21Sandra Bullock to Become a Full-Time Mommy!

Nope, she’s not preggers — but Sandra Bullock will now be a full-time mom to the daughter of her husband, Jesse James. That’s because the mom of the little girl — a 5-year-old named Sunny — is a porn star who is heading to federal prison. That’s hot!

On March 10, Sunny’s mother, former adult film star Janine Lindemulder, 40, will head for federal prison to serve a six-month sentence for income tax evasion. While Janine is behind bars, an Orange County, Calif., court awarded temporary full custody of Sunny to Jesse.

Does anyone else think it’s really funny that a porn star is going to jail for tax evasion? Like, of all the reasons you’d expect a washed-up porn star to go to jail … she didn’t pay her taxes! It’s the same shit they keep getting Joe Francis on, too. Pay your taxes, people!

For her part, Sandra is already close with Sunny, and they’re often spotted hitting up the playground together.

“I don’t see the difference in having blood-related kids or children who come with your husband,” said Sandra said last spring. “I am very blessed.”

Awww, I love this attitude. I was just talking with a friend last night about how I really don’t care how I come by kids — they don’t necessarily have to come out my vagina and have my chromosomes — I just want to be a mom!

February 6, 2009 at 1:53 pm by Evil Beet

11Sandra Bullock Is Married?

I always forget about that. Probably because she doesn’t make her marriage a publicity stunt, which is also probably why she’s still married. She’s married to Jesse James, and the two were in a car accident in Massachussetts on Friday night when they were hit by a drunk driver. And I get to be funny about this because no one was injured.

“They were shaken up, needless to say,” said a police rep. “But they were fine – he was hugging her. Jess and Sandra were hugging. They said they were fine, they didn’t need medical attention. There were quite a few people snapping pictures of them.”

The driver was a 64-year-old woman who blew a .20 on the breathalyzer. That’s two-and-a-half times the legal limit. In a 64-year-old woman. Wow. Somebody get this old lady to rehab. I mean, when you’re pulled over shit-faced drunk at that age, it’s probably not because you accidentally had a few too many beers at the club with your friends. It’s because you were doing some hard-core, dedicated, unhealthy drinking. Do they have old-lady rehabs? Instead of giving out free coffee at their AA meetings, they could give out free crochet supplies and Ensure.

Call a cab, people! Even if you’re a senior citizen!!!

April 19, 2008 at 11:08 pm by Evil Beet

1Late-Night Links

The long-awaited video (seriously, it took a whole day — that’s like a lifetime in the blogosphere) of Jessica Simpson running off-stage at the Kennedy Center Awards has at last arrived. [MollyGood]

Reverend Jesse Jackson is urging the public to boycott Seinfeld DVDs after star Michael Richards’ much-publicized racist rant reportedly prompted a spike in DVD sales for the show. My guess is the thought process surrounding most of these purchases went more along the lines of “Oh, hey, I forgot about Kramer. Man, Seinfeld sure was funny. Those DVDs would make a great Christmas gift,” and less along the lines of “You mean that Kramer guy’s a racist? Oh, now I’ll buy the DVDs.” A Jason Alexander crotch shot probably would have had a similar impact. But whatever. [CelebSlam]

Beyonce Knowles and Jennifer Hudson are supposedly having some manner of non-feud regarding who upstaged whom in Dreamgirls. I’m not sure if I believe it less than I care, or vice versa. [TMZ]

Porn star Kendra Jade knows words like “disheartened,” “inevitable,” and “salacious.” That or her publicist does. Either way, she didn’t sleep with K-Fed. She has standards. [JordanIsYourHomeboy]

Sandra Bullock is either pregnant or she isn’t. [Celebrity Smack]

December 6, 2006 at 6:40 am by Evil Beet

0Quote of the Day

“Finally, to my boyfriend, who I happen to be married to…with the good loving you give me every day, and especially last night…it’s no coincidence that I’m freer and braver to leave the house, because I can’t fail, because I get to come home to you.”

Sandra Bullock at the 10th Annual Hollywood Awards

Wow Sandra. I’m jealous.

October 26, 2006 at 5:57 pm by Evil Beet