Today's Evil Beet Gossip
Sarah Larson

At Least George Clooney’s New Girlfriend Doesn’t Look Exactly Like His Old Girlfriend

George Clooney and Girlfriend Elisabetta Canalis at London Premiere of Fantastic Mr. Fox Pictures Photos

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Oh, wait.

(At the London premiere of The Fantastic Mr. Fox. Also there: Cindy Crawford. Who also looks exactly like one of George Clooney’s girlfriends. But it’s not like he has a type.)

Hey, Look Who’s in My Neck of the Woods!

It’s Sarah Larson, throwing like a girl at a charity softball game in Tacoma.

I wish I’d known!

A friend of mine wanted me to come with her to the So You Think You Can Dance tour in Tacoma last night. I was like, “Listen, bitch, if you won’t come with me to see New Kids on the Block, you’re not exactly in a position to ask any favors.” But if I’d known Sarah Larson was in town! I would have driven my friend to Tacoma, dropped her off at the tour, then bought an ant farm and delivered it to Sarah Larson’s suitcase. I can’t believe I missed this opportunity.

Why I Didn’t Run the “Naughty” Sarah Larson Photos

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Because, as much as I hate the girl, she’s not doing anything wrong in them. She’s not even naked for chrissake. She’s behaving like a run-of-the-mill twenty-something goofing around with her friends. There are 20,000 photos out there of me doing the same shit. In fact, there are plenty of photos of me out there doing worse shit. Just track down my Facebook page. Or MySpace. And it’s not something I’m embarrassed about or I hide because, ya know, I’m not doing anything wrong. I’m behaving like a single, childless twenty-something who hits the clubs or the beach and gets crazy with her girlfriends, because, like, it’s fun and normal and healthy to do that. I dunno, I guess I thought the story was kind of boring. I’m waiting for that little whore to cheat on George with, like, John Mayer. Those are the photos I’m waiting for.

But if you care, the whole set is here.