jane Fonda and Sarah Silverman were all asked what makes them most comfortable in intimate settings.

The racy question raised eyebrows for Fonda and prompted de Cadenet’s longtime pal Paltrow to shriek, “What?”

Silverman said, “I do enjoy a good sound missionary-ing… and I like to be manhandled.”

Saldana replied, “I like missionary and I like being on my knees too. And I love being on top… I love doggy-style or standing up.”

Candid Fonda offered: “While I am quite flexible and I can kneel, it’s not quite as comfortable for me as it used to be before I had a fake knee… (I like to be) either lying down or sitting up on a couch with him coming on to me, no pun intended.”

After her initial shock, Paltrow added, “I’m down with all of them.”

Ha! Of course Gwyneth Paltrow was all taken aback by the question. God, she probably hasn’t had sex since Brad Pitt back in 1997! And Sarah Silverman, peh. For as raunchy and down-and-dirty nasty as she pretends to be, you’d think she’d have come up with a better answer than “I do enjoy a good sound missionary-ing …” because what? She feels the need to play coy to The Conversation‘s easy-to-offend audience? No, because the audience isn’t easy to offend, but Sarah likes to pander to whomever she sees as important for the minute. OK, I’m done ranting about Sarah Silverman for right now. Needless to say, she’s not one of my favorite people in Hollywood, but if you’ve been here as long as I have, you probably already knew that.

Jane Fonda is still totally hot for her age (which is seventy-four if you can believe it), and her detailed answer (minus the fake knee thing, all that was successful in was making me cringe with my whole spirit) was, by far, the best and least-rehearsed, but I’m thinking she should probably elaborate the whole “sitting on a couch” thing, because that just sounds frightening and geriatric, at best.

Zoe Saldana did best with what she had to work with, and gave us a peek into what a very active sex life with People’s Sexiest Man Alive was probably like. Don’t be jealous.

Did you guys watch The Conversation this past weekend?

Sarah Silverman Thinks It’s OK to Smoke Pot in a Public Parking Lot

photo of sarah silverman pictures photos smoking a joint drugs in parking lot in LA pics

I mean, I thought so too, when I was seventeen, but friends, the times have changed. Willie Nelson’s in some pretty big trouble (in Texas) and Chace Crawford hit a similar patch of trouble (in Texas), so if Sarah’s smart, she’ll stay out of parking lots while smoking marijuana (in Texas).

No, but seriously, though – feel the way you want about pot and its effects and whether or not it’s better or worse than alcohol consumption blah blah blah – that’s not my debate today – but the fact remains that unless you have a “prescription” for it, it’s still illegal regardless if you like it, love it, disagree with it, or think its very existence is unnecessary.

It is what it is, but apparently not to Sarah Silverman.

Celebrity Tweets of the Day: LA Is Weird Edition

I noticed that on Fridayish a lot of celebrities tweeted about something called “Carmageddon,” and I thought it was so weird that a 1997 computer game was suddenly getting this much visibility. So I googled for answers. Turns out the LAPD actually asked celebrities to go on Twitter and announce that the 405 Freeway will be closed all weekend. Yawn.

Speaking of the freeway, this is not Kathy Griffin‘s best look:

Got mah hair did. Ladies, try hangin ur head on the window goin 55MPH

However, this is a very good look for Ricky Gervais:

Gervais, who is too lazy to tweet, sent me this pic of his obscene new toy

In spite of his technical difficulties, I still say Steve Martin is the only old man who should be allowed on Twitter:

Much as I enjoy Sarah Silverman, that was a mysterious retweet off my iPad

As for Sarah Silverman, she is so right about this next thing. She should be a theater critic!

Yeah ok great acting sometimes involves spit strings

I think Yoko Ono is trying to get all existential and meta:

Is anything lopsided in your room? Would you like more lopsided things?

(I read that and snorted, and then I looked up and stared at my off-kilter lampshade, which is always and irretrievably off-kilter, and then I sloooowly realized that maybe Yoko Ono wants me to tilt my entire living room to match my one lampshade.)

Rob Schneider hasn’t made a good movie in ages—or ever?—but his career could be worse. He definitely has his priorities straight:

Happiness is not being on Celebrity Rehab!

P.S. Jerry Seinfeld just joined Twitter. Should we tell him about Google+? Or should we let him wait five years?